


Savage Beauty

by sap1066



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark Rey (Star Wars), Dark Side Rey, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Visions, Kylo Ren Redemption, Movie: Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Movie: Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Movie: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Resistance, Romance, The Dark Side of the Force, The Rise of Skywalker Fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2020-11-26 00:28:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 77,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20921171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sap1066/pseuds/sap1066
Summary: This is a re-imagining of some of the events of The Rise of Skywalker because I just cannot live with that ending.It has been a year since the death of Luke Skywalker, and the galaxy has moved on. Jedi training complete, Rey now sits at the heart of a resurgent Resistance while Kylo Ren’s empire cements its grasp over the territories which have fallen under First Order control. But a new power behind the throne is rising, and it triggers a change of heart which seems far too good to be true…He made to move around her and she blinked in surprise. ‘Wait – that’s it? You’re going to let me go just like that?’He didn’t hesitate, stepping across the threshold and starting across the apartment in the direction of the door. ‘Of course. I can’t make you love me if you don’t want to.’‘But...’ she stammered. ‘Aren’t you even going to try?’Thumbing the door panel he turned back, just for a moment. ‘I’ve been trying all day,’ he said.





	1. In a cave

This is a mistake.

Poe’s warning echoed in her mind long after his ship had faded to a speck amongst the stars. Finn hadn’t said a word, not even goodbye, but Rey could tell he was thinking the same thing.

She sighed, kicked a stone into the shallow crater left by one of the Millennium Falcon’s landing struts and watched the dust swirl. This was almost certainly a mistake, but it was the right thing to do.

Hoisting her knapsack onto her shoulder she began the long walk down the narrow, twisting trail that would lead to the bottom of the sinkhole. No ships were allowed at the site itself, that was one of the conditions of access, and it applied to both sides.

Twilight fell heavy here in the forgotten end of the Outer Rim and the path was soon smothered by darkness, the flimsy light of Rey’s torch doing little to penetrate the gloom thrown by the canyon walls. She sorely needed to meditate, but the right frame of mind eluded her, every step tightening the coil of tension inside. Some primitive survival instinct thought this was a mistake too.

She hissed between her teeth as a foot skidded, slipping on loose gravel and her fingertips left a layer of skin on the rock walls. Focus. Concentrate. What was it that Leia had said? Breathe. Or had that been Luke?

The problem was not so much the tension, or the nerves, or the fear or whatever she wanted to call it. The problem was excitement. She was excited. Some nasty little part of her that hadn’t been listening during Jedi training, that had skipped important passages in the Jedi texts, that deeply buried, shameful little voice kept insisting that this was a mistake worth making, that little voice was glad. Rey walked and tried to concentrate.

Several hours later the path kicked her out at the bottom of the sinkhole and she stepped into a different world. This moon shared the same characteristics as the planet it orbited, all its water having abandoned the surface to the lashing winds, taking refuge underground. Here at the bottom of the hole, trees still flourished, spindly and fragile looking, their branches stretching desperately towards the distant star. Rey passed between the slender trunks, a thick blanket of moss muting her steps. She hesitated to approach the clearing in the centre of the forest, already knowing what she’d find, and instead explored the walls of the canyon, locating a good-sized cave a short scramble up one side which gave an uninterrupted view of the scene.

She was still gathering sticks when she heard it, the distinctive whine of sub light ion engines, throttled back in descent. The excitement inside her flared abruptly and she shook her head at it, retreating into the cave to light a fire.

From somewhere far away an answering light twinkled into being, disappearing at intervals behind the rough canyon walls as its bearer struggled with the path. Rey made dinner, rehydrated stew, enough for one, and left it to simmer over the fire. The plan was to wait, and watch, and make sure that nothing happened – no conversation, no physical contact and definitely no weapons. All the details had been thrashed out in advance, she only had to see it through. But as she set off through the trees Poe’s warning echoed inside her head.

Waiting in the centre of the clearing, hands clasped loosely, the pristine white folds of her new ceremonial outfit arranged in the proper order, she closed her eyes and let her senses widen through the Force. She’d thought she would feel him before she saw him, but the Force was as silent about his presence as it had been for most of the last year and in the end, only the snapping of a twig alerted her to his arrival. She gestured, and the circle of lights surrounding the casket switched up a notch, bathing the clearing in a gentle, yellow glow.

He was still wearing black, and the mask was back, although it had been badly repaired and the lines that scored it throbbed blood red in the dim light. He paused, some way away and his attention wasn’t directed at her, but towards the object she guarded. There was a faint creak of leather as his fists clenched and he kicked himself into action again, striding forward until all he had to do was reach out and touch.

Rey fell back as he approached, putting the coffin between them, standing silently as she waited for him to make a move.

A hand emerged from the folds of his cloak, the shake in it only perceptible to someone watching very closely but it remained hovering a short distance above the lid. Rey knew that, as agreed, the blank metal would become transparent when touched and once again she would see the face of Leia, her friend, mentor and latterly teacher, laid out in the funeral garb Rey had chosen, holding the flowers Rey had picked.

A sudden lump constricted her throat, her eyes burned and any residual trace of excitement evaporated in the twin passions of grief and anger.

There was a grating noise from the apparatus across the coffin and the voice of Leia’s son, a man who had disgraced himself so badly he no longer deserved her name cut the silence. ‘How did she die?’

The volume was lower than she’d been expecting, the words garbled and strained and if Rey hadn’t known better, she would have thought he was having difficulty speaking.

She straightened her back, chin up but her voice was calm; she cried all her tears already. ‘She was blown out of her ship into space. She lost her friends. She lost her husband. She lost her brother. She lost her son. No one survives that. Not even her.’

‘Leave us,’ he barked, but she was already walking away.

The woman in the coffin, Leia, princess, senator, general, Organa and Solo and Skywalker had been dead for a week, although her health had been failing for months. The medics said the time she had spent floating about without oxygen had damaged her lungs and a lot more besides, and over the last twelve months her body had entered a slow cascade failure where one organ after the next had shut down.

Leia had fought it, but half-heartedly in Rey’s view.

Coughing and spluttering Leia passed onto Rey the instructions and Jedi training she’d had from Luke, hanging on just long enough to see it completed and then she’d given up. There were mechanical solutions that could have been tried, cybernetics and transplants that would have given Leia years more life but Rey could see she’d lost interest. Even the resurgence of the Resistance couldn’t jolt her out of the depression she’d gone into after watching her son on HoloNet being crowned Supreme Leader, lord of the galaxy; laying waste to the last of her hopes.

Still, Leia’s funeral tomorrow was going to be epic.

Rose had been planning it for months, quietly and discreetly, because Poe wanted to use it as a means of consolidating support for the Resistance and as a result the whole event was going to be huge. And very, very secret, of course. The First Order would have loved nothing more than to wipe out all its enemies in one go, so as soon as Kylo Ren was finished paying his respects – however limited those might be – Leia’s body would be shipped off world and transferred to her final resting place.

No one had told Rey where that resting place was, because no one was quite sure that the solitary mourner Rey had left coffin-side wouldn’t torture her for the details, or pluck the location from her mind without her noticing.

‘Of course,’ General Dameron had chuckled, in that maddeningly reasonable tone he’d cultivated since the baton of command had been passed to him. ‘If you don’t go through with it we’ll happily tell you. Hell, you can write the invites yourself.’

Rey gritted her teeth, remembering the conversation.

‘But it’s the right thing to do,’ she’d insisted. ‘Leia was his mother. He has the right to say goodbye.’

‘He has no rights.’ Finn was on Poe’s side, as always. ‘He killed her.’

‘Leia didn’t think it was Ben who pulled the trigger. You know that, I’ve told you enough times.’

‘He might not have pulled the trigger,’ Rose cut in. ‘But he’s still responsible. The First Order have caused so many deaths already, why should he care about one more?’

Finn squeezed Rose’s hand under the table.

‘He cares.’ Rey was sure. After a year of complete absence from Ben the ripples that Leia’s death had sent through the Force had been met with a massive conflagration of rage, an explosion so wild that Rey had rocked back on her heels just sensing it. ‘It’s too late to hide it. He knows. He knows she’s dead and he’s not happy about it. If we don’t tell him where she is he’ll come and find her himself.’

‘The Supreme Leader is not getting an invitation to the funeral.’ Rose’s tone brooked no argument.

‘I’m not suggesting that he does,’ Rey mused. ‘There might be another way…’

The Force no longer connected them so Rey had done it the old-fashioned way – opened a comms channel and sent a message coded as personal. Some time later, the First Order responded and the Resistance leadership had had a little explosion of their own.

‘We are not surrendering her body,’ yelled Poe. ‘She was one of us.’

‘We are not surrendering anything,’ Finn agreed hotly. ‘And nor are we standing trial for negligence, failure to provide adequate medical attention or – ‘ He consulted his holopad. ‘Culpable homicide.’

‘I’m not going to any funeral they’ve organised,’ Rose muttered.

So Rey negotiated, although she wasn’t really sure why she was bothering and after a few days an agreement was duly signed and sealed and a date was set. Neither side trusted the other, and in fact Rey was pretty sure that the Resistance had mined the entire base of the sinkhole so they could blow it up if the First Order tried anything.

Outside the cave it had started to rain, with the sort of rain that only a planet prone to storms could manufacture. The deluge didn’t seem to consist of individual drops, it was more like a continuous river falling out of the sky, battering at the treetops and threatening to flood the mouth of the cave. Rey poked at the fire, threw on some more logs, jumping at the first peal of thunder. Squinting out into the darkness she could no longer see the ring of lights set up around the coffin, assuming they’d either shorted out or been washed away.

He’d be on his way home soon, she reasoned. It was nearly time to contact the Resistance.

The splosh of heavy boots and a string of explicit curses froze her in the act of searching her pack. She straightened, putting her back to the wall, her hand groping for her missing lightsaber.

Kylo Ren blew in from the darkness, bringing most of the storm with him. Rain cascaded off his helmet, his cloak was plastered to him and the front of his tunic shone with beads of water. Ignoring her, he stalked over to the wood she’d collected for her fire and spent some time jamming sticks into the dirt floor around it.

Then, keeping his back to her, he began to disrobe.

The mask came off first, spilling so much rain from the inside that Rey vaguely wondered about the efficacy of the repairs before he stuck it on a log to dry. The cloak was discarded next, a heavy slap filling the air as it was draped over a hastily constructed tripod and then he bent to struggle with his boots. Once they were upended and steaming gently by the crackling flames, his hands moved to fiddle with the front of his tunic and Rey was jerked out of her silence.

‘Don’t you dare take that off,’ she blurted, without thinking.

He didn’t turn, dropping his belt to the floor and tugging at the sodden sleeves. ‘Never bothered you before.’

‘It did bother me before.’ She remembered like it was yesterday, seeing his naked chest and the scar she’d scratched down it, realising he was human after all.

He was wearing a shirt underneath. She breathed a silent sigh of relief, although it was apparent from the back that the shirt too was wet and it clung to him, moulded to all his hard muscle and bone.

He flicked her a pitying glance, clearly aware of the attention. ‘You haven’t changed.’

There was a sneer in his voice but she met his stare, read his secrets. Although his face was ash white the skin around his eyes was slightly puffy, the merest suggestion of red marked his nose and there was water still on his cheeks that might have been rain and might have been something else.

‘You have,’ she said, wondering.

He put his back to her again, standing close by the fire with his hands outstretched towards it. There was a silence broken only by the splutter of wood meeting heat and the beat of the rain.

‘Thank you for this,’ he said at length, although it sounded like the words were being dragged out of his against his will.

‘I didn’t make it for you,’ she snapped.

‘Not the fire.’ His hands dropped to his sides, twitching in a gesture that encompassed the whole cave, the moon and everything on it. ‘For this. You didn’t have to.’

She thought she understood the sentiment, although she wasn’t sure she understood the man expressing it. ‘It was the right thing to do.’

He rolled over a log, crouched on it, and lapsed into silence again. Sensing no danger, she picked up her pack and edged carefully around the fire, ending up sitting on the opposite side.

This new Supreme Leader wasn’t exactly the man she remembered. Perhaps his mother’s death had changed him. Or perhaps he was simply playing out some wider plan.

This wasn’t the first time she’d scrutinised him over a fire and as she sat there watching the interplay of light and shadow across his features it came to her that she’d missed him. That was the excitement she’d felt, the illicit pleasure that she might see him again. It wasn’t that they were close, she decided, they’d never been friends, never shared secrets or adventures and most of the time she hated every atom of his being but with Luke and Leia gone there wasn’t anyone else left who could do what she could do. No one who understood her as they had. She’d spent the last year training but Leia was sick and frail and there had been no one against whom to test her developing powers. No one who might stand as her equal. And that was what she had missed about him – that was what she wanted – the challenge.

She leaned forward. ‘Did you bring your lightsaber?’ She couldn’t disguise the excitement behind the words.

His eyes snapped up. ‘Did I bring a weapon to my own mother’s funeral? Did I come armed, even though I was instructed not to? Did I bring anything with which to defend myself against the blaster you have hidden in that bag you’re sitting on, or against the baradium bombs stashed in the back of this cave, or against the entire squadron of fighters the Resistance has concealed behind the seventh moon?’ He jerked his head. ‘I left it on the shuttle. This is a truce.’

She sat back, excitement fading. ‘I didn’t know about the X-wings,’ she clarified. ‘And the blaster was just for lighting the fire.’

He scowled at that, reached out for a stick and stoked up the flames, a shower of sparks rising towards the ceiling, camouflaging his face. ‘Did she suffer? At the end – was it quick?’

The words were deceptively casual, but Rey could hear the tension behind them.

‘It wasn’t quick,’ she answered carefully. ‘It took years, but I think you know that. She wasn’t in pain, or if she was she didn’t show it. But she suffered. One way or another, you took everything she had.’

It sounded harsh, but she wasn’t telling him anything he didn’t already know. His choices had consequences and most of them had been borne by the woman in the casket.

‘Why didn’t you come to me when it became obvious she was ill? Why didn’t you ask for proper medical help? I could have saved her. I would have tried.’

Rey raised an eyebrow. ‘I never knew you cared. She didn’t either.’

He jumped back from the fire as if he’d been scorched, hurtled towards the mouth of the cave and then stopped, one hand outstretched.

‘What are you doing?’ She rose to her feet but he simply stood, his face knotted in concentration.

To her amazement, from out of the deluge appeared the unmistakeable shape of a flawlessly white, upsilon class command shuttle, all its running lights and engines off, propelled only by the power of the Force.

‘Fetching my lightsaber,’ he said.

She was just the slightest bit impressed.

The ship landed yards from the cave and the moment the ramp was down he was off, barefoot and still damp, storming away into the dark interior and leaving her alone. She waited a while, but he didn’t come back so she ate her dinner, repacked her bag, confirmed the existence of the cache of explosives he’d mentioned and considered whether or not to follow him.

This could quite easily be a trap. He could be attempting to lure her onto his ship so that he could incapacitate and capture her, before carrying her away to face another interrogation. Or he could simply be trying to process his grief in as much privacy as possible. Rey didn’t imagine for one minute that this sort of weakness would be tolerated back at the First Order. And he did appear to be genuinely grieving, his behaviour suggesting he was open, vulnerable in a way he hadn’t been since the last fireplace on Ahch-To.

The shuttle was still dark as she crept up the ramp, fingers grazing over walls that were scarred with plasma burns, past equipment cleaved in two and badly repaired, over smashed screens, missing switches, hopelessly mangled wiring. Perfect on the outside, the inside of this shuttle clearly bore the brunt of its master’s rage on a regular basis. Rey almost felt sorry for it.

There was a single spotlight on in the main passenger cabin and through the gloom she picked out a back clad figure, hunched over something concealed in a drawer. If he heard her approach he gave no sign.

His whisper cut the silence. ‘It calls me again, grandfather. Show me, show me the power of the darkness.’

His body went completely still for a few seconds, half a minute maybe, and then he exhaled in a rush before begging all over again. ‘Show me the power of the darkness.’

Moving as quietly as she possibly could, Rey crept up behind him, taking advantage of the intervals during which he was rendered immobile to make more progress until she could see over his shoulder.

‘Why do you have Darth Vader’s mask in a drawer?’ Surprise sprang the question out of her mouth before she could stop it.

He froze and his hand fluttered out as if he was going to seal away the evidence, before he dropped it to his knee. ‘When I have doubts, this helps.’

She didn’t know what to be more surprised by – the fact that he was hiding a melted helmet or the fact that he was willing to answer questions about it.

‘And – do you have doubts often?’ she asked, sensing the importance of his answer. There wasn’t one forthcoming, so she answered it herself. ‘Often enough that you need to carry around this, this piece of garbage with you everywhere you go so you can keep reminding yourself how great the dark side is, yes?’ She put a hand on his shoulder, noting absently that he’d changed into dry clothes. ‘Ben, we should talk about this.’

He flung off her hand with a savage jerk of his shoulder, lurched away from her touch and suddenly there was the Kylo Ren she remembered, gazing out at her with rage blazing in his eyes, fury apparent in the stiff lines of his lips.

‘I do not need to discuss anything with you,’ he spat. ‘Touch it. Go on. Put your hand out, touch it and say the words. Then tell me what you know of the dark side.’

He had gone mad. Power had turned his mind. There was no other explanation. Why else would he be sitting in the dark praying to a hunk of melted plasteel?

She put her hands up very, very slowly, took a single, non-threatening step backwards but he lunged for her, the red blade springing to life in his hand and completing its swing inches from her neck.

‘I said, touch it.’ The humming beam wavered closer. ‘Now.’

With her lightsaber back on the Millennium Falcon, Rey was going to have to humour him if she wanted to get off this ship in one piece so she reached down with a single finger and rested it on the bent mouthguard.

‘Say the words,’ he gritted, his eyes boring into hers.

‘Show me the power of the darkness,’ she repeated, already plotting the manoeuvres she was going to have to complete in order to disarm him.

And then everything changed. The brutalised interior of the command shuttle disappeared and Rey was somewhere else.

‘It’s a holocron?’ she gasped in shock, staggering backwards.

The part of her that was still in her own body knew that the red threat had been extinguished and a hardness against the back of her legs was a chair that someone had positioned behind her so that she could sit down.

‘Not exactly. It’s something else. I’m not sure what. Just – tell me what you see.’ His voice came from far away, calmer now that she was doing what she was told.

Rey was fascinated. Most of the Jedi holocrons had been destroyed and the one or two that Leia had managed to track down had given only a small glimpse into a vast landscape of knowledge that Rey badly wanted to explore.

‘I’m on a step. No, it’s not a step, it’s a dais. I’m in a throne room. There’s a throne in front of me and there’s someone sitting on it. It’s a man. I can’t see him clearly. He’s…’

It was like looking through fog. There were shapes in the fog but they were indistinct, formless until she got right up close, until she willed them to coalesce with a flicker of power. The fog shifted.

‘He’s you. I see you, Ben. You’re sitting on Snoke’s throne and you’re Supreme Leader of the First Order. Is this a recent recording? Why did you want me to watch it? Your coronation was all over HoloNet, everyone saw it.’

‘It’s not a recording. It’s my destiny. Ever since I first found this mask years ago, I’ve seen what you can see right now. Before I killed Snoke I knew I’d take his throne – my grandfather foretold it.’

But the fog continued to clear and Rey saw more. ‘There’s something wrong with you,’ she breathed. ‘You don’t look right. Your face is different, you’re younger. You’re…you look…’ She struggled to put words to the swirling impressions that had taken over her sight. ‘Happy? Content?’

‘In the vision I am whole,’ he said. ‘No doubts. No conflict. I am Supreme Leader and I am sure. Focused. Keep watching.’

The Ben in her mind’s eye was looking to his left and as she followed the direction of his gaze she discerned a bulky shape and something stretched out from it, something thinner, delicate.

‘There’s another throne. Someone is sitting beside you with their hand out. You’re sharing power with someone. It’s not Hux is it? Or that new general, what’s he called? Pryde?’ She frowned, correcting herself. ‘No, it’s a woman, I see her now. She has a black dress and her hair is brown, and long and I think she’s smiling at you and she’s familiar. It’s...’ She stopped, realising. ‘I’d like to finish this now, thanks very much.’

She shook head to clear it, concentrated on the feeling of her legs on the hard chair to bring her back to herself and groped for the awareness of her hand, so she could remove it from the mask.

Back in the real world another hand clamped itself over hers, refusing to let her escape and a strident voice in her ear demanded, ‘Keep watching. Tell me what you see.’

The image spooled on and she described it with mounting disgust. ‘It’s me. I’m sitting next to you. I’m ruling with you. This is why you asked me to join you last year, isn’t it? Not because I meant anything to you, but because Darth Vader told you to.’

The woman on the throne simpered, and smiled and made Rey sick to her stomach.

‘I knew.’ His words breathed into her ear, a whisper of secret revelation. ‘I’d always seen a partner, but I couldn’t make out her face and then when I was told Dameron’s droid had escaped with a girl I knew. Or I suspected. It was only when you read my mind and the first thing you mentioned was Darth Vader that I was sure. After that, I knew you’d come to me. This is your destiny too.’

If Rey had been able to remove her hand from Kylo’s grisly heirloom she would have run and run and never looked back. But he was holding her in place and the vision had more horrors yet to divulge.

‘Keep watching,’ he said. ‘And listen.’

She continued narrating, resigned now, and determined to show him nothing but her iron disapproval. ‘I’m pregnant. I’m sitting on the throne, holding your hand and I’m pregnant. I expect it’s twins. I’m waving to my loyal subjects. No, I’m not, I’m turning around. There’s someone behind me. Someone’s behind the throne.‘

From somewhere distant a flicker of pain brushed her awareness and she had the distinct sense that back on the shuttle her fingers were being crushed.

‘You see it too.’

‘There’s someone there. He’s tall, dressed in black. He’s shiny. How can he be shiny? Oh no, it’s…’

She heard it then. A rasp of laboured breathing, the tortured respiration of a mask she had never heard in life, but was clutching now in death. ‘It’s Darth Vader.’

‘Listen,’ Kylo Ren whispered into her ear.

The figure in her vision stirred slightly. ‘Find me,’ he said.

Rey yanked her hand off the helmet, snatched it back from Kylo’s grip, kicked over the chair and staggered away from the drawer as her eyes swam painfully back into focus.

In front of her Kylo straightened, his face bright with a zealot’s fervour. ‘You heard him,’ he crowed, clenching a fist. ‘I knew you would. He’s alive. Darth Vader is alive.’


	2. The necklace and the wayfinder

Rey took a small, careful pace towards the door. This whole escapade had unquestionably been a mistake, and now she had to extricate herself from the situation as quickly as possible, and live long enough to hear Poe saying, ‘I told you so’.

‘He can’t be alive.’ The best way to deal with this was going to be calmly, using reason and logic. ‘Look at the mask, Ben. It’s melted. Luke said he burnt the body. He wouldn’t have lied about something like that.’

‘My uncle would have lied about anything.’ There was a snarl in his voice and Rey kicked herself for mentioning Luke in the first place.

‘Then how do you know that the visions that thing is showing you are the truth?’

‘You know nothing of the dark side. It never lies. My grandfather promised me power, and now I rule the galaxy.’

‘Your grandfather also promised you me, with a bellyful of children but you don’t have that, do you?’

Something in his expression shifted. ‘Not yet.’

Rey took a very large pace backwards, less carefully.

‘And how do you even know that it’s your grandfather showing you these visions? Anyone could have set up that mask as a holocron and just waited for you to find it. What about Snoke? Maybe it was him?’

‘I didn’t see Darth Vader until Snoke was dead. My grandfather speaks to me. He shows me my destiny.’

‘Then why haven’t you done anything about it?’ she countered. ‘If you’ve been seeing that vision for a year why haven’t you found him yet?’

Something more sensible returned to his expression and the waves of triumph pouring off him receded slightly. ‘I had…doubts,’ he admitted. His gaze shifted slightly to the right and he focused on something past her shoulder. ‘I thought it might be wish fulfilment – that I was just seeing what I wanted to see, but you...’ His attention sharpened on her again. ‘You see it too.’

There was something like gratitude in his tone, relief possibly, but Rey’s mind was spinning over connections, weaving conclusions from the threads.

‘And I’m the only one who can, aren’t I? You killed Snoke, you couldn’t ask him about the mask and there aren’t any other dark side users as far as I know. Your uncle is dead, we’ve been hiding Leia too well over the last year to make sure you couldn’t get to her and now she’s dead too, which just leaves me. You needed me.‘ She caught her breath. ‘More than that. You needed me here and you needed me compliant, not fighting you. And you thought that if I felt sorry for you I might be more willing to help.’

She put more distance between them. ‘So, you pretended. You faked being upset about your mother’s death. I thought you’d been crying but you were manipulating me all along. You just wanted me here so I could help you confirm this mad idea about your grandfather. This has nothing to do with Leia at all.’

She’d made it to the door now, took a deep breath in preparation for delivering her parting blow but he barely seemed to notice, caressing the outline of the mask with a fingertip.

‘Make sure you have your lightsaber ready next time I see you.’

She commed the Resistance the minute she was outside the ship, ploughing a path through the storm in the direction of the clearing and Leia’s body. ‘Bring the transport, I’m done here.’ Behind her, the command shuttle blazed into life, the rumble of firing engines drowning out the rain. ‘And pick me up at the grave site, he’ll be gone by the time you arrive.’

Poe’s answering hail was cheerfully smug. ‘And how did it go?’

She sighed. ‘You were right. It was a mistake.’

Rey had to ask the question twice before she could quite comprehend the stupidity of the answer. ‘Say that again – where are you having the funeral?’

Rose shot her a look from under artfully arranged hair, that seemed to have become both curlier and glossier since Rey had seen her on the graveside transport the previous night. ‘Naboo. The General’s ancestral home.’

‘She’s right you know.’ Lieutenant Connix chirped from the navigator’s chair. ‘The General’s mother was a queen. Her birth mother anyway. She met a Jedi and fell in love. Leia told me the story once, it was all very romantic.’

Rey was almost certain that Kaydel had ignored the most salient parts of that story but now was not the time to correct her. ‘We are on our way to Naboo, to hold a secret funeral right in the middle of a First Order territory? Whose bright idea was this?’

‘All the bright ideas are mine,’ breezed Poe, unconcerned. ‘Think about it, Rey. The Festival of Light has just started, it’s a massive celebration, thousands of visitors milling about, the First Order completely overwhelmed trying to boss them all around. Where better to host a major gathering than in the middle of a major gathering? No one is going to question our guests, or us. We’re hiding in plain sight.’

‘If I remember right, the Festival of Light was supposed to celebrate Naboo joining the Galactic Republic. Are you sure it’s even still happening?’

The transport dropped out of hyperspace and they immediately hit traffic, following the instructions of a stressed official squawking over the comms relay to the back of a very large queue for the temporary docking bays ringing the planet. From somewhere down below a rogue firework spiralled into a dramatic explosion of star shaped sparks.

‘I’m sure. Stop worrying and let me handle it.’ Poe tugged down the edge of his smartest jacket, turning to catch his reflection in the cockpit window.

Rey turned back to Rose. ‘And what’s the plan after we park the transport and ship the coffin down to the surface? What do you want me to do?’

Rose consulted her pad with a studious expression. ‘We’ll arrive in the capital together, but its best if everyone splits up straightaway. I don’t want to attract any more attention than strictly necessary, no matter what General Dameron says. We’re not due at the Theed Funeral Temple until early afternoon so I suggest you mingle. Go shopping. Take a boat trip on the Solleu. Look inconspicuous.’

Rey glanced down at the full set of white Jedi robes she’d been convinced into wearing for the second day in a row and wondered if inconspicuous was going to be possible.

Rose continued. ‘When we get to the ceremony you don’t have to make a speech or anything, we’ve got that covered, but I need you sitting on the stage where everyone can see you and later at the wake you might have to socialise a bit. Chat to people, let them see the lightsaber. Our supporters need to know we have a Jedi on our side, it’s good for morale.’

After a complete year of being used as a one woman publicity campaign, Rey wasn’t surprised by her role in proceedings. Rebuilding the Resistance after the disaster on Crait hadn’t been easy, and she’d seen first-hand just how effective a display of mythical power could be at loosening purse strings and softening hearts and minds, but while she did her best, Rey was not a natural diplomat. She’d found herself envying the solitude that Luke had found on his island on more than one occasion.

So when the Resistance leadership stepped off the surface transportation in the middle of Theed, she wasted no time in disappearing into the crowd. And what a crowd it was. Both sides of the river were heaving with people, the wide boulevards thronged with revellers out to shop at one of the innumerable market stalls, sample something new from a street vendor’s wares, gawk at the pleasure yachts and cruisers zipping up and down the water. The air buzzed with conversation, the lilting strains of orchestras positioned at strategic intervals drifted through the breeze and under everything wafted the strong scent of flowers. 

But there was a brittleness to the atmosphere that the festivities couldn’t quite disguise, and Rey didn’t miss the subtle signals suggesting that not everything was quite as it appeared. First Order livery was everywhere, on banners fluttering from lampposts, projected onto the side of buildings, worn as insignia on the sleeves of the guards. Stormtroopers had been stationed at every street corner and formed up into ranks in the main squares but they seemed to be under orders to watch, content that their simple presence would stop the population from revolting.

Rey browsed through the jewellery market, poking at a trinket, weighing up a bracelet in the palm of her hand. She was only killing time but the more she wandered the more she noticed the looks she was getting. One trader plucked a ring out of her grasp just as she was about to try it on, glowering at Rey until she walked away, confused. At the next stall she was met with a curt, ‘There’s nothing for you here,’ from the stall holder. At the next someone pulled curtains over the merchandise when they saw her approach, then turned their back at her polite ‘Good afternoon.’

‘People here have long memories,’ said a voice at her back and Rey turned to find an Abednedo trader standing, arms crossed at the side of a stall she was about to pass. ‘You’re a Jedi, aren’t you?’

She smiled at him, and he waved his mouth tendrils at her in a way that was probably meant to be friendly. ‘Is it so obvious?’

‘Lightsaber pretty much gives it away,’ he remarked, nodding at the weapon on her hip. ‘I thought all the Jedi were dead.’

‘I’m the only one left now.’

‘Sounds lonely,’ he replied with a sympathetic frown. ‘And these idiots aren’t helping.’ He nodded at his fellow merchants who had gone into a huddle across the way and were whispering urgently.

‘What have they got against the Jedi?’

‘Like I said, long memories. Jedi came here once, and not long after there was a war and their favourite queen got killed. They still hold memorials sometimes.’

‘I know the story.’

‘Then let me give you something to remember her by. Have this, it’s a big seller, especially now that the First Order are in charge.’ He held out a necklace engraved with a curling symbol that might have been a bird with outstretched wings, or a stylised flower. ‘The crest of the Royal House of Naboo. The queen wore it. Maybe you can wear it at her daughter’s funeral.’

Rey smiled at him. ‘Won’t you be in trouble with them?’ She nodded at the collection of merchants, who were now giving her distinctly hostile stares from across the street.

His mouth made a brushing away gesture. ‘It’s not their fault. Everyone is on edge. The Festival is a third the size it used to be before the military came, and you need the First Order’s approval for everything – the music, the speeches, even the fireworks. You can’t say anything to anyone without worrying they’re being paid to pass information to the authorities - anybody caught speaking to a Jedi would certainly be facing interrogation at the very least. Maybe even prison.’

‘I didn’t mean to cause you any trouble.’

‘You haven’t. I have a long memory too, and I remember when the Jedi fought bullies like this new emperor.’

‘I have every intention of fighting him the next chance I get.’

Rey twisted the necklace between her fingers as she sat on the raised platform and listened to the eulogies. The funeral was packed – the original hall that Rose had booked had run out of capacity very early on and the whole event had been moved to the largest chamber in the funerary complex, with some attendees still standing outside. More than a few people were crying, although others sang and laughed, or danced, according to the respective customs of their homeworlds.

The service had now reached the part where mourners could share their stories and a small queue had formed to the side of the stage. Rey didn’t know the man currently regaling the audience with an amusing anecdote about the time he had first met Leia at somewhere called Cloud City but then the General had had a network of contacts that spread amongst the stars, even though most of them had ignored her in her hour of need. The nasty part of Rey’s mind kept suggesting that most of these people were here out of guilt, having abandoned the Resistance to a lonely death on Crait and then been caught out to find it was still alive and kicking after all.

‘Rey, I need you.’ Finn was working the control room, scanning for First Order activity outside the funeral, standing ready to signal the mourners to flee should they come too close.

Rey touched the communicator in her ear, conscious of the audience. ‘Do we have company?’

‘No. But there’s a broadcast from the mole coming in as a live stream. You need to see it.’

With as much decorum as she could manage, Rey exited stage left, passing through a network of corridors into the mobile data centre that Rose had patched into the central Naboo surveillance network. Communications from the mole were always unexpected, and almost always incredibly useful. Whoever he or she was they had made initial contact while the Falcon had still been drifting through space, desperately in search of a safe harbour after the loss of Luke, and that very first message - although nothing more than a set of co-ordinates and the signature ‘from a friend’ - had started the fight back.

Of course, there had been furious arguments around whether or not the message could be trusted but Leia reasoned that it must be one of her old contacts reaching out privately having received the broadcast from her personal code. Whoever their new friend was, they were very well informed, because the co-ordinates led to a disused First Order supply facility with enough obsolete but functional weaponry to restock an army twice the size of the Resistance. There was also most of a griffin class light shuttle which Rose spent several weeks repairing, at which point it was packed full of explosives also provided by the base and then remotely piloted close enough to the Order’s frigate _Galactic Conqueror_ to blow a catastrophic hole in its side.

Then there was the coronation plot, Poe’s daring plan to put the Resistance back on the map. With the detailed location of the Supreme Leader helpfully supplied by the mole, Poe was able to co-ordinate a covert mission in which the programming of various service droids was compromised. As a result, Kylo Ren been attacked in his rooms moments before the ceremony by a detonating floor sweeper droid. The burns on his face were so extensive when he appeared live on HoloNet to be crowned nearly half an hour later than the scheduled time, Rey was sure his survival was purely an unlucky chance.

Support for the Resistance had begun to trickle in after that, but it became a flood when General Pryde’s brand new flagship, the mandator IV class siege Dreadnought _Rampager_ was extensively damaged on its maiden voyage out of the Kuat-Entralla shipyard. Since then, armed with insider knowledge about the movements of its enemy and bolstered by the groundswell of discontent amongst new First Order territories, the Resistance had surged to unparalleled levels of popularity.

‘What am I looking at?’ The screen Rey could see over Finn’s shoulder showed a grainy, black and white image so blurred that it could have been almost anything.

‘It’s been playing for a few minutes. I think it’s a live feed from a stormtrooper bodycam, but I can’t tell what planet he’s on. It’s a swamp, or a bog somewhere, I’m trying to narrow it down.’

The image cleared suddenly and Rey realised that whoever she was shadowing had stepped out from behind a tree, the end of a blaster clutched in one hand. In front of him, cutting a swathe through the poorly armed, poorly dressed, hungry looking natives was Kylo Ren. The stormtrooper got off a few shots but it was quite unnecessary. Kylo was flanked by several of his elite bodyguard, also dressed head to toe in dark clothing and brandishing a selection of lethal looking weapons.

Rey wasn’t sure if the Knights of Ren actually had individual names, certainly no one on HoloNet had ever introduced them but they’d appeared on the scene not long after Kylo had taken control, loitering in the background of every shot. They had no lightsabers and consequently she assumed they were not Force sensitive but what they lacked in power they made up for with a savage efficiency, meting out death equally to men, women and children of every species. The inhabitants of this swamp planet, wherever it was, were falling by the dozen to their blades.

Since he was masked Rey had no sense of the emotions sparked in the Supreme Leader by this latest series of murders, but the routine, unhurried way in which he wielded his lightsaber told her that this was a battle he expected to win. Rey’s host followed the attacking Knights as they mopped up the last of the paltry resistance, finally stopping at the edge of an expanse of dirty looking water, half covered by weed and scum.

‘What’s going on, Rey?’ Finn asked her, obviously expecting her to be able to divine the wiles of the Emperor from no more evidence than some shaky camera work. ‘What’s so important about this attack? Why does the mole want us to see it right now?’

‘Any guess on the location?’ Watching Kylo wade calf deep into the water and raise his hands to the sky sent warning prickles along her spine. There was something not quite right here.

‘The signal is so heavily masked I can’t get a lock on it. What’s he doing?’

‘Looks like he’s raising something from the bottom of the lake, but he seems to be talking so I don’t think he’s using the Force. Maybe he’s asking it to come out. I wish we weren’t standing so far away. Is there any way to tell this stormtrooper to get closer?’

‘The mole only speaks, he does not listen.’ Finn confirmed what she already knew. No one had any idea how to get in touch with the mole – communication was all one way.

On the screen the water bubbled, just one or two large pops at first, and then a more consistent stream of gurgling air emerged before the entire surface of the lake began to boil. Whatever was rising, it was very large. The picture became even more indistinct as the stormtrooper took several steps away.

The surface of the swamp heaved upwards, forming a circular mound for a second before the water broke, pouring away down the smooth, hairless head of what appeared to be a giant, drowned baby, eyes tight shut in its watery grave. The stormtrooper took another step back and Rey wasn’t surprised. The footage didn’t convey colour, or smell but there were patches of grey ooze down the infant’s cheeks, suppurating pustules all over one side of its head and half its ear appeared to have rotted away. Rey imagined that the thing stank.

It also had lice, from out of the ruined ear emerged a long, articulated leg, followed by another as some kind of insect unfolded itself from the aural cavity, scuttling over the skin of its host, dislodging patches of loose flesh to fall heavily into the water. When the parasite had perched itself on top of the skull it gestured with one pestilential leg, and Kylo obviously started speaking to it.

‘What’s going on? Rey?’ Poe had arrived at some point over the last few minutes and his voice sounded every bit as sick as Rey felt.

‘Some sort of conversation? A negotiation?’ On screen, the black clad figure stretched out a hand. ‘He’s using the Force. It’s an interrogation. He’s after something the creature knows.’

The scuttling bug twitched for a few brief seconds and then its legs windmilled in a blur of action as it sought the safety of its meaty cave.

‘It didn’t like that,’ Poe remarked.

Kylo’s hand tightened and the creature dropped, legs buckling under it as it fell on its back, the segments of its body thrashing in jerky, disjointed movements as it writhed on the baby’s skull.

‘Whatever it has, he really wants it.’ Finn pushed at a few buttons. ‘I’ll see if I can zoom in on the face. If it doesn’t talk, it’s going to get killed.’

The pressure on the creature released and it sagged back, waving the tip of one appendage weakly.

Kylo said something more, and the bug dragged itself painfully over the pitted skin and with one trembling leg, dug around inside the dripping pulp of the baby’s ear. When it came out again the limb cradled an object of some kind, something small, vaguely pyramid shaped. Kylo splashed further into the water, his hasty steps and the sudden urgency in his form telling Rey that this was what he had come for. His other arm shot out and the item propelled itself into his grasp.

He turned it over, pushing on the sides, then holding it in front of him as if he was concentrating. Finally, he gave it a shake and his head snapped up. The insect had nearly managed to make it back to the safety of its hidey hole, but the Force yanked it out again with such power that one of its legs was left behind.

It gestured briefly and Kylo’s fingers made a few more movements and then, projected from the tip of the device a star chart flashed into being, rotating slowly in a blur of faint blue flashes.

‘That’s a map,’ yelped Poe. ‘Save that image Finn, quick. This is what the mole wanted us to see.’

‘He’s looking for something,’ Rey whispered to herself. ‘He’s trying to find something.’

On screen, there was a satisfied nod from the Supreme Leader and he turned away, reaching the bank with a few long strides. Behind him the insect’s torment was only just beginning and it shuddered as the Force caught it, its body appearing to constrict in an invisible vice. All of its remaining limbs convulsed for a second and then, with silent shriek, the head, thorax and abdomen detached in a spray of thick liquid and the thing went still.

The camera angle panned as the stormtrooper turned, clearly preparing to follow the rest of his battalion back to whatever transport he had arrived on and the picture cut out.

‘I’ve got it.’ Finn spooled the recording backwards, freezing on the star chart cast by the pyramid. ‘Running it through the database. We’ll find a match.’

‘I’ll never step on a cockroach again.’ Poe shuddered. ‘Where do you think he’s going?’ He glanced over at Rey with a raised eyebrow.

‘Yesterday he told me Darth Vader was alive, but lost. Today he kills for a map and our mole thinks that this is so important we need to see it in real time. It’s not hard to see the connection.’ She jabbed at the screen. ‘He thinks that chart will lead him to Vader. We need to find wherever the map goes and get there first.’

Finn shook his head. ‘There’s no match in the database. Not across the known systems anyway. That arrangements of stars isn’t in our navigation computer, which means it’s somewhere in the Unknown Regions. I don’t see a destination on the chart either – even if we could work out the system we don’t know which planet or moon the map is leading to.’

‘Could we follow him? Track his shuttle?’ Rey was clutching at straws.

‘Not without knowing where it is at this exact moment – which we don’t. We’ve lost him already.’

‘Just wait a minute,’ Poe interjected. ‘Darth Vader’s alive?’

‘According to his grandson, although I’m not so sure. Either way, we can’t take the risk that he’s right. If we can’t identify the system and we can’t track his shuttle then we’re going to need to find…’ She jabbed at the pyramid frozen on the screen. ‘Another one of those.’


	3. Kneeling

‘I know a guy.’

Poe always knew a guy. Rey suspected that was partly why Leia had named him her successor, because he knew a guy in the same way that she had contacts across the galaxy.

‘He’s some hot shot smuggler, big friend of Han Solo’s apparently. He was outside a minute ago, I’ll see if I can find him.’

When the man arrived, Rey showed him the item they needed and he smiled confidently, although Rey was sure that was how he did everything. ‘It’s probably a Sith artefact, some kind of storage device like a holocron or a datacube and it’ll have a connection to the Empire.’

‘The proper Empire or the pretend one?’ asked Lando Calrissian.

‘The proper one. The Darth Vader one. It might even have a link to him somehow, he might have owned it, or left it somewhere or it might have his name on it, I don’t know. Or it might have a connection to the Unknown Regions – maybe there’s a Sith base there or something.’

Lando considered this for a minute. ‘I think I know a guy.’

Poe beamed.

‘There’s a dealer on Pasaana who specialises in all that hokey religious junk. I’ve sold him some stuff – nothing like this mind, nothing to do with Vader. If you give me a few days I can hook you up.’

‘We don’t have a few days. We’ve heard a rumour – and it’s nothing more than a rumour so don’t repeat it to anyone – that Darth Vader is alive.’

The old man’s face constricted into a scowl. ‘Then give me a few hours,’ he said.

Rey sat through the rest of the funeral formalities with an escalating sense of tension. Leia was laid to rest near the location of her mother’s grave with all the pomp and ceremony that the Resistance could muster under the oversight of a tyrannical regime and afterwards, the mourners merged with the Festival of Light crowds, leaving the First Order none the wiser. Rey couldn’t wait for it to be over.

She hadn’t placed much credence in Kylo’s bizarre vision, because in her view the likelihood of Darth Vader being alive was on a par with her ever voluntarily bearing his great grandchildren and she hadn’t seen fit to debrief the rest of the Resistance leadership about it as a result. But the deaths she had spectated on the swamp world lent a far more credible edge to the whole experience. People were dying because Kylo believed what he had seen was true. And he didn’t exactly have a good track record when it came to not falling for the temptations of evil dark side rulers. He’d murdered his father for Snoke and Rey could only imagine what new depths he would sink to in an attempt to impress Darth Vader, should his idol somehow have been magically re-incarnated.

In fact, it was far more likely that the vision she had seen was exactly the wish fulfilment that Kylo had feared it was, far more likely that he was being played for a fool. Questions as to who might want to summon Kylo Ren to the Unknown Regions and for what purpose could only be answered when she obtained a copy of the map. There was no chance of him stashing it inside a BB unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator and sending it off to hide, she was going to have to track it down on her own.

Lando Calrissian did indeed know a guy, as it transpired a few hours later, but that guy was offworld and the earliest he could make it back to Pasaana would leave them with a two standard day delay before they could even pick up the trail. Having set up the meeting, the Resistance had no choice but to return to base.

Home these days was about as far away from the desert as Rey could imagine. Ajan Kloss was as wet as Jakku had been dry, a sticky, humid heat which left skin shiny, hair limp and clothes permanently damp to the touch. For the first few weeks Rey had appreciated the contrast, but now she was as fed up with the biting insects, venomous plants and vicious wildlife as she ever had been with the sand. Making planetfall in the late afternoon she trekked through the jungle, hacking her way along the path with her lightsaber; it had only been two days since she’d left, but already the vines were taking over.

Her hut was a small, prefabricated metal box, a single room with a separate fresher and a rudimentary kitchen stashed in the corner of the combined lounge and bedroom. She hadn’t felt the need to scratch marks on the walls, but nor had she bothered to decorate in any other way. This place didn’t feel like somewhere she’d ever be staying long term, it was simply a shell which met her basic needs and nothing more. She dumped her pack on the bed, replaced the lightsaber on its rack and steeled herself for the task to come.

It was one she’d been putting off for some time, but no one else had volunteered and it was probably better to get it over with. Stopping only to throw the heavy Jedi robes back into a cupboard and don her usual leggings and tunic she made her way back out through into the forest and followed the well-worn trail to Leia’s house.

It was odd to think that there would be no more training sessions. Not yet sad, just odd. The loss of her teacher was so recent that she hadn’t yet gotten used to it, she was still half expecting to see the General limping through the trees, that peculiar look of determination on her face as she pushed through another day.

There was the clearing where she had spent days practising the ancient Jedi forms, studying the texts filched from Ahch-To to get the movements exactly right. There was the tree she’d accidentally cut in half when Leia was using a training remote to help her deploy the forms while under fire. There were the logs on which she’d honed her freezing and lifting skills and at the base of the trunk in the corner she’d healed her first wounded animal.

The empty windows of Leia’s house appeared through the trees, the vast fleshy leaves of the jungle canopy already attempting to sneak in through a badly shuttered gap. Rey pushed the door and went in, breathing in the faint perfume that still hung in the air, knowing she’d never smell it again. The dwelling was larger than Rey’s although almost as sparse, and Leia’s few personal belongings were soon collected into a pile in the middle of the bed. There were no pictures here, nothing that could hold painful memories and the loneliness that absence bespoke had Rey knocking a stray tear from her eye. She was halfway through clearing the wardrobe when the world shut up.

It took her a heartbeat to recognise what was happening, because it hadn’t happened in a year and she’d thought that connection had been severed for good. The sounds of the jungle outside the hut cut out, her breathing stilled and in a moment of complete quiet she turned and saw him.

Kylo Ren, down on one knee, head bowed, his back to her as he paid homage to something unseen in front of him. She didn’t have time to do more than draw breath before a massive weight hit her square in the chest and she was flung back against the wardrobe hard enough to black out.

It was dark when she woke, with a taste in her mouth of dried blood and her ears ringing. She was lying on the floor where she’d fallen, her back stiff from the slumped position in which she’d been thrown, a headache pounding through her skull. Groaning, she pushed herself to her hands and knees woozily, wincing as her left arm took the weight of her torso and buckled under the pressure. She explored her chest with fingertips and then peeled her tunic away from her skin to see the damage. On the left hand side of her chest, just above her heart was a circular bruise, almost black in the centre, with a halo of purple spreading over her ribs. Whoever or whatever had hit her, she’d been hit hard.

She conjured up the healing skills she’d only ever used to fix the medical problems of others, and brought the power of the light side to bear on the bruise. This was a meditation technique that had taken some time to master, a specific resonance with the Force that needed to be established before muscle and bone could be coaxed into obedience, before blood would begin to flow. She sank into the trance easily enough but when her fingertips explored the painful spot on her chest it was as if the Force had become blind. With her eyes open she could see the bruise, prod it and feel the damage but with her eyes shut the Force told her there was nothing wrong at all. For several minutes she worked, channelling the power of the universe, and when she popped open her eyelids it was as if she’d hadn’t even started.

Pushing this failure away as a consequence of the migraine rapidly developing she pushed herself to her feet and staggered in the direction of her own hut. The journey was far more difficult than it had any right to be. Lurching from tree to tree she felt permanently off balance, as if carrying a load on one shoulder that she couldn’t quite lift. As soon as she reached her hut she crashed into bed, strange patterns spangling her vision with flashes like distant stars.

A loud banging woke her. Someone was kicking at the door and the level of violence they were using suggested they’d been doing it for some time. When she touched her toes to the bare metal floor, Rey felt better than the last time she’d woken. The headache was gone and a quick check revealed that the bruise which had been so visible before had now faded into nothing. Rey frowned at it, wondering how long she’d slept.

The door gave a final shudder and Finn yelled from outside. ‘Rey! Get up. You’ve missed the Pasaana briefing already and we’re leaving in six hours. Poe says he needs you in the command centre in thirty minutes.’

She rubbed the back of her neck. Someone, somewhere, somehow, had opened the Force bond for the first time in a year. She hadn’t wanted it back. She’d admitted to herself on the moon of Utapau that she’d missed Kylo Ren, but that was in his role as an adversary – she certainly didn’t want him wandering back into her heart.

More worrying than the re-establishing of a dead connection was the scene that the connection had revealed. She’d seen him kneeling – but to whom would the Supreme Leader of the known galaxy be kneeling? Who had more power than him?

She was still considering the question when the jungle outside the window stilled, and the rest of the planet held its breath. She surged to her feet, summoned the lightsaber from its cradle. By the time he arrived it was already extended.

He materialised composed, unflustered, and obviously not in the middle of doing something else. He blinked at the lightsaber trained on his neck. ‘I didn’t come to fight. I only want to talk.’

‘And I only want to fight,’ she snarled. ‘I told you to get your lightsaber ready.’

He shrugged, unmoved. ‘I am unarmed. And I’m not going to fight you. I’m not going to fight you ever again.’

‘Unfortunate,’ she commented, and then ran her blade straight through his chest.

He glanced down, arching an eyebrow at the bright beam impaling the middle of his torso. ‘I’m still not going to fight you.’

She retrieved the weapon, having demonstrated that the conditions of the connection were unchanged and he wasn’t really standing in her lounge. ‘Then why are you here?’ She looked at him then, really looked, with her eyes and the expanded senses of her training and what she saw made her uneasy. ‘What’s happened to you?’

‘I found him, Rey. I found my grandfather.’ His tone was reverential, and the light in his eyes was different than it had been the last time they’d met. She been concerned for his sanity before, but now he appeared in control, and maybe even a little nervous.

‘Where is he?’

‘I’ll take you to meet him if you like. He already knows about you.’

She sucked in a breath. ‘He’s alive then? You’re sure?’

‘I’ve spoken to him. He was very weak, and he says he’s dying, but he’s still alive.’

She fingered the lightsaber on her belt. ‘How soon can we meet?’

‘Soon. I need to talk to you first. There are...’ He took a step towards her, thought better of it, drummed his fingers on his thigh.

He was definitely nervous. Rey had never seen him nervous before.

‘This isn’t easy. You might want to sit down.’

He was also concerned about her welfare. Rey had never seen him like that before either.

He took a deep breath. ‘I was wrong. About everything really. About my grandfather, about becoming Kylo Ren, about the dark side. I want to come back, Rey. I want to come home.’

She opened her mouth but no words came out and she plopped backwards onto a chair.

‘I know, I know,’ he rushed on. ‘It sounds like I’ve lost my mind. But I spoke to my grandfather and he wasn’t anything like I was expecting. All this time I’ve been thinking he was Darth Vader, and he wasn’t. It wasn’t Vader sending me those visions, it was Anakin Skywalker. And he said it wasn’t the darkness that would give me power, and make me into the person he’d been showing me, but the light. If I want to be whole again I have to turn back to the light. He said it wasn’t too late. He said you’d help me. You said that too, once. So I’ve come to ask for help. I need you, Rey. I need you to help me get out.’

‘Get out?’ she managed.

He gestured downwards but the actions meant more than the midnight robes he was wearing. ‘Out of the First Order. I need you to help me destroy it. And then out of the dark side. I’ve forgotten… what it’s like not to be angry all the time. I need you to show me the way, Rey. Please.’

She’d heard that tone from him before, at least. It was the same begging entreaty he’d used in the throne room and she was nearly sure he meant it. But not quite.

She gathered herself together with an effort. ‘Liar.’

He scowled at her, attempted to smooth it out and began pacing. ‘You don’t know what it’s like. All my life I’ve had to manage expectations – people around me telling me what to do, who to become. And now I’m in charge, I’m free and it’s terrifying, Rey. Terrifying. I’m completely alone, there’s no one to talk to, no one to ask. Everyone follows my orders and I don’t know what those orders should be, half the time. I just tried to do what my grandfather would have wanted, to finish what he started. But then I met him and laughed at me. Said I’d got it wrong. He said…’ There was a catch in his voice as he finished the sentence. ‘He said I’d let my mother down.’

He spun on his heel and in a few strides he was across the room, his insubstantial fingers clutching at her knees as he knelt at her feet. ‘Help me, Rey. Please.’

Then the connection faded and he was gone.


	4. Is that a dagger I see before me?

It was a request that she couldn’t refuse. Or to be more specific, it was a request that she shouldn’t refuse, because if there was any chance at all that she could neutralise the First Order by removing its leader she should take it. A war had just begun which was likely to last for years before it was concluded and many lives would be lost along the way. If Rey could save those people simply by bringing Kylo Ren into the light then she should attempt to do so, no matter what the cost.

But she hesitated. Sitting there with her heart still full of the tremulous hope in his eyes, her thoughts were mired in doubt. There had been little opportunity for observing the finer points of human nature in her short life, but she didn’t think that many people would upend their entire world view after a short conversation with a relative stranger. Surely redemption was a process that wouldn’t just happen overnight – no one just woke up in the morning and found they had become a different person. The idea that the pre-eminent dark side user in the galaxy, the leader of a militia bent on tyranny and control would suddenly decide to start playing with the good guys seemed bizarre at best, and premeditated at worst. It was possible that Leia’s death had impacted her son on some fundamental level, or that guilt over the murder of his father had finally overwhelmed him, but Rey didn’t trust either of these factors to have motivated such a change.

And there was also the question of whether he should be allowed to repent at all. He was a murderer, a war criminal, and over the last year countless injustices had been enacted in his name. Should he be offered forgiveness just because he’d changed his mind?

‘And for those who slept through the morning briefing, and then didn’t bother to turn up at the afternoon briefing, and are now sitting in the corner ignoring me, Pasaana is located in the Arkanis sector, and after we’ve dropped out of the Vaschean Way in a couple of minutes we’ll be nearly there. It’s a desert planet people – I know we’re all familiar with those but don’t get complacent. This one is known for quicksand, so watch where you’re putting your feet. The locals are Aki-Aki, you’ll spot them by the facial ganglia but our contact is an offworlder by the name of Ochi. He’s expecting us so we’re just here for the meeting and then we’re gone. Pasaana is First Order occupied but it’s just a small garrison, so if we don’t bother them, they shouldn’t bother us. Do not engage them, that’s an order. We don’t want to reveal our sources by letting them know we know what they’re up to. Rey, have you heard a single word I’ve said?’

She frowned at the General, lounging on a chair on the other side of the Falcon’s crew cabin. ‘Desert planet – I can handle it. Poe, what if we capture Kylo Ren?’

He jumped a little at that. ‘I’m not expecting him to show up but if he does I’d rather kill him than capture him. What makes you think he’s going to be on Pasaana?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t mean on Pasaana, I mean in general. What if I’m fighting him and I capture him – what happens then?’

He shrugged as if he hadn’t given the subject much thought. ‘We put him on trial and when he’s convicted we execute him, simple.’

‘But say he showed remorse. If he pleaded guilty and admitted his crimes would we still execute him then? Or just send him to the spice mines or something?’

‘We’d set him free.’ Rose was busy adjusting her sand goggles. ‘And we’d put out a broadcast on HoloNet telling everyone in the galaxy exactly when and where we were setting him free and let justice take care of itself. Imagine how many people in the galaxy have lost their families because of him – he wouldn’t last five minutes.’

‘Are you likely to try to capture him rather than kill him, then?’ Finn was giving her a curious look.

‘No. It was just a hypothetical question. Count me in for Team Slaughter. I’d better go and fetch my lightsaber just in case I do need to murder anyone today.’ She wasn’t really sure why she was cross, but her annoyance only got worse as she headed towards her bunk to find the sound of the Falcon’s engines cutting out around her again.

‘This isn’t a good time,’ she complained as Ben appeared in the middle of the corridor.

His face had held an expectant expression, but it hardened into irritation as soon as she’d finished. ‘My apologies for bothering you. How much longer do you think it’ll be before you decide whether to help me or not?’

‘I don’t know, I’m busy right now.’ She kept the volume low to avoid any of the Resistance overhearing this conversation.

‘Busy with what? What could be more important than this? Where are you? We need to meet.’

‘Why do you need to know where I am?’

‘Because I told you things I’ve never told anyone else and you’ve made me wait eight and a half hours for an answer. And now you’re too busy. Tell me where you are.’ He took a step forward.

She wasn’t worried about being threatened by a projection. ‘I’m with the Resistance. If I tell you where I am you’ll turn up with a fleet and kill us all.’

His eyes narrowed. ‘You don’t trust me. After all that I said.’

‘Of course I don’t trust you,’ she hissed. ‘You can’t just turn up in my sitting room, tell me you’re sorry and expect me to say it’s all going to be alright. It isn’t. Even if you’re telling the truth – and quite frankly I’m not convinced – how do you expect this is going to play out? You leave the First Order and join the Resistance? I don’t see it, I’m sorry.’

‘I never said I wanted to join the Resistance. And I never said I was sorry either, I said I was wrong. But now I’m starting to regret I said anything at all. Where are you? I need to see you right now.’ He took another few paces forward, stopped well within striking distance.

She had nothing with which to strike him, and even if she had it wouldn’t have made any difference given that he wasn’t actually there. ‘This is all a trick to get me to tell you where I am. You’re pretending to be weak so I’ll trust you – I fell for that before, and I’m not falling for it again. Go away.’

His face grew darker and he took another pace, managing to loom over her in the bright illumination of the corridor. ‘It isn’t a trick. I knew exactly where you were on Utapau’s moon and I made no attempt to harm you then. I’m coming to see you Rey, whether you want me to or not.’

She threw up her hands to push him away and he moved at the same time, grasping for her neck as the bond snapped with an almost audible click. She slumped against the wall, breathing hard.

Finn’s voice called from the cabin. ‘Everything all right?’

‘Absolutely fine.’ It was only when she caught her reflection in the airlock viewport as the Resistance prepared to disembark that she realised the necklace she’d been given on Naboo was missing.

The capital of Pasaana turned out to be a city made entirely of tents. Nestled within a cluster of rock formations the washed out colours of the tired looking dwellings gave the impression that the settlement had simply been swept into place like detritus from a storm and was still awaiting clean up. Rey was keen to leave as quickly as possible, not because the heat and the wind reminded her of Jakku, but because she couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen her necklace and that made her profoundly uncomfortable. It just wasn’t possible for physical objects to pass through the bridge between herself and Ben, because if it were he’d be dead already, but that knowledge didn’t seem to be helping. He’d swiped at her neck and now her necklace was missing, and he’d seemed quite determined to find out where she was.

‘We’re here to see Ochi.’ Four members of the Resistance landing party looked expectantly at the short and hairy humanoid behind the counter. ‘We’re here about the Sith artefacts.’

The little man wrung all four of his hands and affected a confused expression. ‘Sith artefacts? Ochi has no Sith artefacts. Very powerful they would be, and very banned. Ochi doesn’t deal in such things. Ochi can show you other items though, very holy, very rare.’

Poe frowned at him. ‘We’re not with the First Order. We’re the Resistance - Lando Calrissian sent us.’

‘Ochi knows no one of that name. Ochi is a simple trader, he knows nothing of politics, or of the Resistance. He keeps his business out of such things.’

‘Ochi is expecting us, we have an appointment.’

‘And plenty of money,’ Finn clarified, clearly reasoning that this argument would help.

‘Ochi did not know who the appointment was with. Unfortunately, Ochi is busy, and all appointments have been cancelled. Ochi regrets that he is not able to assist.’

Poe rolled his eyes, gestured at the counter. ‘Rey.’

She sighed heavily, made a tiny movement with one finger. ‘You will take us to the Sith artefacts.’

‘I will take you to the Sith artefacts,’ the shopkeeper repeated, his eyes glazing. ‘Follow me.’

Rey was expecting the items they needed to be stored in a back room somewhere but Ochi appeared to have been more careful than any of them would have guessed. They trailed the little man to the back of his tent where a small cargo skiff waited, tethered to a landing spike. Swinging himself up into the pilot’s seat Ochi waited until all four of his customers were strapped in behind him and then paused, his hands on the controls.

‘You will take us to the Sith artefacts,’ Rey reminded him and he smiled faintly and set off.

After an hour of rocketing at top speed through the desert heat Rey wished she’d paid attention to Poe’s briefing and had brought more water with her than a single canteen. Cocooned behind her goggles, with her hair tucked up into a sensible cap and swathed in beige desert fatigues Rose appeared in her element, but both Finn and Poe were sporting sweat soaked shirts. Another half an hour brought them to the base of a cluster of the dull red cliffs that made up the bedrock of Pasaana and the skiff was hooked to a docking ring set into the wall that was so well camouflaged it was almost invisible.

‘You will take us to the Sith artefacts.’ Rey got in first, before Ochi could stop once again.

He nodded, approached the rock wall and laid one of his palms on a hidden reader behind a twist of sandstone. A clanking, grinding sound emerged from deep within the formation and an irregular shaped hole appeared low down in the bluff face, low enough that kneeling would be required to gain access. Ochi didn’t hesitate, dropping to his many hands and knees and slipping into the crawl space with alacrity. Rey followed, in case her mind control should require another top up and followed the dealer’s hairy backside down the narrow passage.

Although the floor of the tunnel was sand, it was cool out of the sun and the drop in temperature was a welcome relief. Rey could tell that her cheeks were going to be sunburned after this adventure was over, because even in the semi darkness they were still hot. It was only a few paces through the crawlspace before the tunnel opened out into a much wider cavern, and Ochi reached out to activate glow panels hidden in the walls.

Rey studied the assembled merchandise in awe. ‘You will stand here and not be a nuisance,’ she murmured as the other members of the Resistance exited the tunnel.

‘I will stand here and not be a nuisance,’ Ochi repeated.

‘Don’t you ever try that on me,’ Poe remarked, brushing sand off his trousers. ‘Hell, look at this place.’

It was apparent from the items on the racks and racks of shelving, the various statues, weapons and ancient equipment positioned on the floor that this was not so much a shop as a museum. Rey turned in a circle attempting to take it all in. She’d had no idea there were so many Sith relics still left in the galaxy, let alone that they all might have been collected in one place. She had a new respect for Ochi and perhaps a little more fear as well - he must have a deep and longstanding interest in the traditions of the Sith order to have acquired all its history, although she’d felt no form of Force sensitivity from his mind.

She wandered towards one of the many shelves of holocrons and selected one at random. It buzzed and stirred in her hand, like a fly trapped in a jar and she could feel its resistance to her touch. She replaced it, moved over to another section and picked up a dagger, engraved with markings in a language she couldn’t read. Returning it, she drifted on to a rack of lightsabers, tracing the bent outline of a slim, reticulated saberstaff with antique casing.

From behind her, Finn said, ‘Well?’

‘Well what?’

‘Which one do we need?’

Rey shrugged, clipping the weapon to her belt absently. ‘I have no idea. I’m not a Sith. These things don’t speak to me.’ Even as she said it she was aware that this was a lie. To her, to the senses she had spent the last year honing, this whole room was alive. There were things in the shadows that had woken up when they felt her approach, as aware of her power in the light as she was aware of their grounding in the dark.

They would answer to her, she felt, if she only called in the right way.

‘I thought the Force was just a personal choice?’ Rose sounded impatient. ‘Some people choose the light and some choose the dark and some go from one to the other, like Kylo Ren. Can’t you just think like the other side for a bit?’

‘We’ve already been here longer than I was expecting Rey, and it’s more than an hour back to the Falcon. We don’t have a lot of time left.’ Poe’s voice was worried.

She nodded, stretched out her hand, and opened her mind. There were eyes, eyes in the darkness, watching her. She could feel the brush of their attention like an insect crawling over her skin. Faint chittering filled the shadows. She breathed, focused as she had been taught and then there it was. A presence, lurking somewhere outside, trying to find her and growing closer by the second. She reached out towards it, feeling on an instinctual level that this was what she sought, this was what she had been missing. She drew it closer, wrapped the strands of her power around it and pulled it in. _I am here,_ she told it. _Come and find me_.

_I am coming_, it answered. _I am coming. _

She walked towards that thread of connection, nurtured it inside her, felt it become more solid and familiar with every passing step. Her fingers reached into the empty air, grasping. _So close_, _so close_.

‘Er, Rey?’ Finn’s voice shattered her reverie a split second before she crashed straight into the wall.

‘Ouch.’ She peeled her eyes open to find she was back where she started - at some point she’d walked away from the Sith archive and was now pressing her nose against the rock wall right above the tunnel through which they’d climbed. ‘I don’t understand. I could feel something. It was getting closer.’ She concentrated, centred herself in the Force and then – ‘It’s still here. It feels right. It’s what I’ve been looking for. We need to go this way.’

‘Are you sure?’ Rose didn’t sound convinced. ‘That’s the way out.’

Rey ignored her, scrambled back through the passageway following the directions of the Force. The sudden light and heat of the desert on the other side of the rock blinded her momentarily as she emerged into the blaze of the Pasaana star. There was a scrabbling noise as one by one the Resistance clambered out of the cave.

‘Oh, shit,’ yelped Poe.

‘What the fuck are they doing here?’ Finn had also been surprised into swearing.

Rose just said, ‘Rey? Rey?’ There was something accusatory in her tone.

Rey was transfixed by the broad, dagger shaped outline of a Star Destroyer hovering a slight distance away in the direction from which the skiff had come. The whine of approaching TIE fighters hurt her ears. ‘He’s here,’ she said.


	5. Flight of the Falcon

‘Everybody move,’ Poe yelled, the first to regain his composure. ‘Finn, get Ochi out of that cave. Rose, unhook the skiff and fire up the engines. Rey, how did you know?’

Rey was still listening to the Force more than to her companions, unable to understand how it could have led her so astray. Ben was here somewhere, and rapidly getting closer; she’d sensed him even though his whereabouts had been a mystery until something had connected them again a few days ago. She had a nasty suspicion that through the Force she’d told him exactly where she was.

Poe grabbed her by the upper arms and shook her hard. ‘Rey, he’s here isn’t he? Kylo Ren. How did you know he’d be on Pasaana? You said it back on the Falcon and now here he is. Is he tracking you? Are you talking to him again?’

Not for the first time Rey wished she’d kept the Force enabled conversations she’d had with her enemy before Luke died a secret. She nodded dumbly.

He gave her a final shake. ‘Why didn’t you say so? We’re going to have words about this.’

Ochi and Finn emerged into the sand, the former blinking rapidly and attempting to haul one of his arms out of Finn’s grip. ‘What is Ochi doing here?’ He squawked as he looked up to see the might of the First Order navy occupying the atmosphere. ‘Flee, Ochi must flee!’

‘Couldn’t have put it better myself.’ Poe jumped onto the skiff, forcibly removing the shopkeeper from the driver’s position. ‘I’m the pilot. Everybody on. Maybe they haven’t seen us yet. We might be able to hide in one of the canyons. Rey – move.’

She shook her head. ‘I’m not going. This is my fault. I’ll cause a distraction and give you time to get away. I’ll meet you back at the Falcon.’ She unclipped her saber, turning in the direction of the open sand and beginning a slow jog into the middle of the desert.

Finn’s call came back over the roar of the accelerating engines. ‘Remember, don’t capture him, kill him.’

It was silent this far out in the desert. The ion engines that she’d heard on exiting the cave had all faded away, as the TIE fighters sped after the departing Resistance craft. Rey had stopped running, knowing that no matter how far away she went he’d find her anyway. It was a while before the rush of air and the faint hum of engines signalled his approach. This ship was quieter than the standard First Order craft. She focused on her breathing, hearing the gentle pull and push of the air in her lungs above any other distraction. She was dimly aware of the fighter whizzing towards her over the sand but she ignored it.

Breathe. Was that what Leia had said? Or had that been Luke? Both, most likely.

She breathed, and then with the Force, flipped up and backwards into the air, bringing the lightsaber down in a long, slow arc that sliced through the top of both wings before the swing was complete and she landed lightly on her feet, back on the sand. The TIE fighter immediately began to struggle, shaking as its stabilisers attempted to cope with the missing parts of its structure before giving up and sending the whole ship twirling gracelessly nose first into the sand. Rey stood and waited.

The red glow of the Pasaana star threw shadows across his face as he scrambled out of the wreckage, black cloak swirling in a stark counterpoint to the light with which he was surrounded. He stomped towards her over the intervening desert, gesticulating wildly and it was so quiet that his words reached her easily. ‘What did you do that for? I wasn’t firing at you.’

She ignited her lightsaber.

‘I’m not going to fight you. Put the lightsaber away.’

She adopted an opening stance, cycled through the rest of the form carefully and calmly while she waited, remembering to breathe.

‘Ataru. Good choice, if you know how to jump like that. Who taught you?’

She returned to her opening stance, ready and waiting. ‘Did you steal my necklace and use it to track me here?’

‘Yes.’

‘How?’

‘Put the lightsaber down and I’ll tell you.’

‘Is that Star Destroyer capable of recording this conversation from that distance?’

‘They don’t record my private conversations.’

‘But don’t you think it will look suspicious if we’re standing here chatting instead of fighting? Maybe they’ll think you’re trying to defect.’

He sighed. ‘Fine, I’ll fight you. But whatever happens next it’s your fault.’

The red flame jumped into life in his hand and she braced for an assault. The first swing of his blade was slow, clearly signalled but as she moved to block it his off hand gestured in the periphery of her vision and her weapon catapulted out of her grasp. In the seconds it took for her to summon it back he slid inside her guard, tossing his own sword carelessly to the sand and grabbed her wrist, yanking it up until her palm met his cheek with a light slap.

An immediate thrum of pain lanced through her chest and before she could react to that he was leaning forward into her space, far too close for comfort. ‘Read my mind. It’s the only way you’re going to trust me. Go on. I’ll let you in.’

He smelt faintly of singed wiring. The desert wind whipped his hair into his eyes but his attention didn’t falter; she read no dishonesty in his steady gaze, but then, he’d fooled her before. She yanked her hand away, held it out to catch the flying lightsaber.

‘I’m never going to trust you. You brought a fleet to kill me, exactly like I said you would. Defend yourself, or I will kill you.’

He leaned back and folded his arms, unimpressed. ‘You would never attack an unarmed man.’

She held the blade to his throat. ‘Try me.’

He didn’t so much as blink. ‘Into every generation the Force is born, its potential existing in thousands of individuals who may find their way to the light side or the dark and learn the ways of its power. But sometimes, that balance is destroyed and the number of Force users falls to a handful. Sometimes, it falls to two. Always one from the light and one from the dark and when that happens all the wasted capability of those thousands of other people concentrates in these two. They are equal, they balance. Neither one can destroy the other, although they may try.’

She wasn’t expecting him to move and she didn’t react quickly enough when he did. He stepped forward, right into the path of her blade and she both saw and smelt his skin smoulder as the tip of her lightsaber burned into the base of his neck. A blinding flash of agony exploded in her chest, and her vision blurred with it, shudders wracking her shoulders as the pain ripped through her body. She dropped the blade, bent over, gasping.

He continued as if he were impervious to such physical irritations. ‘Together, the power they wield is greater than either may call on alone. The Force binds them, concentrates within them. Together, they are unstoppable.’

She glanced up, the pain passing as swiftly as it had come. ‘Is that what Vader told you?’

He nodded. ‘And more besides.’

She straightened, picking up her weapon but making no attempt to strike him again. ‘Then I understand why you’re here. These Force twins…’ she waggled a hand dismissively.

‘Force couple,’ he corrected.

‘Force captives,’ she continued firmly. ‘Are bound together, they can’t escape each other because there isn’t anyone else with the same power left in the universe.’

‘But that power is unlimited.’

‘And your theory is that when your mother died, that left us as the last two Force users in the galaxy, and we’re now linked somehow? Joined as some kind of team?’

‘Rather more than that. We are the living embodiment of the Force, and with it we can do anything.’

She put her hands on her hips. ‘So, you’re pretending to have converted to the light side so that you can deceive me into giving you, Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order, ruler of the galaxy, even more power than you already have?’ She clipped her lightsaber to her belt, wondering why there now seemed to be two at her waist. ‘I think not.’

‘You fail to understand,’ he snapped. ‘Again. There is no light side or dark side for us – we are above such things.’

‘And you fail to understand that there is no ‘us’.’

It was going to be a long walk back to the Falcon with no transport, and she was apprehensive about what she’d find when she got there. It was likely that the Resistance had been captured, or killed, given the complement of that ship – stormtroopers were probably overrunning Pasaana by now. The best she could hope for was that Poe and the others had managed to hide somewhere, and could keep evading the First Order until such time as she found them and they could work out how to escape.

The sand shifted behind her under the pressure of heavy boots and a large hand yanked at hers. ‘Then prove it,’ he hissed in her ear. ‘Prove that there’s no connection between us and we can go back to fighting each other.’

She glanced at his hand in disdain. ‘And how do you suggest I do that?’

This was clearly the wrong answer. He pointed up at the Star Destroyer. ‘That isn’t a fleet. It isn’t even a ship. It’s a demonstration. That’s why I brought it.’

The handholding was making her uncomfortable. His hand was too big, and his fingers were too warm and they were wrapped around hers as if they belonged there. She was conscious that someone on the Star Destroyer was probably recording this little tableau to laugh about later. His grip tightened and made it all worse.

‘Could you move that ship on your own?’ he asked, a thread of excitement now evident in his words.

She shook her head.

‘Neither could I. It’s possible in theory but there’s a mental barrier I can’t break. It’s too big, too heavy. Now, let’s try to move it together.’

‘Which way?’

He gave her a sideways look, attempting to gauge the level of sarcasm in her tone, then shrugged. ‘Left?’

She raised her free hand in a parody of control, waited a few seconds, and then dropped it again. ‘Oh dear, it doesn’t work. Let me go.’

But he didn’t answer. She flicked a glance up to see his eyes were closed and his hand was out but after a brief moment she realised that wasn’t all she could see. There was something else behind his features, something restless and swirling, something strong. The air around his form appeared to be bending in a way that had nothing to do with the desert heat. She closed her eyes and concentrated, properly this time, brought the otherworldly senses that had taken such effort to hone into effect.

It was so faint she almost missed it. A little pulse of something shimmering in her impressions of the Force, dancing just out of sight, beyond her reach. It was a gentle, fleeting thing, not the sledgehammer of power his words had conjured up in her mind. This was delicate, graceful, neither light or dark and she had no idea how he had ever thought it might be strong enough to move a starship.

There was a sigh beside her, a faint curse and the grip on her hand was released. Before she could open her eyes he moved, his arms wrapping around her waist, her back pulled tight against his chest and she was enveloped by him. He surrounded her, smothered her, the sheer weight and bulk of him solid in her consciousness; he lowered his face and his breath was hot against her neck. But the dancing thing steadied, drew on the wall of power now braced firm against her spine and it sharpened, strengthened, made itself ready. Without looking, she raised her arm, conscious that Ben’s arm was moving at the same time and there was a rush of power that thrilled along every nerve ending she possessed, leaving her trembling with exhilaration.

She said, ‘Left.’

‘Look,’ he breathed.

In the sky above, the Star Destroyer was moving. Slowly, ponderously, it obeyed the joined arms pointed at it from the planet below, and, with a flash of warning lights and a faint blare of sirens, it shifted sideways.

Rey felt the power drain out of her as her concentration frayed, distracted by the enormity of what she had done. What they had done, together. Behind her, he straightened, his chin brushing into her hair as his arms tightened on her waist in some kind of hug.

She broke free with an effort and when she faced him he bore an expression she recognised from a vision. ‘Still want to fight me?’ he asked, with a lift to the corners of his lips and a lightness around his eyes that wasn’t usually there.

‘I…that...’

‘I know,’ he said. ‘I know.’

‘We could have crashed it.’

He gave a dismissive shrug. ‘You wouldn’t have let me crash it. It felt like you were in control. You’re the pilot, I’m just the engine.’

‘But if we can do that, what else can we do?’

A smile flickered briefly and he held out his hand. ‘Do you want to find out?’

She crossed her arms, nodded at his fingers. ‘It seems to require slightly more in the way of physical contact than that.’

That smile again, tentative and fleeting. ‘I’d noticed. So you believe me now? You trust me?’

A movement at the limits of her vision stilled the reply on her tongue. Over the capital of Pasaana the Star Destroyer was manoeuvring itself back into position, and once it had finished a bright blue light emerged from the undercarriage, spotlighting something on the ground. She wasn’t too far away to see what the tractor beam had picked out, and was now lifting into the hangar. A small ship, far too small to be any threat to the behemoth about to swallow it, with a round profile interrupted by two distinctive arms.

‘No!’ It was a yelp of outrage. ‘You can’t take the Falcon.’

‘I think I legally own it.’

She spluttered at the cheek of it. ‘You planned this. You planned this whole thing – the ship and the Force and the… the hugging – you set me up.’

‘We’ve just accomplished miracles together, we’ve discovered a power that almost no one has ever possessed and you’re worried about a piece of junk I’m going to melt into slag the minute I get back on board? Hux has standing orders to capture that ship and all its crew the minute it’s spotted. I doubt he even knows you’re here.’

‘You do. If you’re on my side then call the First Order and get them to release that ship right now. If you want me to trust you then prove where your loyalties lie.’

He looked from her up to the Falcon, making its stately entrance into the belly of the beast, and then back to her again. ‘I’d prefer it if you asked me to prove it some other way.’

‘Fine,’ she snapped. ‘Fine. Then in that case I’ll help you destroy the First Order, and I’ll help you turn from the dark side, and I’ll trust every single word you say if you declare a truce.’

‘Pardon?’

‘You heard. Declare a truce. Ask the Resistance for peace. Put an end to the war and I’ll even hold your hand again.’

He opened his mouth, shut it again without saying anything at all.

‘I thought not.’ She stomped away from him across the sand.


	6. Kylo Ren's bedroom

To the extent that Rey had been raised, she’d been raised in a desert. However, any stranger who happened to be passing at that exact moment would not have divined this, because she was exhibiting none of the common behaviours of the desert dweller. For a start, she was walking outside, in the full glare of the sun, with no shade, carrying no water, and without transport or a link to the nearest friendly habitation. After two hours of walking she had begun to hallucinate, which was why she didn’t immediately register that her transponder was receiving.

‘Black Leader to White Knight. White Knight – do you copy?’

The flood of relief that ran through her at these words would have brought a tear to her eyes, had they not been so dry. ‘Copy Black Leader. Is this channel secure?’

There was a pause on the line. ‘It is now. Where the hell are you? What happened?’

‘Can you lock onto my comm signal?’ she asked. ‘I’m somewhere in the middle of the desert. Where are you?’

‘On a First Order assault shuttle in orbit. Where else?’

‘And how did you get there?’

It was Finn’s voice that replied. ‘Turned out Ochi was packing a batch of contraband sniper rifles. I managed to take out the cockpit window of a TIE fighter with one of them and when it crashed it wasn’t too badly damaged, so Rose fixed it up and Poe flew it back to the stormtrooper disembarkation point.’

‘Where,’ the pilot himself cut in. ‘I exchanged it for an empty assault craft, came back to pick up the others and now we’re just hanging around in space, broadcasting a cloaking signal, waiting to collect you.’

‘Rey,’ Finn was back on the mic again. ‘Did you kill Kylo Ren?’

‘About that,’ said Poe, in his best menacing tone. ‘You and I are going to have words.’

As it turned out, those words were mostly ‘wow’ and ‘what’ as Rey recounted the encounters she’d had with the tyrannical madman at the head of the opposition.

‘Let me get this straight.’ Poe was sporting his best confused look, all crinkled eyebrows, wrinkled nose and crunched up forehead. ‘Kylo Ren is going to declare a truce and join the Resistance and you’ve learned how to move Star Destroyers with your mind. That was a busy couple of hours.’

‘He doesn’t really want to defect. He’s either lying to me, or he’s telling the truth and someone is lying to him. I trusted Master Luke. I don’t believe that Darth Vader is alive and nothing his grandson has told me so far gives me any reason to change my mind. Our first objective has to be to find whoever or whatever Kylo went to meet in the Unknown Regions.’

‘So – you can’t move a Star Destroyer with your mind? He was lying about that?’ Finn was also confused.

‘He wasn’t lying about that. When the two of us work together we have more power than when we’re alone – but that’s hardly a revelation.‘ She crashed her fist into her thigh for emphasis. ‘We need to find Darth Vader and destroy him.’

‘But first, we need to get the Falcon back.’ The nods Rose and Finn gave this statement indicated they agreed with Poe.

Rey sighed. ‘I’m not sure how. Kylo seemed quite determined to keep it. It may already be in pieces.’

‘We could contact the mole,’ Rose offered, although she didn’t sound very hopeful.

‘The mole only speaks, he does not listen,’ intoned Finn.

‘That doesn’t mean we give up.’ Poe bent forward. ‘We’re on a First Order shuttle and we know the Falcon is on a Star Destroyer. If they haven’t turned off the tracker we can still work out where it is, and then all we need to do is fly this thing into the hangar bay, swap ships and fly the Falcon out.’

‘Where are we going to get the clearance codes to get close enough to dock the shuttle? Without the codes they’ll blast us into smithereens. And even if we sort that bit, how do we stop the First Order from shooting on the Falcon when we’re trying to leave?’ Finn replied.

‘Details,’ Poe said firmly. ‘Let’s just see if we can track it first.’

For many hours long range scans showed no trace of the Millennium Falcon and when it did eventually pop up, it was orbiting Coruscant, which was probably the most difficult place in the galaxy near which to arrange a daring, high profile raid.

‘There.’ Rose stabbed the image she’d frozen on HoloNet. ‘The only First Order vessel orbiting Coruscant is the flagship. It’s a mega class Star Dreadnaught, Kylo Ren’s capital ship, built to replace the _Supremacy_. According to the news, there’s some sort of parade on the planet scheduled for tomorrow – it’s a celebration of thanks where the galaxy is supposed to line up to praise the First Order for conquering it. Can’t imagine it’ll be well attended.’

Poe’s eyes shone. ‘We can turn this to our advantage. All the First Order leadership will be planetside, they won’t be expecting an attack. We can sneak in, blow up the Dreadnaught and escape on the Falcon. That’ll give everyone something to celebrate.’

‘We’re going to blow up a Dreadnaught with an assault shuttle? I don’t think so. There’s no way they’re going to let an unidentified ship dock. We’ll be blown up before we can even get close,’ Finn pointed out for the second time.

‘We’ll use Rey’s new powers to move the cannon fire out of our way.’

‘My new powers only work when I’m touching Kylo Ren and I don’t particularly want to touch him ever again.’

‘This story just keeps on getting better. Where were you touching him before?’

Rose tapped a fingernail loudly on her pad. ‘Or we could just use the shield slicer code the mole has just sent us.’

Poe jumped off his seat. ‘I could kiss that guy.’

‘You realise this means ‘that guy’ is part of the First Order.’

‘You always say that, Rey. But he could just be an altruistic code breaker. Either way, when I meet him, I’m going to kiss him.’

‘Unless this is all a trap, and the First Order have been feeding us scraps of information to lure us in, until we become so gullible we fly right on board their Dreadnaught and let them capture us. In that case he’ll probably kill you rather than kiss you.’

‘There wouldn’t be a Resistance without him. Have a little faith. And in any case, you’re forgetting one important thing.’ Poe stopped, wearing his most smug expression. ‘That’s Kylo Ren’s ship we’re going to break into and he won’t be on board. Unless he carries that star chart everywhere he goes – and I bet he doesn’t because he’s already used it once – then it’s going to be on that ship. We’ll rescue the Falcon. You go to the Supreme Leader’s quarters and find the map.’

‘I don’t like this plan,’ Rey commented, and not for the first time.

The pilot and co-pilot – both dressed in stormtrooper outfits from the Resistance’s extensive costume department – ignored her. Finn was still smarting about having to wear the outfit in the first place, and Poe was concentrating too hard for another argument.

They were the only three members of the Resistance now on board the assault shuttle. They’d hitched a ride from Pasaana in the back of a Resistance craft and the shuttle was on its final approach into the mega class Star Dreadnaught _New Empire_, preparing to deploy the code which would punch through the ship’s shields and allow them to dock unnoticed.

The shuttle itself and its stormtrooper crew would not look out of place in the hangar and it should be an easy task to locate the Falcon, remove any First Order tech and ready it for departure, using the same slicing code on the way out.

Connix was leading a small Resistance cell on the surface of Coruscant, keeping an eye on the First Order leadership to ensure they didn’t head back to the Dreadnaught before the Resistance had left. Rose stood by to patch a live feed of the Falcon escaping the Dreadnaught, pausing to fire a couple of token shots into its hull and then getting the hell away, on HoloNet. Even Poe had accepted that the chances of destroying the larger vessel were slim to none, but it was the spectacle he wanted, rather than reality.

Rey’s only task was to find Kylo Ren’s bedroom.

‘I really don’t like this plan,’ she grumbled again, although she knew she was unlikely to get another opportunity to search for the map in enemy headquarters.

‘Hit it, Finn.’ Poe made the final adjustments to his docking trajectory.

Finn pushed a thin storage card containing the necessary sequences into a slot on the control panel and there was absolute silence as they both held their breath.

From a distance, the Dreadnaught blotted out the starlight, an impenetrable block of metal floating in space, but close up Rey could see it was riddled with holes. Smaller craft manoeuvred into its massive hangars and turbo laser exit ports pockmarked the surface. Banks of missile batteries pointed their blunt noses into space waiting for a target but the assault shuttle slipped silently between the gaps in the Dreadnaught’s defences and entered the heart of the First Order ship unchallenged. There was just time to breathe once in relief, before the automatic landing sequence kicked in and the shuttle was directed towards an empty pad.

‘Remember,’ Finn’s voice crackled through the modulator in his helmet. ‘When we leave the ship don’t stop walking, and if anyone asks, say you’ve been told to report for debriefing.’

Poe’s white head nodded. ‘Rey, you’ll have an hour. Don’t get caught.’

The two of them popped the cargo doors and marched in perfect unison off the shuttle, leaving Rey to slip quietly down the ramp and join the ranks of officers heading for the passenger decks. She too was in disguise, but calculating that access to the senior leadership’s private quarters would be restricted, she was wearing a uniform of the highest rank available within the Resistance’s stores, her hair tucked under a severe cap. She affected a military formality, all stiff shoulders and clicking heels, swinging her arms to hide the fact that there was a lightsaber up her sleeve.

This wasn’t the first time she’d been on a Dreadnaught and the partial schematics the Resistance had been able to obtain from the wreck of the _Supremacy_ led her to believe that the Supreme Leader’s personal quarters would be located near to the throne room. She stopped the lift on the floor beneath the one on which she’d exited last time, and turned to her left to face a long, black corridor, very much like all the other long, black corridors on the ship, although this one was empty and led only to a single door at the end.

The Force was an efficient lock pick and she stepped into the apartment with alacrity, sealing the entrance behind her so that no one else could get in. Then she turned around.

The rooms were large, but sparsely furnished, impersonal, and it was only when Rey finally spotted an empty lightsaber rack on a table that she was certain she was in the right place. A beat of excitement thrilled across her nerves, sending tremors though her heart at the thought of being alone in his secret space before she quashed it sternly. There was no room for excitement here, no illicit pleasure to be gained at seeing her reflection in the same mirror in which he shaved in the morning, or feeling the softness of the pillow on which he laid his head at night.

She shook her head to clear it, yanked down the hem of the uncomfortable uniform and made for the large desk in the far corner of the living room. She soon decided that she had no time for order. Instead of carefully rifling through the assorted pads and data cubes which littered the surface and spilled out of the drawers, she simply tipped everything out of the desk onto the floor and pawed through it by hand. The rest of the room contained a dining table and chairs, a hard-looking sofa and a full size comms relay, none of which concealed the pyramid she was looking for. The walls were flat, bare of storage so she headed for the bedroom and opened a wardrobe hidden behind a shiny, black panel.

Another quick rill of excitement trickled through her veins at the sight of his clothes, neatly ordered, hanging in rows and almost all identical, before she systematically yanked them out of the closet one by one, patting them down for hidden pockets. Spare boots were upended, cloaks shaken and an entire underwear drawer tipped out on the floor and kicked through and still the map eluded her. The bed was next, the tight press of the black sheets across the mattress ruined as she stripped them away, the mattress itself levitated off the frame and tossed onto the floor. On either side of the bed were cupboards built into the wall and she’d just pulled open the first of them when the quiet seclusion of his apartment stilled into the dead calm of the Force bond.

‘This is a really, really bad time.’ She attempted to sound casual as she fingered through a stash of smaller holopads, an actual book, a spare chronometer, an empty glass, a portable glow panel.

‘Did you find it?’ the owner of the room asked from behind her, far too calm to be aware of her location. ‘Whatever it is you’re looking for.’

‘Not yet,’ she replied grimly. ‘But I will.’

Keeping her back to him she hopped through the empty frame to loot the cabinet on the other side of the bed. There were even slimmer pickings in this one. A hairbrush, a box, a bottle of perfume. She sniffed it curiously. Familiar, but not his. Standing, she put her hands on her hips, surveying the footprint of the room, wondering if there might be storage hidden in the floor.

‘Where are you?’ His voice was slightly closer now, and there was an edge to it that hadn’t been there before.

‘On the Resistance base,’ she lied. ‘I’ve lost a book.’

‘Then why are you wearing a First Order uniform?’ His tone was hard now, suspicious.

She glanced down, cursing the fact that while he couldn’t see her surroundings he could still see enough to spot what she was wearing. ‘I’ve decided to defect,’ she snapped. ‘I’m on my way to enlist at the nearest recruiting station.’

It was time to leave. The map she sought wasn’t here, he must have it safe on his shuttle, maybe stashed in the same drawer as that stupid helmet – she’d been an idiot to think he might not be carrying it around with him. She stalked in the direction of the doors, tripping over discarded clothes and brushing past his insubstantial form.

Which reached out to grab her arm.

It took her a moment to realise that he had, in fact, grabbed her arm and was gripping it hard enough to hurt. Uncomprehending, she extended a finger, raised it slowly and stabbed it at the middle of his chest. Her finger met flesh and bone and did not pass through.

‘You’re really here,’ she breathed, searching his darkening face for meaning. ‘You can travel through the Force.’

He glanced around the room, taking in the significant amount of mess she’d caused and his expression tightened even more. ‘And you’re really here. On my ship. In my room.’ He shook her, hard. ‘How did you get on board? Who helped you? Who else are you with?’

Her mind went white. She had a split second to give him an answer before he triggered a shipwide alarm. Finn and Poe would be captured, imprisoned and tortured and would reveal the existence of the mole, who would be similarly vulnerable. Rey herself was probably looking at a short lightsaber battle following by a lengthy incarceration, since he wouldn’t be able to kill her without severely injuring himself in the process. She had only one option.

She flung her arms around his neck and kissed him.

As a diversion, it was ineffective, because he simply stood there, unyielding in her embrace, eyes wide, while she slammed hers closed and scrabbled for the ribbons of power that bound them together. She felt him move, prepare to step away but she latched onto the flighty, fluttering sensation that represented her power and forcibly joined it to the raw strength of the body in front of her. The connection was instantly made, and much more powerful than last time, the sudden rush of it blowing her backwards until his hand settled on her waist, holding her in place.

She had no illusions about her abilities as a seductress – she had never kissed anyone before in her life – if this was going to work he’d have to want to be distracted. She grappled blindly for his hand, laced his fingers through hers and brought the power of the Force to bear. The link between them surged in response, a tornado of waiting energy but it wasn’t the blunt hammer that would move a starship that she wanted, but enough control over that power to move something small. Power was nothing without control. If he was interested enough in learning what else their joined power could do, he’d forget about having her captured long enough for her to levitate something heavy into the back of his head and knock him out.

She couldn’t speak to him because the close physical contact she’d initiated had to be maintained, but when she raised their hands he seemed to get the message. As she concentrated, attempting to focus the tornado into a sharp point of accuracy his lips moved under hers, becoming softer, losing the angry set they’d had before. The power fell away as she relaxed the hard purse of her own mouth in reply, moulding herself against him.

It was possible she might be able to shift the desk into the bedroom to throw at him but as she reached for it there was another movement of his lips, which felt a bit like a smile and it distracted her momentarily. The Force blasted out of control, the desk smashing against the ceiling.

Frowning, she stretched their hands out, tried again. He did something. It was a little push against the seam of her mouth, right in the centre, and the chair she was attempting to hurl thudded against the back wall. She gathered herself, preparing for an assault on the sofa but he refused to keep still, pressing into her with just enough force to throw her off.

She paused, unsure quite what to make of it and he shook off her hand abruptly and stepped back. Before she could panic at the loss of contact, or so much as open her eyes he’d slid his hand up to her face, his thumb brushed her cheekbone and when his mouth touched hers again it was open.

The Force roared within her and with it came that excitement that lived in the pit of her stomach, that little illicit thrill that wouldn’t stay under control. There was something going on here that didn’t involve lifting furniture. He had clearly decided to be distracted, but not with cosmic energy or mystical forces, but with hands, and bodies and tongues.

His mouth moved against hers, encouraging and without being sure of the wisdom of what she was doing, she unclenched her jaw, allowed her face to match the movements of his. After a couple of iterations, she abandoned all attempts at doing anything else, forgot the danger she and her friends were in, forgot distractions and diversions and escape.

This was kissing, she was being kissed and she liked it.

The way his lips drove against her with increasingly fervent strokes, the natural ease with which she dropped into the rhythm he set, the sensation of his breath on her cheek, the tilt of his head when he deepened the kiss – she liked all of it. Without thinking, she moved the arm hanging redundant at her side, brought it up and around his neck and sank her fingers into his hair, twisting. A shudder ran through him and inside her, something rejoiced. His hand splayed out across the base of her spine, pulling their bodies into closer contact and she trembled to feel him pressed so tight. His tongue slid into her mouth, the sensation of it wrenching some kind of groan from the back of her throat. She lost herself in it, widening her mouth and reciprocating in kind, all tongue and lips and teeth, taking what she wanted and never letting go.

He stopped first, his head rearing back and breaking the embrace so suddenly she bit his lip, the taste of blood smashing whatever spell had been cast. Neither of them had their feet on the ground, although he was closer. She had a leg flung over his hip, his hand supporting her thigh and everything else in the room was floating. He lost his grip and she crashed to the floor, which had tilted at an alarming angle, the blare of sirens hurting her ears, warning lights in the ceiling flashing red.

She met his gaze; he blinked once, and then vanished.

She scrambled to her feet, staggering into the corridor in an attempt to compensate for the severe list of the ship. From the angle of descent, it was apparent that the Dreadnaught was falling towards the planet. Rey ran, riding the lift back to the hanger bay and fighting her way through the milling crowd of stormtroopers flooding the vast space as they attempted to evacuate.

‘Great work!’ Poe yelled without any sarcasm whatsoever, his hands flying over the controls. ‘Rose, get ready with that broadcast. Finn, punch it.’

The Falcon shot into space. From the cockpit window it looked like the captain of the _New Empire_ was desperately attempting to pull his ship out of a catastrophic dive into the centre of Coruscant, the angle so steep Rey wasn’t sure he was going to make it. She felt a spasm of guilt, the Falcon performed one victory roll and Poe promptly engaged the hyperdrive.


	7. Truces

It was the distraction that kept her awake. She knew it should be the fact that she’d nearly crashed a Dreadnaught into a planet and wiped out billions of lives – that was what was bothering the rest of the Resistance. All they knew was that she’d been busy distracting the Supreme Leader and the Force had gotten away from her, but that was enough to start the whispering in corridors, the suspicious looks in the canteen. She had it before of course, there were only so many occasions on which you could lift rocks before it stopped being cute and started being downright terrifying. People were afraid of her, particularly the new recruits, but as long as Poe and Finn were on her side no one would say anything to her face. But last night she’d walked in on Rose and Poe having an enormous argument during which the words ‘dark side’ and ‘out of control’ had been liberally used, and she’d started to think that her support amongst the leadership team might not be quite as solid as she’d thought.

She’d downed copious amounts of alcohol at Poe’s welcome home party for the Millennium Falcon in an attempt to forget the events of the previous day, but that wasn’t causing her insomnia. What kept her awake was the distraction.

If she hadn’t distracted him then the Resistance would be no more – Poe and Finn would have given up all its secrets before succumbing to a grisly end and she’d be spending her days in secure isolation. The distraction had been necessary. Her first instinct had been to divert him with power and for that to work she’d had to have a physical connection, so she’d kissed him and it had all gone wrong from there. At the time, there hadn’t seemed any other option. Now, she could come up with hundreds.

She had initiated contact, and all he’d done was take her up on the offer. What really kept her awake at night, tossing and turning in her narrow cot, listening to the swish of the vines and the howl of jungle mammals outside, was her reaction. She’d responded to his kiss, not just because she had to, not just because doing so would keep herself and her friends safe, but because she’d wanted to. There was a point when she was in his arms when all she’d wanted was to kiss, and to be kissed in return. She stayed awake, and thought about the distraction so long and so hard that she didn’t even notice when those thoughts faded into dreams.

It was early dawn when she awoke to the sight of a man sitting next to her on the edge of her bed. She groaned, rolling over and hiding her face in the crook of one elbow. ‘Are you really here?’

The tip of one, very real, very present finger touched the exposed flesh of her arm. ‘I’m here.’

‘And how long have you been here?’

‘Ajan Kloss.’

She groaned again. ‘Poe is going to kill me.’

‘Then don’t sleep so soundly. I went for a walk, calculated the angle of the suns, researched some of the more exotic wildlife. Interesting choice for a rebel base. I would have thought the mosquitos alone would make it uninhabitable. Why did you kiss me?’

She buried her face in the bed. ‘It was a diversion. I was trying to distract you.’

‘I’ll rephrase. Why did you carry on kissing me? Why did you stop trying to hit me with the furniture?’

‘Is that really what you came all the way here to ask?’

‘I came all the way here to ask what you were looking for in my bedroom. I’m going to assume it wasn’t me.’

‘I didn’t know that was your bedroom. Could’ve been anyone’s.’

‘Then tell me how you got onto the ship. I had the shuttle you came in analysed. It transmitted a shield slicer code that could only have been written by someone with a detailed and current knowledge of First Order technology. How did you get hold of it?’

‘Why do you care? Aren’t you supposed to be working with me to bring down the First Order from the inside so you can come back home?’ She rolled over onto her elbow, squinted up at him accusingly.

He gave the room a disparaging look. ‘Not if this is all that home has to offer.’

She sat up, put her back to the wall and glared in his direction. ‘Why are you in my bedroom? Don’t you have some ruling to do or something?’

‘In a minute. I came here to tell you that I’m about to announce a truce. I’ll be inviting the Resistance to attend peace talks as soon as I’ve found a neutral location.’ He held out a hand to her, nodded at it. ‘Go on then.’

‘Peace talks?’ she managed weakly.

‘Peace talks. You said if I declare a truce you’ll help me destroy the First Order and turn from the dark side and you’ll also trust every single word I say and hold my hand. So, go on then, there’s my hand. Unless you’d prefer to kiss me again.’

Her mouth fell open, but she thought he might take that as an invitation and snapped it shut. ‘That wasn’t a kiss, it was a diversion.’ He had that look about him again, the one from the vision, that strange suspicion that somewhere deep down he was enjoying himself, although he wasn’t quite able to let it surface.

He dropped his hand with an exaggerated sigh. ‘Alright, I suppose it can wait until next time.’

Over the last year the Resistance had learned the limitations of permanent bases. They’d had to move so many times at short notice that every piece of equipment, every generator, every scanner, every dwelling was now modular and therefore portable. Scarcely an hour had passed since Kylo Ren had made a dramatic exit, taking the location of the Resistance base with him, and already the majority of that base was ready for departure.

Rey watched as her home pod was winched into the belly of a cargo freighter and stacked on top of another, ready for quick deployment onto their new hideout, the ice world of Kijimi. Only one pod was to be left behind – the habitation of the Resistance’s only princess, remaining in position as a memorial on the last place she had drawn breath. Rey pulled up her hood and turned in the direction of the Falcon, ignoring the venomous glances being flung her way by the rest of the rebel scum. No one would quite believe that she hadn’t somehow been responsible for the discovery of their location – and now everyone blamed her for the fact that the First Order was undoubtedly on its way, as well as for the near destruction of Coruscant.

It had taken her a few moments after he’d left to work out what was missing. She’d sat up in bed immediately, knowing that she had to call an evacuation as quickly as possible but as she hunted for her boots she realised they were standing together in a neat pair right next to the door. This was not where she usually left them, and particularly not where she left them after stumbling back in an alcoholic stupor after drinking the night before. It occurred to her belatedly that no one needed to go for a walk and look at the wildlife to work out which planet they were on – they could simply use their communicator to obtain the information straight away. That meant that he had spent some time in her room while she was sleeping and the more she looked around, the more she realised that her belongings had been searched far more carefully than she had managed on his ship.

She had very few possessions and even fewer secrets so it was difficult to work out what he might have been looking for. The Jedi texts were untouched in their place beside the bed under a half drunk mug of caf, her lightsaber still attached to her belt below a mess of stained trousers. Only when she was dressed did she miss it – the slim saberstaff she’d appropriated from the Sith museum was nowhere to be found. She’d never so much as unfolded it and it wasn’t like its loss would impinge on her daily life, but the fact that he’d taken it still rankled – he was both a liar and a thief.

Kijimi was not popular with the Resistance from the moment of their arrival. The planet was freezing, their new home an ice cavern cut into the rock halfway up an inaccessible mountain pass. Rose was already complaining about how long it would take to fetch supplies, while Finn had bruised his elbow slipping on the ice and let Rey know in no uncertain terms that this was all her fault. It was for this reason that the Resistance did not learn that they had won the war until the comms relays were connected late into the evening, by which time the news had been playing on HoloNet for some time.

General Pryde, an older, dark haired man with an emaciated frame and sharpened cheekbones had given a terse interview, delivering his message in a clipped tone that suggested he didn’t approve. ‘Within the last few days the attempts of the outlawed Resistance to destabilise the First Order’s peaceful acquisition of the galaxy have sunk to a new low. They endangered billions of lives on Coruscant with a failed attempt to scuttle the First Order flagship in the middle of a celebration parade, showing no consideration for any potential loss of life. We will not allow this rebellion to continue unchecked. In an attempt to curtail the Resistance’s threat to our citizens, the First Order is willing to offer a temporary ceasefire. We will broker talks to determine whether there are any terms under which this terrorist organisation will agree to desist with their attacks on the peace of the galaxy. The First Order invites the Resistance to attend negotiations under a flag of truce on Dorumaa in two days time.’ The General frowned, bent slightly closer to the camera. ‘I imagine they will be too cowardly to show up.’

There was no one watching the broadcast on Kimiji who was not surprised, albeit for different reasons.

‘We’ve got them on the run,’ crowed Poe over the hubbub of raised voices. ‘I knew it would work in the end.’

‘Sounds like a trap to me,’ Rose was not quite so sure.

Finn was tapping at a pad. ‘Dorumaa is a water world, a resort planet in the Expansion Region noted for its ridable giant sea turtles. No military installations. Lots of hotels. Doesn’t appear to be a threat.’

‘It’s a neutral location,’ Rey noted absently. ‘Just like he said.’ This was going to be some sort of trick, wasn’t it? The sort of trick that got announced publicly by a high ranking official in the middle of a news broadcast. The sort of trick that couldn’t be reneged on because everyone in the galaxy would be watching.

‘Finn, get someone out to Dorumaa to keep an eye out for First Order infiltration. If this is an ambush we need to know. And try to get hold of the mole – maybe he can tell us if this is a serious offer, no, don’t say it, just try. Rose, you’d better get working on a list of demands – start with unconditional surrender to the Resistance and move down from there. I need to speak to a guy.’

Rey spent the next two days profoundly uncomfortable, and not just because most of the Resistance had stopped talking to her and it was so cold on Kimiji that the inside walls of her pod kept freezing. She vacillated between certainty that the truce was a trick and fear that it wasn’t, fear tinged with a sickly excitement that she might be called upon to make good on her promise - to help him turn from the dark side, to hold his hand. Maybe he was expecting more than that. Maybe she’d promised something she couldn’t deliver.

Dorumaa went some way towards alleviating her concerns. It wasn’t a place that lent itself to gloomy thoughts and depressing ruminations. It was mostly ocean, with a few isolated islands replete with sandy beaches, gently swishing palms and friendly wildlife, which popped up at regular intervals to wave a flipper. Even the breeze was gentle. Rey couldn’t imagine a place further from the First Order’s strict regime. The entire planet was empty, having been cleared of tourists in honour of the peace talks and the Resistance had swept both sea and land for hidden military tech, disguised stormtroopers, weapons caches, poison stashes, bugs and listening devices and anything else that Rose could think of. They had found nothing. This appeared to be as it had been advertised – a neutral location for a truce.

The Resistance delegation arrived at the appointed time the evening before talks were due to begin, their arrival choreographed so as not to clash with that of the Order’s hierarchy and avoid any potential unpleasantness in public. Rey passed through the weapons scanners set up in the lobby of the planet’s most exclusive hotel, which was larger than most of the bases she’d lived on, and gazed around with wide eyes. This level of expense wasn’t something to which she had ever been accustomed. The floors were surfaced with some kind of brilliant white, sparkling stone, buffed to a polish in which she could see her reflection and every facet of the walls glinted with precious metal, gleaming in the light cast by crystal chandeliers. It made her feel cheap, and she could see that same feeling in the uneasy glances her friends were giving each other, the way that their conversation flagged and died the further across the floor they went.

There was no one at the front desk, just a gleaming platinum service droid dispensing room keys and arranging for luggage to be transported upstairs. Rey kept hold of her single bag, which contained a change of clothes and nothing else of any practical value, began the long walk up the sweeping staircase to her room on the upper floor, trying not to lose her feet in the opulent depth of the carpet. She had been allocated a suite, rather than an individual chamber, complete with an entire lounge and kitchen, an old-fashioned bathroom with unlimited running water rather than the fresher she was used to, and a bed seemingly large enough to sleep six. She dumped her pack on the floor, not wishing to mess up the sheets and took off her shoes, because besmirching any of the costly, woven floor coverings with dirt from the outside world would be sacrilege. One of the walls in the bedroom had been replaced with windows responsive to movement, so that when she gestured them to open they glided silently to one side, letting in the warmth of the ocean breeze and the sound of the waves.

She stood on the balcony, feeling more at home outside than in the gilded salon behind her.

‘This planet used to be frozen, once upon a time.’ She wasn’t even remotely surprised to hear his voice. ‘Covered in ice, nothing alive in the seas. Then its trajectory was changed and the ice melted. Now it’s a different place.’

She tightened her hands on the smooth metal railings. He was somewhere behind her, a swatch of black just visible in the corner of her eye. ‘Is that what you’re doing here? Changing?’

There was a short silence, broken only by the crash of the sea and the call of distant birds. ‘You still don’t trust me.’

She stood there watching the waves. It was a request that she couldn’t refuse. Or to be more specific, it was a request that she shouldn’t refuse. He wanted redemption. He wanted to come home and he had asked her for help and that was what the light side was all about, wasn’t it? Forgiveness, selflessness, service to others. ‘I’m not sure I know how,’ she replied eventually.

‘I have done everything you asked of me. You wanted peace, I called a truce. You wanted that ship back, I let you escape with it. You kissed me, I kissed you back. What else can I do, Rey? What else is there?’

She sighed. ‘Say you’re sorry.’

‘What for?’

‘Everything. For what you did to your family. For what you did to everyone else. For the choices you made and what happened because of them.’

He came to stand next to her, close, but not touching and his fingers were white as they gripped the railing. ‘No,’ he said.

She flicked him a glance but he was gazing out to sea, fixed on a point far away on the horizon. ‘I will kneel but I will not crawl. It is not your place to forgive me – there is no one left who can. And the mistakes I have made, I did not make them alone. I will not allow you, or anyone else to pick over my errors and tell me exactly where I went wrong. I will make amends in my own way and either you accept that, or you don’t, I am done begging you for help. You can trust me now, or walk away and we can go back to fighting each other until the rest of the galaxy is dead and gone and you are standing on the moral high ground with the wreckage of everything you have ever loved beneath your feet.’ The hand on the railing next to hers turned palm up. ‘It is such a precious thing, a second chance. Are you really so sure you will never need one?’

There was an ocean in front of her and a door at her back but Rey still felt like she had been boxed into a corner. It was a problem of her own making, at least partly. She wanted to be the sort of person who offered second chances, who always saw the good in people and was ready with forgiveness but this man had burned her before and she found it difficult to walk into the fire so readily again. But this was a request she couldn’t refuse, and still be the person she wanted to believe she was.

Tentatively, she reached out and took his hand.


	8. Dark sides and distractions

There was a brief moment of awkwardness when his fingers squeezed hers for a fraction too long and she had to extract them, but he recovered well.

‘How do we begin?’ he asked, turning to face her with an arm draped casually across the railings, giving every appearance of being relaxed following the tense words they had just exchanged.

‘You could start by giving my new lightsaber back,’ she suggested, searching for a neutral subject.

‘I don’t have it.’

She was instantly annoyed. ‘Liar. You stole it from my room on Ajan Kloss.’

‘I don’t have it here,’ he clarified, cutting across her. ‘It’s on my shuttle. Why do you always expect me to bring weapons into truce situations?’

‘Why did you steal it in the first place?’

‘It called to me,’ he explained simply. ‘I was surprised you had something so dangerous just lying around. I wanted to study it so I borrowed it for a few days. You can have it back whenever you like. Now, if you insist.’

She snorted at that. ‘I think the Resistance might notice you bringing your shuttle into a truce situation.’

‘They don’t need to know. We can go to it.’

She caught his meaning. ‘We can travel through the Force?’

‘I can teach you how it’s done. If you don’t mind a certain amount of physical contact.’

Until that moment she had conveniently forgotten the fact that a few short days ago she had spent some time in his arms, those full lips pressed to hers, that tongue filling the inside of her mouth with delicious sensation. Her heart gave an unwelcome thud and she could feel the flush rise into her cheeks. His dark eyes watched hers steadily, taking in the involuntary reactions that gave her away.

‘How much physical contact?’

He shrugged, opened his arms but his attention flickered to her lips. ‘Not enough to crash a Dreadnaught.’ 

She was absolutely sure he was thinking about the kissing too, and the heat in her face intensified. Her arms had been round his neck, her body swarming over his to the extent that she’d hooked her thigh around his leg, and he’d had to grab it to stop her falling over. She had lost any semblance of self control, throwing herself at him in frantic desire in response to a simple press of mouth on mouth. He must think she was desperate for him.

She took a tiny step forward, closed her eyes and then turned her head when she felt his embrace, her cheek rubbing the rough fabric of his tunic and coming to rest much closer to his armpit than his lips. The connection that hid inside her flared into being, accompanied by a palpable rush of exhilaration. His arms settled themselves comfortably around her back.

‘This took me a while to master, so don’t expect it to work right away,’ he said into her hair. ‘Focus on the link between us, concentrate on it as hard as you can and think about seeing me. Imagine what I look like, imagine what I sound like, imagine what I feel like and then use the connection to make it real. Imagine I’m standing right in front of you, and if you do it right, I will be.’

‘That’s not going to be very difficult,’ she told the side of his chest.

She’d kept her arms flattened to her sides to indicate that she was only participating in this hug under duress but it wasn’t really working. Today he smelt like clean clothes and sunshine, with a hint of coconut somewhere underneath, and the rumble of his chest when he spoke thrummed through her nerve endings. She was acutely aware of every part of his body, and just how close to hers it was.

He took a deep breath, her head moving as his lungs expanded and his arms tightened fractionally. ‘Conceptually, what we’re trying is the same thing. You’ve been on board my ship, imagine what it looks like, how white the hull shines in daylight, the sound of the ramp engaging, the smell of the engines.’

‘The scars on the walls,’ she murmured, thinking back. ‘The smashed screens, the wires all over the floor, the way it’s been eviscerated.’

‘The minor cosmetic damage,’ he corrected, rather sharply.

‘The way it seems so sad.’

She was there. Something shifted with a blur too fast to register properly and when she blinked she was there, in the corridor outside the main passenger cabin with her fingertips pressed to the wall. She was alone, the shuttle was cold and empty, illuminated only by the red twilight of Dorumaa spilling through the windows. She wasn’t sure how far behind her he was, but she guessed she probably didn’t have a lot of time.

She strode over to the drawer that had been open on her last visit, yanked it hard to reveal his hoard of treasures. The melted helmet of course, the folded blade, which was not her primary objective, and the small pyramid shaped device for which he’d murdered the creature in the swamp. She grabbed it, expecting it to open immediately, before belatedly remembering that there was a trick to making it give up its secrets. She bent her head, attempted to bring the Force to bear but while she could feel it was listening, the right words slipped out of her grasp.

‘It’s a wayfinder,’ he said, from somewhere close by. ‘It’s what you were looking for in my room isn’t it? But how did you know what to look for? You’re trying to open it – how do you know what to do? Who told you? You’ve been watching me, haven’t you? Spying.’

She threw the device back in the drawer, realising her time was up. ‘It’s called surveillance.’

He was leaning against the wall with his arms folded, a frown on his face, although he seemed more curious than furious. ‘It’s called intelligence. This isn’t the only thing you know that you shouldn’t. Where I’d be before my coronation, that was another one – when you exploded a droid in my face. I was stuck in a bacta tank for days having those burns fixed. How did you know? There’s a spy in the First Order isn’t there – a Resistance agent on the inside. Who is it?’

He pushed off from the wall and she grabbed for the double lightsaber just in time, snapping it open with a twitch of her hand. He flung out an arm and his own weapon sailed across the room as he dropped into an opening stance, although he didn’t turn it on. Her thumb moved automatically over the controls, finding the right one without any conscious effort and both red beams burst into being.

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. ‘I’m not fighting you,’ he reminded her quickly.

He was frightened. She could see that, scent his sudden fear in the air. She had him on the run. The weapon felt so natural in her hands, lighter than her staff but as well balanced, fitting perfectly into her palm, an organic extension of her arm. She swished it experimentally in his direction and he moved, circling carefully in the direction of the door. She could beat him with this saber, she sensed. This weapon gave her power greater than any she had ever had, it had been made for her, it called to her. They were one.

This blade could help her accomplish her objective – there was no need to listen to any more of his whining about turning from the dark side, she could simply kill him and dismantle her enemies herself. This chance was what she had been waiting for.

She raised the saberstaff, focused and ready. Like the coward he was, he turned tail and ran and she had to track him off the ship and onto the narrow beach on which it had been parked. The red light from the double blades matched the twilight that reddened the sands, sands that would shortly be redder still with his blood. She prepared to strike.

‘Everything he said was true,’ her opponent muttered. ‘You go straight to the dark, you don’t even fight it.’

She swung into the attack and he was forced to ignite his paltry single blade to defend himself. The red staff whirled, a circle of glowing death and he fell back beneath it, barely able to counter in time. Her reach was so much longer now, her strength expanded beyond all limits, her intention sure. She studied his footwork carefully. Soresu, defensive. She had only to shift to Niman and she could take him easily. She flung herself into an acrobatic leap, feinting to the left before disarming him with a blast of the Force from her right hand. He sprawled on the sand, scrambling desperately away.

‘Magnificent,’ he said. ‘What I wouldn’t give to see you wearing black.’

She landed lightly, both hands manipulating the staff into a blur of deadly scarlet. She was going to take his head. He got back to his feet, lurching towards her, and with a burst of unexpected speed, ducked under her next strike and came up with both hands on her staff, forcing one end down until it hissed as it met wet sand. She put all her new found might into levelling the blade, baring her teeth at the effort of such a physical struggle. Head to head, only the staff separated them and he was so close to her that strands of his overly long, sweaty hair lashed against her forehead.

He didn’t loosen his grip, but he glanced over, caught her eye and said cryptically, ‘My turn.’

Then he let go, and, because she hadn’t anticipated the move, she yanked the staff up so fast it flew out of her hands and catapulted away. She grunted with anger and summoned it back, but while she was distracted, he pounced.

A large hand grabbed the back of her head, throwing her forward, off balance and his lips latched onto her mouth, predatory and determined. She stumbled, but his other hand attached itself to her backside, hauling her roughly against him, unable to squirm away from the hot jab pressing into her belly. Her gasp of outrage was smothered by the tongue that forced its way between her teeth and took a tour of the soft spots on her palate, pausing only to probe deliberately against the places that made her shiver. The Force rose up inside her with a howl, re-establishing the connection between herself and her unwanted other half, and breaking whatever hold the Sith blade had exerted on her mind. She wasn’t completely sure how it had happened but she was being kissed, ardently, passionately, by someone who knew what he was doing and wasn’t holding back.

She wedged her hands against his chest, heaved him away and he staggered back, two spots of high colour on his cheeks, panting hard.

‘Now that,’ he said, running a hand through his hair. ‘Was a distraction.’

‘What happened?’ She felt shaky and slightly sick, although how much of that was down to the Sith and how much was due to the fact that she could still taste him was unclear.

He straightened, held out a hand and waited for the bent blades to obey their instructions. ‘You demonstrated that you can’t be allowed anywhere near ancient dark side artefacts like this one. You could have killed me.’

‘I think that was the idea.’

He examined the casing for damage, flipped open the hinge and toggled the on switch briefly. The blades hissed into life and she shuddered. ‘Why does that thing affect me and not you?’

He turned the staff slowly through the air, the red illumination giving the angles of his face a more acute focus, an expression flitting through his eyes that was darker than she’d seen for a while. She fumbled for her belt but there was no weapon hanging from it.

‘It does affect me. But I control it, I don’t let it control me.’ He switched the lightsaber off with a determined tap. ‘Unlike you.’

‘Then – thank you for saving me from the dark side.’

A startled expression shot across his face and disappeared.

A moment later, she did too, reappearing on the balcony of her bedroom amidst a swirl of ocean spray. Before he could follow her back she hurried into the bathroom, running water loudly into the bath to cut off any further attempt at conversation.

She sat on the side of the tub and wrapped her arms around herself, trying to soothe away the jagged aftermath of the last few minutes. Was that what it was like? Was that how easy it was to fall to the dark? She had heard a few faint whispers in Ochi’s cave and the next thing she knew, she was trying to remove Ben’s head with a Sith blade for no good reason apart from the fact that she could. He’d said she hadn’t tried to stop it. That was exactly what Luke had said, more than a year ago. She didn’t seem to have any defence against the dark, whenever she got too near it swallowed her up and this time she’d only been saved by her worst enemy – or whatever he was to her now.

She bent over, hugging her stomach. All that training, all the Jedi texts and the practising and the trying so hard to be strong and brave and true and for what – the very first encounter she’d had with the dark she’d failed. She dashed tears from her eyes with the heel of her hand. This was pathetic, crying in the middle of a bathroom but she couldn’t seem to stop. She was a failure, flawed and broken – she might look like a Jedi on the outside but white robes and a blue blade didn’t make her pure. There was darkness inside her just waiting to get out.

Her friends suspected it. She’d seen the way that Finn looked at her sometimes, when she’d enjoyed a demonstration a little too much, when she’d lifted someone into the air and kept them there just a fraction too long. The times when she’d been so frustrated that the Force had escaped her control and broken something, the times when she’d been so angry she’d had to disappear and hit out in private. She had nearly crashed a Dreadnaught into a planet and she’d been more bothered about kissing – what did that say about her claim to the light?

There was no one she could talk to, no one to help her work out where she’d gone wrong; Luke and Leia were both dead and no one else could possibly understand.

There was a light tap on the bathroom door. She didn’t respond and after a decent interval, she heard another tap, slightly louder this time. She covered her face with her hands, trying to wipe away the mess of crying, or at least hide it from prying eyes. But the Force was an efficient lock pick and the catch disengaged with a snick that carried even over the rush of water.

‘I don’t want to talk to you,’ she managed, although her voice was strangled and hoarse.

The door halted in its swing.

‘Let me know when you do,’ said the one person left in the galaxy who might be able to understand.


	9. The Resistance strikes back

The catharsis of crying was helpful, even if the swollen eyes and snot were not, and Rey woke refreshed the next morning after a deep sleep, and feeling steadier about the events of the previous day. Sometime overnight she had come to the conclusion that she was not alone, and although she’d been told that before, she had never needed to believe it quite so much. Today promised to be challenging, but she would face it with her friends on her side, and an ally in the enemy camp.

She met the Resistance negotiation team outside the meeting room five minutes before the appointed time as agreed, and they looked almost as nervous as she felt.

‘Remember the plan,’ whispered Poe as droids swept open two sets of double doors at precisely the same time and both sides entered the chamber from opposite ends.

Numbers were limited. During the initial negotiations several mediators had been proposed but neither the Resistance nor the First Order had been able to agree on a single candidate felt by both sides to be impartial so the peace talks were to progress without a formal facilitator. To address the consequent risk of an all out gun battle in the negotiating chamber dampening fields had been installed, to ensure that no energy related blade could be generated or projectile fired, and magnetic emitters in the ceiling would pull all metal implements well out of reach. Three delegates each were allowed. One Force user for each side had been written into the truce protocol, with the intention that this would counteract any attempts at mind control; two senior military personnel could also attend.

Rey recognised both the First Order generals from HoloNet – the ginger one, Hux, prone to shouting and wild hysteria and a more recent recruit who had only come to power after the death of Snoke. General Pryde embodied his name, a ramrod straight, severe individual as serious as his counterpart was excitable, who usually popped up with dire threats and warnings, all issued with a contemptuous curl of the lip. They flanked the Supreme Leader, whom Rey could not yet look in the eye and took their seats at the oval conference table.

In contrast, Poe and Rose spent some time fiddling with the various pads and storage devices they were carrying, dropping one on the table with a clatter and then pulling out chairs in a scraping clash, as legs tangled and bashed together. Rey extracted her own chair more calmly, her peripheral vision letting her know that the Supreme Leader’s dark eyes were watching her and he only seated himself when she was down.

There was a short pause, during which she studied the glossy surface of the table and felt the tension in the man to her right rise. Poe really hated silences. She tapped a fingernail to get his attention. ‘Agenda.’

‘Yes, right. Introductions. I’m General Dameron and this is General Tico. This is Rey, she didn’t want to be a general but she’s pretty important anyway.’ He eyeballed the rest of the table. ‘General Hugs, your mother sends her regards, and you in the black – long time, no see – love what you’ve done with your hair. And General Pryde, welcome to the gang. Shall we get down to business?’

General Pryde shifted in his chair, pulling his own device closer and quoting from something on screen. ‘Participants shall refrain from addressing each other by anything other than given name, rank or title. Failure to do so will result in the termination of proceedings.’ He flicked his eyes up at Poe. ‘I believe this was drafted with you in mind, General?’

Rose gave Poe a look, and took over. ‘Item two on the agenda is Resistance truce proposals. Our proposals are simple. We propose that the First Order surrenders to us immediately. The terms of surrender are the forfeiture of all weapons, military equipment and transports, including navy and land craft and the immediate demobilisation of the army. This will be accompanied by withdrawal from all First Order occupied territories and restoration of all preceding governance arrangements at the First Order’s cost, including the re-instatement of deposed governments, monarchs and collectives. In return, we propose that all First Order collaborators below the rank of general will be released without charge and persons holding the rank of general and above will be subject to Republic laws and sanctions, which will involve public trials.’

There was absolute silence.

He was still looking at her. The weight of his attention was so heavy she felt it on her shoulders and she risked a glance across the room to see how he’d taken Rose’s words. There was no sign that he’d heard. She met his stare but there was no hostility in it. Instead, his eyebrows raised fractionally in a question.

This was no time to speak to him, and in any case she couldn’t give away the fact that they’d been in touch while he was sitting in the middle of his high command so instead she blinked once, slowly enough to indicate that it was deliberate. She was fine.

A line developed between his eyebrows and the skin under his eyes tightened a notch. He didn’t believe her.

She ducked her chin in a camouflaged nod. She was sure she was fine.

His features smoothed out, reassured.

Next to him General Hux started laughing, a high pitched, nasal sound. ‘You want to put the First Order on trial?’ Hux could barely contain his glee.

‘Wait, what?’ Ben’s reaction was delayed, but predictably angry when it came.

General Pryde was moving, fingers tapping urgently on a datacube. ‘You expect us to surrender to you?’ he asked, in a tone of disdain. A map of the galaxy filled the air above the table, First Order territories marked out in little red circles. ‘This is the First Order. This is what we control. We own the Core Worlds, the Colonies, the Inner Rim and most of the Expansion Region. We have significant holdings in the Mid Rim and more of the Outer Rim comes under our dominion every day. Whereas this is you.’

He pressed another button and a light scattering of blue dots appeared on the map. ‘This is the sum total of all the progress your pitiful Resistance has managed to make over the last year.’ He pointed out key elements on the map. ‘A foothold in the Outer Rim. A couple of bases in the Mid Rim. A quite pathetic attempt to explore wild space. And that’s it. So tell me – why would we surrender to you? What possible incentive could there be for us to accept your ludicrous offer?’

Ben leant forward, addressing his apparent outrage directly at Rey. ‘This is the best you could come up with? I offer you peace and the price of that is that I – all of us – have to submit to a trial, and probable execution at your hands?’ He hammered a finger at the table. ‘That is not an acceptable solution.’

Rey spread her hands. ‘What did you think would happen? You have to make amends.’

‘I will make amends in my own way,’ he all but shouted, and then shot a hasty glance at his uniformed counterparts. ‘Not that I have anything to make amends for.’

Rose chipped in, steely and determined. ‘You are war criminals, all of you. The First Order has blood on its hands. The galaxy will not allow you to walk off quietly into the sunset when so many people have died. We need justice.’

‘You want vengeance,’ Ben snapped. ‘Not justice. Who are you anyway? Who is this, Rey?’

She gave him a sad smile. ‘Someone who lost her sister. She deserves an apology.’

He reared back in his chair. ‘I’ve made it perfectly clear that…’

Poe cut in, in a loud enough voice to drown out even the Supreme Leader’s protestations. ‘Agenda item three. Negotiations. Rose, play it.’

Rose reached for her own projector, played the holovid she’d spent two days on Kijimi preparing. The same star chart appeared in the air above the table, the galaxy scattered with the same red dots as before.

‘This is you. Core Worlds, Colonies, Inner Rim, blah, blah. These are the worlds on which you have a presence anyway. And these are the worlds on which there isn’t already a rebellion against you. These are the planets you can genuinely say you control.’ The horde of red dots reduced down to a mere handful. She thumbed another button. ‘Whereas this is the Resistance.’ The galaxy lit up in an enormous sweep of blue.

‘The Outer Rim is ours, most of the Mid Rim too. We have cells poised to overthrow you on every single outpost you have in the Inner Rim and you’re so thinly spread in the Expansion Region you haven’t even noticed we’re already taking over.’ She sat back in her chair, steepled her fingers in obvious satisfaction. ‘You’ve missed the armada we have gathering in wild space, waiting for the signal to attack. The Core is yours, I’ll give you that, but only because we’ve been too busy to bother with it yet. You can keep it for a couple more weeks if you like.’

‘This is a bluff.’ General Pryde shook his head.

‘You’ve done all this in a year?’ Hux commented, in a tone that was almost awe.

‘You’ve had help.’ Ben tightened his hand into a fist. ‘You’re working with an informant inside the First Order. That’s the only explanation.’

‘It doesn’t matter how this happened,’ Pryde chipped in. ‘What matters is what happens next. Your freedom fighters are no match for our army. We will crush your armada and your resistance cells and you will beg us for peace before we’re finished.’

‘Actually, we won’t.’ Poe kicked back from the table, linking his fingers behind his head. ‘Because I know a guy.’

‘You know a guy?’ The contempt in General Pryde’s voice would have floored a lesser man.

‘Play it again, Rose.’

Rose toggled a few more buttons. ‘It’s been apparent for a while that the First Order has been overreaching itself. The colonisation of the planets you’ve been annexing hasn’t been popular with the people that live on them, not only because of the repression of free speech and the summary justice, but because of the taxes you’ve imposed, the assets you’ve stolen, the trade you’ve prevented. We’ve been talking to ‘guys’ all over the galaxy about it.’

She nodded at Rey. ‘Stall holders on Naboo. The big banks who’ve loaned you credits, the cartels you’ve been ripping off, the merchant houses, the guilds, weapons manufacturers, your suppliers. You aren’t popular with any of them but they didn’t want to support us until they were sure we could win. Then you showed your weakness and offered us a truce. Over the last two days we’ve solidified our support and now we’re ready to take you down. You may have an army, but as soon as your supplies run out they’ll stop being fed, and you’ll have no credit left to keep them going. You can crush our armada but we have the promise of more ships, unlimited numbers, straight out of the shipyards to take the place of any you destroy. We have enough funding to crew a whole fleet with mercenaries, if we need to.’

She clicked off the projection in a sudden silence. ‘No one holds peace talks unless they’re about to lose.’

Poe smiled. ‘We are not alone. Good people will fight if we lead them. But so will bad people if they think they’ll make money from it.’

Hux exploded from his seat in a froth of rage. ‘We should never have called these talks. I said we...’

Ben extended a finger calmly and his subordinate’s words were choked off. ‘We will discuss your offer and reconvene tomorrow.’ His cloak swirled as he marched from the room.

‘That went well,’ remarked Poe.

Rey went back to her room and waited. She had a couple of hours to wonder about the extent of his reaction before her comms channel rang with a call connected through from reception.

It was audio only, the voice on the other end clipped and taut. ‘I need to see you. Immediately.’

He cut the call before she could respond, leaving her in no doubt that she had been summoned in the same way that the rest of his employees were summoned and her first instinct was not to reply. She sat for a few minutes seething quietly before reminding herself that she was supposed to be trusting him, and he had spent yesterday evening saving her from the wrong side of the Force, which probably merited some patience. She pushed away her annoyance, and, rationalising that she couldn’t just wander into his bedroom without raising some serious questions she marshalled her power and concentrated on his lesson of yesterday. She focused on her impressions of him, and although she attempted to use neutral observations like the colour of his hair or the size of his boots what came to her most strongly was the feel of his mouth on hers, the shape of his lips when he was kissing her.

She concentrated on that and once the connection between them sparked into life there was a quiet blur and his room popped into being before her eyes. It wasn’t in the hotel.

She was standing in the living room of his suite on board the Dreadnaught, which was looking much tidier than the last time she’d seen it, halfway through nearly crashing into Coruscant. Someone had reordered the desk and through an archway into the next room, his bed had been made and his clothes re-hung. He was standing with his back to her at the comms relay, tapping his chin as he studied a large number of holographic simulation exercises the machinery had conjured into being. In front of him, spread out on a map of the galaxy red dots and blue dots formed ranks, wiped each other out and then started all over again.

He shot her a glance before turning back to the battle simulations on screen. ‘Pryde has sent out probes to every planet on which you claim to have a presence and he has scouts en route to wild space to track down this armada of yours. What will he find?’

She wandered over to the map, responding to the dispassionate tone he was using with some calm of her own. ‘Exactly what we said he’d find. Bases, temporary camps, fortified locations, ground transportation, maintenance facilities, cargo, medical supplies, landing craft, shuttles, frigates, cruisers.’ She shrugged. ‘The Resistance.’

He made a few movements with his hands and the speed of the simulations increased but he continued to be immersed in the display. ‘Then why do you need me? If you’re this close to defeating the First Order I don’t understand why you need me on your side.’

She drifted away, examining the devices strewn on the desk with a feigned curiosity. ‘I don’t need you on my side, I want you on my side.’

‘Why?’

Turning from the desk, she took a few paces into the bedroom. ‘Because if you can help me negotiate peace we won’t have to fight the First Order and many lives will be saved.’

Glancing over her shoulder she saw that the simulations were now running at a speed almost too fast to register and his shoulders had hunched as he concentrated. ‘Is that the only reason?’

She took a few more steps away, just in case. ‘Yes.’

‘Then this was all a ploy to get me to declare a truce? You took advantage of my… weakness when my mother died to manipulate me into giving in to your demands. You said you’d only help me if I arranged peace talks because you knew that would signal to your supporters that the Order could be defeated. You played me.’

She stopped where he couldn’t see her, frowning. ‘That’s a very selective view. You came to me, remember. You asked for help. I gave you what you wanted.’

There was a loud crash from the other room as something broke but his reply was still unnaturally calm. ‘What would really help, is some idea of numbers so I can work out if there is any way we can beat you. How many cruisers do you have? How many mercenaries? What’s your defensive capability? Where are your supply lines?’

She was silent, padding around the bed on noiseless feet and opening the storage cabinet she’d found the last time she came, reaching inside for the half empty bottle of perfume. ‘And why would I tell you any of that?’

‘Because it would really help to convince the army that we can’t win. They’re not going to surrender if there’s any way they can avoid it.’

That wasn’t the answer she’d been expecting. She straightened sharply to find him propped in the doorway regarding her with his arms folded. ‘Of course, there’s also the problem of how you’re going to defeat our huge fleet of decommissioned Imperial Star Destroyers which have been mothballed in the Unknown Regions for years. Pryde will have activated them by now, they’ll be on their way.’

That wasn’t the answer she’d been expecting either and she fumbled when he threw a storage card across the room, missed the catch. ‘The co-ordinates are on that. Maybe you should go and check it out.’

She stared at him in amazement. She hadn’t expected him to take the Resistance’s negotiating position well. They hadn’t trusted his desire to defect from the first time she’d revealed it and there was a collective view that the Resistance should attempt to maximise their advantage, making the best of whatever opportunities Ben Solo’s bleeding heart might be able to offer. Rey had little choice but to go along with it, because until the events of the previous evening she hadn’t really trusted him either, and once in the negotiating room it was too late to turn back.

But she felt slightly ashamed, standing there in his bedroom, feeling like she’d let him down.

‘I understand,’ he said, and there was badly concealed hurt in his eyes. ‘Trust is earned, not given. I’ve been untrustworthy and you need time to learn to trust me.’

She bit her lip, on the verge of apologising.

‘Just one thing - are you really going to go ahead with the trial?’

She shrugged. ‘You won’t be executed. I can get you off if you collaborate.’

‘Glad to hear it. Will I be incarcerated for the rest of my life instead?’

‘Exiled. If I can get them to agree to it.’

‘I’ll accept that on one condition.’ He jabbed a finger in the air. ‘You’re coming with me.’

‘And why would I agree to that?’

He was across the room in three strides, leaning close enough to place his words directly into her ear. ‘Because last time you were on this ship you enjoyed kissing me so much you nearly crashed it.’

The connection broke with the force of her irritation, leaving her back in her hotel room throwing the bottle she was still carrying at the wall.


	10. He's our only hope

‘He gave you this voluntarily?’ Poe was still unconvinced, although he’d already inserted the storage card into the comms relay in his room. ‘You didn’t steal it, or trick him in any way?’

Rey shook her head. ‘It was voluntary. And he’s accepted that he needs to stand trial as well.’ She dug her toe into the carpet. ‘I may have misjudged him.’

‘Let’s see about that, shall we? Finn, are you getting this?’

Finn’s voice came out of the tiny speaker with a booming echo that filled the room. ‘It contains co-ordinates plotted on a map. I’m running it through the navigational computer now to see if I can find a match. Working…..got it.’ He gave a low whistle that was loud enough to deafen. ‘You’re not going to believe this. Putting it on screen.’

The relay generated two swirling star charts side by side, blurry blue dots making up a pattern that was recognisably the same across both maps.

‘I don’t recognise it,’ Poe commented. ‘Finn?’

‘The one on the left, the one with co-ordinates, is the map Rey was given by Kylo Ren and the map on the right is the star chart from his wayfinder, the one the mole showed us. They both lead to the same place.’

‘Imperial Star Destroyers,’ she whispered. ‘He said mothballed Imperial Star Destroyers, not First Order.’

‘If he’s right, then I’m guessing we’re looking at the location of Darth Vader’s secret base, and Darth Vader’s secret army. Do you want me to send a probe? I have the directions from the new map now, it’s easily done.’

‘As quickly as you can, Finn. We need to know exactly what’s there because if this is a new fleet…if this is a new fleet…’

‘Then we’re in serious trouble,’ finished Rose.

A whole afternoon and evening went by without any further contact from Finn, time which was spent in anxious pacing, fractious conversation and little in the way of decision making. Rey knew that with its current level of battle ready resources and financial backing the Resistance could take out the First Order, although it would be a lengthy struggle, involving the potential loss of many lives on both sides. These calculations had been made based on intelligence, surveillance and information the mole had provided over the last year and the negotiating stance that the rebels had taken earlier that day had been based squarely on their existing knowledge of the other side. If their opponent had an entire fleet waiting in reserve then the balance of power would tip in the First Order’s favour.

It was in the early hours of the morning that Finn’s probe finally arrived and began sending back images of the Unknown Regions. On Dorumaa, the three members of the audience could only watch and listen.

‘According to the chart,’ Finn began. ‘This planet is called Exogol. It’s a long way from its star. It’s a long way from anywhere. Temperature and oxygen content are inconsistent with sentient life.’

Dropping out of hyperspace, the footage showed a dead, blackened landscape from which every piece of natural life had been blasted. There was no sign of animal or human existence on the surface, no water, no vegetation, simply rock and more rock, all covered in an oppressive shadow cast by the towering stone formations that dominated the scene.

‘The probe is picking up energy signatures,’ said Finn. ‘I’ll get closer.’

The camera shot out of a canyon and raced over the starlit, boulder strewn ground, stopping short next to a very large, square block of a shiny material which was suspended without any obvious support above the surface. Whatever this object was, it was obviously not natural – the sides were too regular, the angles too sharp.

‘Closer,’ murmured Poe, but Finn was already on it.

The perspective shifted above and around the block, but it was only when the probe attempted to penetrate underneath that Rey saw it. ‘Stairs.’

They were cut straight out of the ground, leading downwards into darkness.

‘Shall I go in?’

‘Leave it, Finn. Whatever – or whoever - is in that hole it’s a fleet we’re looking for today.’

The perspective shifted as the probe climbed, pulling up through the atmosphere into orbit above the planet. There was no need for commentary.

‘There are thousands of them,’ Poe breathed.

Ships completely filled the probe’s sphere of vision. Lined up in neat rows and all facing the same direction, they resembled a phalanx of arrowheads, paused in the middle of a shot. They weren’t moving and even from this distance it was apparent that the majority were uninhabited, the running lights off and engines cold, black windows reflecting the stars.

‘Those aren’t Imperial Star Destroyers,’ Poe sounded certain. ‘Look at the ventral cannon ports. Finn, can you get closer?’

The probe spent some time navigating into a better line of sight, manoeuvring its way cautiously towards the closest of the ships and then an expanded picture of the Destroyer’s armaments appeared on screen as Finn zoomed in.

Poe stabbed at the screen. ‘That’s not standard equipment. Finn, can you match it to anything we have on file?’

The weapon Poe had indicated was a large, round gun, which looked much like every other large round gun with which Rey was familiar, except that this particular design hadn’t featured on her own personal Imperial wreckage back on Jakku. A feeling of unease prickled the hair on her arms. She had a feeling she wasn’t going to like the answer to Poe’s question.

‘Identified it.’ Finn also sounded like he didn’t like the answer. ‘We’ve encountered something similar before. On Crait. It’s miniaturised Death Star tech. Those Star Destroyers have been fitted with weapons that can destroy a planet.’

‘Get out of there, Finn,’ Poe ordered. ‘It doesn’t look like they’ve spotted us yet and they all seem to be in hibernation. Let’s not wake them up.’

‘Stop.’ Rey’s feeling of unease intensified. ‘There, up in the top left of the shot. I thought I saw…’

Finn directed the probe in the direction she’d suggested and there on the screen, apparent to everyone watching the video feed was a fully operational, modified Star Destroyer, the blue heat of its engine core at a low ebb, but brightening as the minutes passed.

‘They’re coming,’ Rose said.

No one panicked. There wasn’t enough time for panic.

‘We have to stop that fleet. Now. Today. If all those ships come out of stasis in support of the First Order we’ve lost, and the galaxy is lost. Nothing will be able to stand up to that kind of firepower. They’ll just blast us out of the sky and when they’ve finished with the Resistance they’ll start on all the planets who’ve supported us. Our allies will be destroyed, completely wiped out because we’ve just told the First Order exactly who they are. Rey said the Order is sending probes to confirm the location of all our bases and our armada, which was fine when we were in a position of power and we wanted them to know how strong we were, but now that information is going to destroy us. We’ve just given the First Order a list of targets. The alliance will be hunted down to the last man or woman unless we stop that fleet right here, right now.’

Rose said, ‘How?’

Poe flicked a glance at Rey. ‘We know where it is and as long as it stays there, in hibernation, it’s less of a threat. It doesn’t look like there are a lot of crew assigned yet. We can get some bombers to the Unknown Regions and blow up every one of those Destroyers if they stay exactly where they are. We just need a few days to get ready. But that fleet has to stay where it is.’

Rose said again, ‘How?’

Rey was already shaking her head. ‘He won’t do it.’

‘He’s our only hope. And believe me, I never thought I’d be saying that,’ Poe replied.

‘He still won’t do it. He thinks I tricked him into arranging a truce so we could get enough backing to destroy the Order.’

‘I thought he wanted to destroy it. He gave us the co-ordinates of the Imperial fleet.’

‘Yes, but he doesn’t trust me anymore. He won’t stop the fleet just because I ask him to. And we told him he had to go on trial – we threatened him with execution – why should he do anything to help the Resistance now? He arranged a truce and we threw it back in his face.’

‘If he doesn’t order that fleet to stand down, we’re all dead,’ Poe said baldly. ‘It’s as simple as that. You need to find a way to persuade him. Appeal to his conscience.’

‘He doesn’t have a conscience,’ Rose muttered.

‘Then appeal to his better judgement. Flatter him. Tell him you love him, I don’t care. Just get him to order the fleet to stand down.’

Rey swallowed. ‘Will you be coming with me?’

‘Do you think that would help?’

‘That won’t help,’ Rose sounded certain. ‘You’re going to have to go to his room in the middle of the night and ask for a favour. Having Poe with you will not help, trust me. I saw the way that man was looking at you this morning, he couldn’t take his eyes off you. You can be persuasive in a way that Poe can’t, pretty as he is.’

Rey just stared at her. ‘I’m sure it won’t come to that,’ she stammered.

‘It will come to that, trust me.’

Rose’s words haunted her back down the corridor and by the time she reached her suite she’d made a decision. She had no weapon with which to beat him into submission, after their last conversation he would be too suspicious for her to be able to talk him into anything and he wasn’t going to stop that fleet just because she asked him to. She had to find another way – the fate of the galaxy was in her hands. She would just have to be, as Rose had suggested, more persuasive. Luckily, he’d already demonstrated that he was vulnerable to a specific type of persuasion twice in the last few days so it probably wasn’t too much of a stretch to think that she’d be able to convince him to issue one small, insignificant order if she approached him in the right way.

Her heart thumped hard in her chest as if in warning, but the excitement that lurked in her veins overrode the fear. There were lives at stake and whatever price she had to pay would be worth it. It might not even be that bad. She would just let him kiss her, and when he was sufficiently distracted, she’d ask him to speak to his generals and that would be that. She told herself not to be nervous, to think of the rebellion and all that it stood for, but her hands still shook as she took her hair down, and her legs felt wobbly when she changed out of her day clothes and donned the plain vest and shorts she wore to bed.

When reception connected her call to his rooms and the line opened with a grunt of acknowledgement her mouth went dry.

‘I need you,’ she stuttered, and let the call drop out.

He arrived in her bedroom a minute or so later, shirtless and bleary eyed, his hair hanging untidily over his face in a skein of black.

‘What?’

Think of the Resistance, she reminded herself sternly, taking a few strides on shaking legs and flinging her arms clumsily around his neck. For the first time she felt her skin make contact with his naked flesh and she wasn’t sure if the jolt that coursed through her as their bodies connected was due to the Force link between them, or something much more physical. She had learned a little about how he liked to be kissed over the last week and she led with a mouth that was soft, half open, pressing into the centre of his firmly sealed lips before releasing and coming back for more. Then she was supposed to spend slightly longer in full contact with his mouth before pulling away and the third time she went in she should try to focus on his lower lip, giving this a slight tug when dragging back, which would coax his mouth to open.

He pulled his head up, out of reach and she popped open her eyelids in surprise.

‘What are you doing?’ His tone was hostile, and his black eyes narrowed with suspicion.

‘Apologising.’ She stretched up on her tiptoes and slid a trembling hand back over the side of his neck, up his cheek to cup his face.

He didn’t react, but the tension in his shoulders and the abrupt clench of his jaw told her that this was an effort. The heel of her palm grazed rough stubble, while her fingertips smoothed the line of his cheekbone tentatively.

‘I should have trusted you before. There was an Imperial fleet exactly where you said it would be.’

She reached up to kiss him again, running her other hand down and over his collarbone, spanning it flat over his heart. His pectoral muscle jumped in response, an instinctive reaction he couldn’t control. She still felt like she was kissing a stone though, all hard lines and edges and he’d gone long past the time when she’d expected him to start kissing her back. She began a line of chaste kisses stretching from one side of his lips to the other but her confidence failed and she faltered halfway through.

‘Am I doing it wrong?’ she whispered.

He moved then, reaching up with both hands to grasp her upper arms and placing her, gently but firmly, half a pace away.

‘You don’t have to apologise like this,’ he said, with a volume that shattered the silence of her bedroom.

Her heart thumped powerfully enough to shake her chest and she felt its reverberations at the back of her throat. Her stomach twisted into knots. She had to do better than this. People would die if she didn’t. She thrust down the nerves, took a deep breath, then seized the edges of her vest top and pulled it off over her head.

‘I want to,’ she said.

He stood perfectly still for an instant, and the only part of him that moved was his eyes. She felt acutely self-conscious, just watching him look at her but this was as far as she was willing to go and if he didn’t respond now she was out of ideas. He opened his mouth, and then the Force stepped in and did his talking for him. She’d felt the same kind of energy from him when his mother died, but this was an equal and opposite reaction – instead of falling apart, it felt like coming together, like the broken parts of him, the conflict, the doubt, were rebuilding themselves into a new structure, the shattered lines re-forged, the pieces becoming whole.

He came for her without a word, replacing her arms around his neck with a kind of reverence, his hands spreading up and across her back, pulling her tight. He buried his head in her neck and she felt his shudder in the core of her being.

‘Such a long time,’ he murmured. ‘I’ve waited such a long time for you to come to me.’

A hot pressure was his mouth against her throat, sucking a pattern of ownership into her skin. She barely noticed him, because her senses were overloading with too much sensation. Her breasts were flattened against his chest, and the texture of someone else’s skin against her nipples, so unfamiliar, so exotic, woke something inside her she hadn’t felt before. The power of the bond roared away in the background but for once it didn’t overwhelm her. She was conscious only of his body, the solid physical bulk of him surrounding her, protective and secure. She felt safe, here in the circle of his arms, and she didn’t want to leave. A creeping warmth radiated from the brand he was marking into her skin and she welcomed it – for just a fraction of time, she wanted to be his.

The memory of her mission intruded like a poke in the gut and she blurted the words she was supposed to say in an untidy rush. ‘Order the fleet to stand down.’

He froze, and the pressure on her neck fell away. ‘The fleet?’

‘The fleet of Star Destroyers. You need to tell them to stand down. Most of them are still in hibernation but if they all wake up the Resistance is lost. We will be destroyed. I need you to tell the fleet to stand down for a couple of days so we can get our bombers there to blow it up.’

He straightened slowly, removing himself from her embrace and taking a step back. The expression on his face shifted as different emotions came to the fore, none of them good – shock, horror, disgust.

‘Is that what this little display is all about?’ His eyes flicked down just far enough to encompass her chin and no lower but it was the acid in his words that had her scrambling for her discarded top and yanking it back on. ‘You’re hoping to seduce me into saving your precious Resistance?’

She crossed her arms over her chest reflexively. ‘No. I want you to save the Resistance but I’m not trying to seduce you.’

He raised a finger. ‘You’re right,’ he snapped, and she didn’t think she’d ever seen him quite so angry. ‘This isn’t a seduction. You’re prostituting yourself to me for the sake of your friends. You’re offering me sex in return for services rendered. That’s your plan – isn’t it? Isn’t it?’

She stepped back from the force of his shout. ‘I’m giving you what you want.’

‘What I want?’ he yelled, flicking a contemptuous hand at her. ‘How is this what I want?’

Rey’s temper began to fray. ‘I’ve seen it,’ she hissed. ‘You showed me, remember? You want me docile and pregnant, hanging on your every word. Your obedient little wife, ready to drop your children at a moment’s notice.’

The concussion in the Force that was his reaction to these words rocked her backwards.

‘That is not what I see,’ he shouted, face black with rage, hands fisting at his side. ‘That is not what the vision showed. I see you, at my side and you’re happy to be there. That’s what I want. That’s all I want.’

‘That’s not all you want,’ she spat. ‘You’re a liar and a hypocrite and you’re not an innocent either. You kiss me every chance you get, and you’re far too good at it for me to be the only one you’ve kissed. How many women have you slept with? They’ve left their stuff all over your room. I couldn’t seduce you if I tried.’

He took a deep breath and when he replied his words were cold. ‘I will stand the fleet down. Not because you want me to, but because it’s the right thing to do. For once in my life, I’m trying to do the right thing and you’re not helping, you’re making it harder. Maybe what happened to you with the Sith blade changed you, or maybe you’ve always been like this, but I’m not sure what side of the Force you’re supposed to be on any more. I thought you were better than this.’

He was gone before she had a chance to retort.

She stomped over to the comms relay and called Poe, who was still dressed and had obviously been waiting. ‘It’s done,’ she reported, tersely. ‘He will stand the fleet down.’

Poe tilted his head to one side, squinting. ‘What’s that on your neck?’


	11. Not so hostile negotiations

Rey managed to snatch only a few hours’ sleep and they were fraught with nightmares. The mirror in the fresher next morning displayed the stark evidence of her encounter the night before – heavy bags under her eyes and an angry looking love bite on the left side of her neck. Even pushed as high as it would go, the collar of her tunic wouldn’t hide it.

She skipped breakfast, arriving outside the conference room at the appointed time with seconds to spare. Poe checked her over and shook his head but the doors were opened before he had a chance to disapprove. She refused to look at him – sanctimonious Ben Solo, who, despite being a genocidal mass murderer, had the gall to yell at her and accuse her of being a whore. She kept her eyes on the floor, resolutely ignoring the three men on the opposite side of the table.

His droning, monotonous voice spoke first. ‘Having considered the offer made by the Resistance overnight, the First Order has decided to decline. We will not be surrendering to you today. These discussions are over.’

Rey heard the clatter of chairs being pushed back before Poe remarked silkily, ‘How much consideration did you give our offer last night, Supreme Leader? I hear there were some further negotiations in Rey’s room. From where I’m sitting it looks like those negotiations were rather more intense than we were expecting.’

There was a short, shocked silence during which Rey felt the pressure of a pair of dark eyes.

‘I gave your offer the consideration it deserved. The negotiations you refer to were unsatisfactory and quite frankly, General Dameron, I am astonished you allowed them to happen at all. My mother would never have consented to such a thing. You are a disgrace to her memory, and to the Resistance.’

‘I’m a disgrace to her memory? You were only interested in seeing her when she was dead. And that was only because Rey was kind enough to set up a meeting. You took advantage of her good nature then as well, I believe.’

‘Rey is liberal with her good nature. I wonder upon whom else she has bestowed it. You perhaps? You do seem quite upset. Or maybe you’re just annoyed because I marked the merchandise.’

There was a bang as a chair hit the floor. ‘Come on then asshole, let’s see how tough you are without that fancy torch.’

‘That’s a clear violation of the truce protocol,’ yelled Rose. ‘All use of the Force is forbidden. Stop choking him.’

‘Stand down, Supreme Leader.’ This was Hux, by the sound of it.

Rey passed a hand across her face. ‘I call a truce,’ she said, resigned.

‘We already have a truce, can’t you tell?’ General Pryde was the only one to answer.

Glancing up, Rey found Poe halfway through the process of choking to death while Rose fluttered around, trying to help him. Across the table, Ben’s face was fixed in a snarl, one hand outstretched and General Hux was tugging on his other arm in an attempt to yank him back.

‘Let him go, Ben,’ she tried again. ‘I will give you what you want.’

He broke his assault for a fraction of a second. ‘You have nothing I want.’

‘We both know that isn’t true. I will give you what you saw in that vision, the part of it you said you wanted last night. I’m too tired to fight. Stand down.’

He was vulnerable to a certain kind of persuasion. He was vulnerable now, and maybe he’d been vulnerable all his life. He so desperately wanted to be loved, wanted someone to care about him he’d come running the minute the offer was put on the table.

His fingers lowered, and Poe staggered backwards coughing, which eventually resolved itself into a warning. ‘Don’t do this, Rey. You don’t have to give him anything.’

‘I agreed to give him a second chance Poe, and I haven’t done very well at that so far.’

Ben met and held her gaze and the warring parts of him were apparent in his face. ‘I’m listening,’ he said, and seated himself opposite her, flicking a hand at his generals to leave.

She nodded at the Resistance. ‘Go,’ she ordered. ‘I’ll be fine. Don’t worry if you don’t see me for a few days.’

She hadn’t forgotten the need to buy time to destroy the fleet, but, with her eyes fixed on the man across the table, that no longer seemed like a primary motivation. Nor did saving Poe, or making up for her ill thought through seduction the night before. It was the mark on her neck that prompted her to act, and the happiness that had caused him to put it there. No one had ever felt like that about her. He was furious and insulting precisely because his feelings ran so deep.

She let the silence last until everyone else had vacated the room and then she began negotiating. ‘I don’t know you,’ she said. ‘We were never friends. All we’ve ever done together is fight and argue. Last night I made a mistake, I should have just asked for your help, but I misjudged you because I don’t really know who you are. You don’t know me either. You don’t know if I’m the sort of person who could make you happy, not really. I propose we find out. I propose we spend two days together without fighting, or arguing – we call a truce between us and we see what happens next.’

‘I know you better than you think,’ he said. ‘And we’ve done more together than fight and argue, much more. What are the conditions of this truce?’

‘Only one,’ she replied. ‘Complete honesty. Can you accept that?’

The conflict in him was apparent, suspicion and hope flying across his features but in the end, he simply nodded. ‘How do we begin?’

He’d asked her that before, but this time she had a proper answer.

‘Breakfast,’ she said. ‘I’m starving.’

The hotel restaurant was staffed only with droids, superintending a mammoth display of all the finest morning produce any inhabitant of the galaxy could possibly desire. Rey marched straight for the plates, taking one for each hand and loading both with a selection of tempting looking items, tucking some baked goods and fruit under her arm. Then she turned to see where he’d chosen to sit, finding him perched rather primly at a table set for two, a small silver cup steaming in front of him.

She swallowed down the urge to smile. It was so unusual to see him doing something so ordinary – he was all about swirling capes, extreme situations and the clash of giant cosmic forces of light and dark – so the vision of him sitting in a restaurant having breakfast was almost comic. Added to which, he was slightly too large for the crystal filigree chairs which were all the hotel had to offer and he looked decidedly uncomfortable.

‘Are you really going to eat all that?’ he asked as she set down both plates in front of her, and tumbled the rest of her booty out on the cloth.

She picked up her cutlery and prepared to tuck in. ‘Probably. I grew up poor and it’s free so why not? Don’t you eat breakfast?’

‘Never.’ He took a small sip of whatever he was drinking.

Rey shrugged, wolfing down a couple of quick mouthfuls. ‘This relationship is doomed. So, what do you do all day when you’ve finished skipping breakfast?’

‘Work. Train. Sleep.’

‘Who do you train with?’

‘People.’

He must have done this before, she reasoned. There must have been a time in his life before Snoke, before Luke and the ruined temple, before everything had gone wrong, in which he had sat across a table and had a normal conversation with someone. He must have been ordinary, once upon a time, even if he was struggling to remember it.

She shovelled something egg based. ‘The Knights of Ren? I’ve seen them on HoloNet. Do they have names? Are they Evil Ren and Scary Ren and Bad-Tempered Ren, or do you just call them Ren One and Ren Two?’

He scowled at her. ‘That’s no business of yours.’

‘I’m just making conversation. If we’re going to have children together I think we should at least talk first. ‘

The lines on his face grew deeper. ‘I said nothing about children.’

‘Ah,’ she waved her fork, splattering egg all over her lap. ‘You’ve changed your mind about the twins.’

His cup came down with a clatter. ‘Could we just leave our children out of this? For once.’

She beamed at him. ‘Then tell me about the Knights of Ren. How did you meet? Why did you join? Are all of them men? I’m interested.’

‘I don’t have to tell you my life story.’

She considered that for a while. ‘I think you do, actually.’ Loading her fork, she extended it towards him. ‘Do you want to try this, by the way, it’s delicious?’

He eyed the offer with disdain. She shrugged and continued to eat while the silence lengthened. He gave in before she did.

‘When I was training I ran a few missions with Luke. Just small things, not dangerous – investigating reports of Force sensitive individuals, tracking down holocrons. But once we were travelling in wild space and we ended up in a fight with the Knights of Ren. They were a brotherhood of military fanatics, heavily armoured, highly skilled and led by a trained Force user with a red lightsaber. His name was Kylo Ren.’

Her mouth fell open, revealing quite a lot of breakfast. ‘But I thought…’

‘That was my name?’ His smile was thin. ‘It’s a title. A prestigious one, in the right circles, but a title only.’

She swallowed with a gulp. ‘You and Luke killed him and you took his title?’

‘Not then. Luke and I lost, the Knights overwhelmed us – it was very early in my training – and we ran. But after I joined Snoke, I encountered them again.’

‘Why did you join Snoke?’

‘Stop interrupting,’ he ordered. ‘Snoke knew I had been bested by the Knights so he set me a test. Beat them, and their master, and prove my worth.’

‘And you did.’

‘I nearly didn’t. I wasn’t permitted weapons, so I fought them hand to hand and their leader nearly chopped off my arm before I managed to overpower him. He chose death rather than surrender and I took his place as leader. Now the Knights of Ren are loyal to me, and only me.’

She considered that over another mouthful. ‘Why weren’t you allowed weapons?’

He picked up his own fork, reached out and scooped up a tiny piece of breakfast from her plate. ‘It was a test.’

‘Were there a lot of tests like that? The sort that could have killed you?’

He chewed, swallowed and she edged her plate into the middle of the table.

‘Snoke pushed me off a cliff once, said I had to catch myself before I hit the ground if I wanted to live.’

‘He was joking, right? He would have caught you.’

He took a slightly larger mouthful. 'No. I would have died and he’d have found another apprentice.'

'But instead you learned how to fly.'

'I learned how to float,' he corrected. 'It's a useful skill when you're on a Dreadnaught and it suddenly starts crashing into a planet.’

She remembered that occasion with a flush of embarrassment. That had been the first time she’d kissed him – that had been her first kiss full stop, and she wondered again why it was she had initiated that kiss in the first place. Her hand raised to her neck. She also wondered why it was she’d been so eager to start undressing in front of him last night instead of having a conversation like a normal person. Maybe it was because he wasn’t a normal person and this was the longest sane conversation they’d ever had, but that didn’t feel quite right.

He nodded in the direction of her fingers. ‘’I’m sorry about that. I got carried away.’

She pulled a face, dropped her hand. ‘So did I.’

‘Has anyone taught you how to heal?’ he asked, having finished most of the remains of her breakfast. ‘It’s a light side power.’

‘Your mother taught me,’ she replied. ‘But I didn’t think to do it this morning. Can you heal it for me?’ She was curious to see how far his turn from the dark side extended.

He gestured at his face, to the place where she’d cut him. ‘’I haven’t been able to heal for years.’

She raised her hand again, preparing to slip into the right frame of mind.

‘Don’t,’ he said.

There was something in the way he was looking at her that made her pause. It brought to mind the words he’d whispered before he’d kissed that mark into her neck – about how long he’d waited. She remembered the first time she’d kissed him, how everything else around her had disappeared, and she recalled the safety of his arms and the jump of his chest when she touched him. She dropped her hand.

He cleared his throat.

‘Are you planning on training today then?’ she asked, breaking the moment.

‘Probably. Do you want to watch?’

‘I want to join in.’

‘That might be…problematic.’

‘Not necessarily,’ she replied. ‘Master.’

His eyes widened. ‘We’d have to do something about your clothes.’

‘And I have to fetch my lightsaber. Shall we meet in your shuttle in an hour?’

‘It’s a date,’ he said.

There was a bundle on the co-pilot’s seat when she arrived and she opened it as he took off. The hotel had done a good job of estimating her size by the look of it and she was even more impressed when she swished the skirts of her new ensemble in the mirror as they traversed open space. Black leggings were covered by a long black dress, split down the front and sides and fitted with tight but flexible sleeves for ease of movement. The cloak was also black with a wide hood and it shimmered slightly in the artificial light. She clipped the lightsaber to the utility belt and made her way back to the cockpit. The pilot said nothing, but he spent most of the rest of the journey sneaking sideways glances when he thought she wasn’t looking.

She followed him out of the hangar bay and out into the bustling corridors of his flagship with the hood covering her face and her head bent low. She spoke to no one, and the forbidding nature of his mask seemed to discourage anyone from speaking to him; they reached the training hall without incident. The room itself was wide and high with several distinct sections. The majority of it was given over to a blank, empty floor space with racks of weapons hanging on each of the walls. There was a separate area which had padded sides and flooring and a third which housed a collection of fitness equipment.

Four armoured figures stood ready in the centre of the fighting space, summoned by some signal she hadn’t seen. All of them bore archaic bladed weapons of one kind of another, and given that their helmets clearly admitted a very restricted view, Rey was confident that with the lightsaber she could take them all. At the sight of their black clad leader, each of the Knights gave a respectful bow of the head, but when their attention fell on Rey there was no such courtesy. A ripple ran through them, just a slight flex of a muscle here, the clang of a blade there, but enough to indicate their hostility.

Ben felt it too, because he said in a pompous tone, ‘She is mine. Lower your hood, apprentice.’

‘Yes, master.’

She complied, keeping her head bowed and a docile expression pinned on her face, conscious that the mark of ownership he had placed on her throat might be a more convincing subterfuge than a simple change of clothes.

‘You will fight the Knights of Ren,’ he ordered and her hand dropped eagerly to her lightsaber. ‘Without weapons,’ he continued, extending a finger and calling her blade.

She hesitated for a second before convincing herself that he wouldn’t let her be harmed – this was supposed to be training after all – it was more likely he’d decided to compare her performance to his own in similar circumstances.

Her four opponents moved together, fanning out until they had enclosed her on all sides, and then the fight began. Rey didn’t think she’d enjoyed herself so much in her life. The initial lack of anything with which to defend herself was swiftly remedied by a flying kick to the neck of the nearest Knight, coupled with a Force assisted disarm while he was distracted, which left her with an axe and little idea how to use it. Her lack of skill with their weapons didn’t seem to matter though, because she’d specialised in the more acrobatic forms of combat over the last year and speed was on her side. She spent most of the battle attacking in a blur from the air, while dodging their clumsy swings and ponderous strikes. She didn’t have to hold back either, she’d seen these merciless warriors in action and there was no hesitation in the way she went in for the kill – they would do the same to her, given half a chance.

They were strong, but slow and she ran rings around them while Ben looked on, a silent audience. She made only one mistake – a commandeered mace bounced off the helmet of one of the Knights, damaging it beyond repair and when the person inside flung it away with a grunt, Rey realised she’d been fighting a woman. She threw Ben a suspicious look, and her opponent took that opportunity to try severing her leg; Rey jumped back only after a long gash had opened on her thigh. In too short a time, all four Knights were disarmed, injured, unconscious or too winded to continue and Rey bared her teeth in triumph, hunting for someone else to fight.

‘Dismissed,’ Ben ordered from the side-lines and the minute her opponents had left the room, Rey summoned her lightsaber back from his grasp.

‘That was magnificent,’ he said, his eyes alight as if he shared her triumph.

She circled her blade and assumed an opening stance. ‘Now I have to defeat Kylo Ren and take his place.’

The excitement faded from his features. ‘I don’t think I want you to do that,’ he said, slowly.

‘I wasn’t giving you a choice.’ She waved her lightsaber at him.

‘You have a very tenuous grasp of the meaning of ‘truce,’ he observed. ‘I’m not going to fight you.’

She pouted. ‘Then what are you going to do?’

In response, he gave her a look that ran from her head to her toes and lingered on all the important points in between. She blushed when he stared at her lips, turned a darker shade as his eyes fell to her neck and by the time he began exploring her chest she was hot all over; when his attention dropped lower still she could feel herself breaking a sweat.

He took two paces forwards and fell to his knees, his head level with her waist, his mouth within kissing distance of her groin. Her body gave a sudden throb of heat, and she bit her lip. He was going to do it. He was going to turn his head and press his face between her legs. Her trousers would come off and she’d feel him, the tip of his tongue exploring her, his hands spreading her open as she thrust her fingers into his hair and gasped his name. He’d lick her, his mouth warm in a place that had never felt such heat and she’d groan when his fingers found the space between her thighs and filled it, once, twice, over and over until she came crying and shouting, impaled on his hand.

It was starting right now, his fingers were on her knee, her thigh, creeping upwards, so close and he was saying something. She was aware of the flush on her face, the heat in her cheeks, the readiness between her legs.

‘I said, this needs healing,’ he repeated, giving her a quizzical look.

He knelt at her feet. She found she couldn’t look away from the sight of him kneeling although it made her heart race and her breathing falter in her chest. Abruptly his eyes widened and a dull red spot of colour stained his cheeks. He dropped her leg and scooted away, regaining his feet and she realised rather belatedly that he’d been scanning for injuries before, rather than anything more personal.

Attempting to brush off her intimate reaction to his scrutiny she slipped in to a meditative trance to heal her leg and stayed in it longer than was really necessary. She was breathing normally when she came out, finding that he had tidied the training room and was preparing to leave.

‘What do you want to do next?’ The words were deliberately neutral and he couldn’t quite meet her gaze.

‘I want you to show me the dark side,’ she said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lifting from the comics for backstory.


	12. On the beach

He stilled, said carefully, ‘Why?’

‘You said last night that you didn’t know which side of the Force I was on. I go straight to the dark you said, I don’t fight it. I want you to show me how to fight it.’

‘I’m the strongest dark side user in the galaxy and you want me to show you how to fight it?’ There was a disbelieving edge to his words. ‘Surely my life story suggests I’m the last person you should ask about resisting the dark side.’

‘You won’t tell me your life story, remember? And you’re not a dark side user any more. You’ve turned back to the light. You’re the only person I know who’s changed their mind like that.’

‘I changed my mind?’ The disbelief had escalated. ‘You think it’s as easy as ‘I changed my mind’?’

‘Why did you turn to the dark?’

‘I had reasons.’

‘And why did you come back to the light?’

‘I had other reasons.’

‘Sounds like a personal choice to me.’

He gaped at her. ‘You have no idea what it’s like – the power of it. It consumes you, controls you, turns you into its slave.’

She folded her arms. ‘You don’t let it control you any more though, do you? That’s what you told me when you held my Sith saber. You control it, it doesn’t control you. You’re nobody’s slave anymore.’

‘I don’t let it control me,’ he repeated, although for a second he sounded like he was thinking about something else entirely. ‘I’m nobody’s slave.’

‘Exactly. You can hear the dark side but you don’t let it tell you what to do. I hear it too, but I’m terrible at not listening. Teach me how you do it, how you find your own strength.’

‘My own strength?’

She was obviously going a bit too fast for him. ‘I use the light, but I hear the dark and when I do it takes over. You use the dark, but you hear the light and you’ve found a way to combine the two so that neither controls you – you’ve found your own strength. Teach me how. Unless, of course, you haven’t really turned to the light at all and this is some kind of elaborate dark side ploy to get me to do what you want.’

He shook his head. ‘What exactly did you have in mind?’

‘I want another try with the Sith lightsaber.’

‘Absolutely not. You could have killed me last time.’

‘Yes, but this time we’re going to tackle it together. What was it your grandfather told you? The power we wield together is greater than either may call on alone? Together, you and I are more powerful than the dark side, or the light. If we’re together, the dark side can’t tell us what to do.’

‘It can’t, can it?’ he said, but she had the sense his thoughts were elsewhere again and he was very quiet on the way back to the command shuttle.

He didn’t snap out of his reverie until she’d landed back on Dorumaa and exited the shuttle, antique saberstaff in hand.

‘Just wait.’ He held out a hand, searching the beach where she’d landed for something. ‘Don’t open it until I’m ready.’ He strode in the direction of a large palm tree, shucked off his cloak, spread it as a blanket and sat with his back planted firmly against the trunk. Then he spread his legs, patting the space between them. ‘Come here.’

She gave him a dubious look.

‘We need physical contact,’ he explained in an overly patient tone, as if he were going too fast for her. ‘And I need to have my hands on that saber in case you start trying to chop off my head again.’

She seated herself cautiously in the gap he’d indicated, nervous of the contact it would create between her backside and his groin but he wrapped an arm around her waist with a grunt of impatience and yanked her flush against his chest. Her brain took that opportunity to remind her that he’d seen her topless and she blushed, although in this position, he couldn’t see her face. Still looped around her stomach, his arm relaxed and in that moment, she felt it too, the warmth of the connection between them establishing itself like an old friendship, comfortable and secure. It enveloped her with the promise of power, should she need it, but this time it also brought familiarity and companionship and she rested against his chest for a moment, listening to his breathing, feeling the thud of his heartbeat.

Then she lifted both hands out in front of her, bringing the saber up horizontally and he matched the position, his knuckles on either side of hers.

He blew a strand of hair away from her ear, sending a reflexive shiver down her spine. ‘Remember who you are,’ he said.

She flipped the blade open, turned it on. ‘I remember who I am,’ she replied with a grin. ‘I am Rey from nowhere. My parents were nobody. I come from nothing. I’m nothing. I have no place.’

‘None of that is true,’ he countered, but his words came from a long way away. ‘You are the last Jedi. You have a place with the Resistance. Everyone loves you – my uncle, my mother. You have friends who will defend you at the cost of their own lives. You are special.’

‘I am special.’ She wanted to move the weapon but it was fixed in place for some reason. ‘The dark side makes me special. It is the only friend I need, the only family I have. It offers me power and with it I can take whatever I want.’ She attempted to wrest the blade from its binding but it was stuck fast.

‘And what do you want?’

‘You,’ she answered with a throaty chuckle. ‘Just you, dressed all in black, sitting next to me on a throne and happy to be there. The darkness will give you to me.’

There was a long silence from the man behind her. ‘It won’t,’ he said.

‘It will.’ She wrenched the saber into a spin and it came free for a second before stopping again.

‘The Force doesn’t have that kind of power,’ he replied slowly. ‘It can’t make me love you, and it can’t make you love me.’

‘Oh, but it can,’ she laughed. ‘It can. The Force can destroy everything you have, your home, your family, your happiness and it will, it will if I let it. It will if you do not do as I say.’

‘The darkness has already taken my life.’ The deep voice behind her was quiet, and there was sadness in it. ‘I have no home; no family and I’m chasing the only happiness I’ve felt in years. But even if that weren’t the case I still wouldn’t love you. A relationship forged with the edge of a blade, in fear, is no relationship at all. It’s not real. I don’t know why I didn’t see that before.’

The restriction on her weapon fell away and she bounded to her feet, spinning the red beams in satisfaction. The Force oozed through her veins, rich and powerful; she could do anything she wanted with no fear, no recrimination and she could make him do anything she wanted too.

Two arms around her waist and the weight of a flying shoulder tackled her to the ground and she clung to the saber, wrestling for control until both her hands were above her head, flat on the sand, pinned down roughly by the man’s hands on the handle. The weight of his body crushed her into the earth.

‘This isn’t you.’ His mouth was somewhere near her ear. ‘This isn’t who you are.’

‘This is who you want me to be,’ she hissed back. ‘I sense it.’

‘I don’t want you like this,’ he said firmly. ‘I’m going to give you one last chance to fight this off, and then I’m going to kiss you.’

She was running out of air; her chest was heaving for breath and that was a problem for which the dark side had only one answer. With an effort, she separated her legs and his hips slid into the space in between, tilting the burden of his body off her lungs as she wrapped her thighs around his waist and began to rock.

‘You want me like this,’ she crooned, yanking at the pinioned blade. ‘On my back beneath you, while you put your children in my belly.’

The world went black.

When she awoke she had the sense that some time had passed. She was curled up against a familiar soft surface, black fabric against her cheek that smelt of burning and blood. Long legs sprawled on either side of her body and while one of his arms kept her propped in place, the other was moving through her hair, accompanied by a light tingling sensation. She groaned at the pain in her back of her skull, closed her eyes to make the nauseous doubling of her vision go away.

‘What happened?’ she mumbled through thick lips and a tongue like a giant pillow in her mouth.

‘I hit you with a rock. Harder than I meant to. I think you have a concussion. Is this doing any good? I can’t tell.’

Strong fingers probed at something sore and she winced, realising belatedly that he must be trying to heal her – trying, and failing. She attempted to reach backwards to explore the sore spot but her co-ordination was off and she poked him in the eye instead.

Flinching, he removed his fingers and wrapped both arms around her, tucking the top of her head under his chin. ‘Don’t move, it’ll pass.’

She didn’t want to move, it felt so good just to be held. His heart rate slowed, and his chest rose and fell gently under her cheek.

‘You need medical attention. I should get you back to the Resistance,’ he murmured after a while.

‘I don’t want to go back,’ she whispered, trying not to disturb anything about this single, perfect moment.

‘Why not?’

She exhaled a long, peaceful breath. ‘I can’t get this back there.’

‘You can’t get hit on the head and nearly brain damaged? I should hope not.’

She squeezed his arm. ‘This. I can’t get this from anyone else.’

‘Hmmmm.’ The rumble shook his chest. ‘I doubt that. I imagine there are Resistance fighters queuing up to get this close to you.’

She cracked open her eyes, levered herself off his torso. ‘I’ve never slept with Poe, if that’s who you mean.’

His hand came up and pressed her cheek back into his tunic again, then settled itself on her upper arm where his thumb drew complicated patterns onto the fabric. ‘I know,’ he said. ‘You’ve never slept with anyone.’

‘Is it really that obvious?’

‘It’s really that obvious.’

‘Then why did you accuse me of all those horrible things?’

‘I was angry. And stupid.’

‘Hmmmm.’ She made an attempt to sound casual through the awful spinning in her head. ‘How many people have you slept with?’

His thumb stopped moving. ‘Some.’

‘Some repeatedly or some just once?’

There was a noise beneath her ear that might have been a chuckle, although she wasn’t sure he was capable of humour. ‘I find your jealousy rather gratifying.’

She shifted in indignation. ‘I’m not jealous.’

‘Of course not,’ he replied, holding her a little more tightly. ‘And that item you stole from my quarters the last time you were there, you don’t need to worry about its owner. It belonged to my mother. I would like it back at some stage.’

She grimaced, remembering the flash of bright shards as she’d thrown the perfume bottle he was referring to at the wall, and decided not to reply.

The soft wash of the sea filled the space their words had left and Rey relaxed, feeling long held tension seep from her muscles, carried away on the ocean spray.

‘Why are you here with me?’ he asked at length.

She burrowed a little closer into his body. ‘Because you hit me on the head with a rock?’

‘Aside from that. I understand that today is another distraction, and you’re keeping me occupied while Dameron destroys the Imperial fleet, but you don’t have to go this far.’ She felt both his arms twitch around her in emphasis. ‘Unless there’s something I’ve missed?’

He wanted to be contradicted. There was a quality in his voice, a hesitation that wasn’t usual, a kind of badly suppressed hope that called to something inside her.

‘I can’t get this from anyone else,’ she repeated, rubbing her cheek against his chest.

‘I’m keeping you still while you recover. This is a medical necessity, that’s all.’ His voice sounded stiff, uncomfortable and she smiled to herself.

‘You’re cuddling me.’

‘I am not.’

She reached out, patted his arm, and left her hand there. ‘You give me something that no one else can. Over the last year, when we were apart, I missed you. I trained a lot, and I was always busy, and there were always people around me but...’

‘You were lonely.’

‘Yes.’

‘In crowds.’

‘Yes, especially in crowds, especially when I was with my friends.’

‘They don’t understand you.’

‘They want me to be something I’m not.’

He inhaled sharply. ‘They want you to be pure. You’re supposed to be good, to be under control always. They hold you to a higher standard than anyone else because of who you are and you’re never allowed to make a mistake. It makes you angry but you can’t show anyone so you bottle it up, you hold all the anger inside you until you can feel it all the time.’

She gave his arm another squeeze, sensing that it was no longer just her experiences he was describing. ‘They’re my friends. I can’t fight them. I can train but I can’t test myself. There’s no challenge.’

‘They can’t match you. No one can.’

‘They care about me, but they don’t trust me, not all of them. I’m frustrated, and it makes me angry and there’s nowhere to let it out. Sometimes I just want to hit something. I want to hit you.’

‘You miss the fight. That’s why you were so keen to train this morning. You miss having an equal. And there are things inside you you can’t explore alone.’

‘The darkness,’ she nodded. ‘Luke said I go straight to the darkness and I never knew why. There was no one to help me find out.’

‘Until I let you talk me into it this afternoon. You need me.’

‘People keep telling me they know me. No one does.’

‘But I do. I’m the only one who can. You will never have friends or family, you’re too different. Eventually they will turn on you, they will abandon you, they will cast you out.’

‘Is that what happened to you?’ she asked in a small voice.

‘I assume Luke never told you what happened after that night he tried to kill me. Maybe he was too busy hiding to find out. I pulled the hut down and he was buried underneath and all the other students thought I’d killed their master. They turned on me. They had always been hostile. I see that now, but at the time I thought they were my friends. I didn’t want to hurt them, I tried to explain but they came for me together, and it was self-defence. I ran. I didn’t want to hurt the rest but I had nowhere to go. I couldn’t go home. And they wouldn’t stop hunting me. I went to Snoke for help. There was no one else.’ He swallowed back something hard in this throat. ‘The same will happen to you. You think you’re part of something now but you don’t really fit in. You’ll always be alone.’

She snuggled closer. ‘I don’t feel like I’m alone. Do you?’

‘No. Not right now.’

It might have been the intangible mystical bond between them that created the sense of completion filling her chest but it felt as solid as flesh and bone, a connection created by the physical contact of body on body, something she could reach out and touch.

‘It’s getting dark,’ he noted after a while. ‘Are you fit to travel? We should get back. I’ll call a transport from the hotel.’

Wobbly, she braced herself on his shoulders and used him as a prop to climb upright. Her head still hurt but she was able to retain enough focus to heal it, at least partially. She held out her hand, calling the discarded saberstaff and clipping it to her belt next to her usual weapon. The lowering of his brows told her he didn’t approve but she ignored him, placed a hand on his sleeve.

‘My room?’

His expression lifted at that and she made the journey back to the hotel smoothly enough, only staggering into the wall a few times when she tried to reach the bed. The minute they arrived he commandeered her comms relay, sending out a flurry of commands that resulted in the appearance of a medical droid not long after, which fussed over her long enough to administer a swift acting analgesic. Behind its back she had glimpses of the extent to which Ben was making himself at home.

He’d opened the balcony door and was in the process of levitating dining room furniture outside and then, when an army of service droids turned up bearing more dishes than she’d ever seen, he supervised the setting of the table.

She followed him outside curiously. ‘Are we having dinner?’

The lights inside the apartment dimmed, leaving only the red flush of the sky and a couple of candles by which to see. He hovered next to a chair, pulled the one near her out remotely and waved for her to sit down.

‘I didn’t know what you’d like, so based on breakfast this morning I ordered everything.’

There was cutlery she didn’t recognise on the table and crockery for which the purpose was not immediately clear but she was game to try anything culinary related so she sat down and began lifting the tops off the various creations on offer. For a while there was nothing but the sound of eating, as Rey’s stomach remembered she’d skipped lunch and her dining companion made up for the fact that he’d barely had any breakfast either. It was still an odd, slightly jarring sensation to watch him manipulate his knife and fork as if he were a normal person but his presence was growing on her. He no longer seemed as out of place in her life as he’d been that morning.

He noticed she was watching him. ‘What do you want to do tomorrow?’ he asked, delicately dabbing at his lips with a napkin.

‘I think we should take advantage of Dorumaa’s greatest tourist attraction. How do you feel about turtles?’

He sat back in his chair.

‘I can see it now,’ she continued, with a slight twitch of her lips as a smile tried to escape. ‘Your hair rippling in the wind, your lightsaber glinting on your hip, an enigmatic smile on your face as you skim across the waves on a giant flipper.’

He frowned. ‘No.’

‘Or you could come to the Resistance base with me and pick out your new home.’

He exchanged his frown for a scowl. ‘No.’

‘Or we could go sunbathing.’ She was really enjoying teasing him.

His scowl escalated into a glower. ‘Or you could try ruling the Empire with me for a day. You’d get on well with Hux. He’s only slightly less annoying than you are.’

Deliberately she stretched across to his side of the table, extended her fork and stabbed a vegetable off his plate. ‘I’ll rule with you, on condition that we let the past die and start a new order together.’ She shot him a grin and popped his food in her mouth.

He replaced his cutlery on his plate and pushed the whole thing across the table at her. ‘You bailed out on that. I had to make other arrangements.’

‘What other arrangements?’

‘I put your throne back into storage.’ He was meeting her gaze steadily and his demeanour was so serious she couldn’t work out if he was joking or not. ‘Two questions. One – why would I need a new home when we’re going into exile? And two – why would I want to live on Kijimi anyway?’

She narrowed her eyes at him. He cleared the dirty dishes from the main course with a few flicks of his hand and delivered dessert with a few more.

‘Did you think I wasn’t tracking you? I’ve spent the last year following everything you’ve done. All those fund-raising events, your little meet the Jedi sessions, the public displays of power – did you think I wasn’t watching?’

‘You missed me. In an odd, creepy, dark side way, you missed me.’

‘Of course I missed you. I can’t get this level of abuse from anyone else.’

She lifted the lid off every plate, sent them winging back onto the serving trolley with a loud clatter, and then piled a large bowl with a piece of every sweet Dorumaa could supply. She jabbed two spoons into the middle of the mess and pushed the whole thing into the centre of the table.

‘I’m not going into exile with you,’ she stated, helping herself to an enormous dollop of cream.

Sitting forward, he ignored the spoon, selected a dessert fork from the array on offer, cut off a piece of cake with precise strokes and examined it from all angles. ‘Exile is a poor choice of word. I meant I’m going travelling.’

Some of the cream came down her nose as she snorted. ‘Where can you go that you won’t be recognised? Everyone in the galaxy knows what you look like. Unless you’re going to change your appearance. Your nose is quite distinctive, I should start with that.’

She smooshed the rest of the cake, shovelled some onto her spoon and jammed it into her mouth.

‘We can go anywhere we like, but there’s no challenge in staying with what you know. I’d rather explore wild space, or the Unknown Regions or even parts of the Outer Rim. I want to fight whatever’s out there and see if I can beat it.’ He made a deep incision in an unsuspecting pie and chewed it thoughtfully. ‘You should try that, I prefer it to the cake.’

She did as he suggested. ‘Me too. But you can’t just wander off to slaughter the rest of the galaxy. What about the First Order? I thought you wanted to bring it down?’

‘That’s easy. Hux and Pryde hate each other. When I disappear, there will be civil war. The Resistance can wait until it’s over and pick up the pieces, by which time we’ll be long gone.’ He coaxed some ice cream onto a clean spoon and leaned forward, holding it out for her to try. His knee brushed hers under the table.

She opened her mouth obediently.

‘Well?’

‘Horrible.’ She stuck out her tongue in emphasis. ‘How about that pink stuff?’

Obligingly, he hacked off a chunk of something that resembled spun sugar and when he offered it across the table this time, his leg stretched out and his calf came to rest against hers and stayed there. She didn’t move away, but suddenly she didn’t feel comfortable with the contact. There was something about the possessive nature of his gaze as he watched her lips part, the deliberate way he slid the spoon into her mouth so that the sugar confection slithered onto her tongue, something in the tilt of his head as he watched her swallow, that made her uneasy.

‘What do you mean ‘when I disappear’? You’re not disappearing. You agreed to stand trial.’

‘I’m not standing trial. You’re going to help me escape. Without my leadership the Order will fall apart and the Resistance can take charge, the galaxy will be safe and you and I can fly off into the sunset.’ He spooned up something gelatinous, held it out with an inquiring look.

She leaned back a little, trying to re-establish some control. She hadn’t missed the fact that he had gone back on his earlier promises, and was now including her in his vision of the future on a routine basis, and that implied she’d said yes to a question she hadn’t yet been asked.

‘You don’t need to feed me.’

‘I know. I find I quite enjoy it.’

She removed herself from tasting distance and tucked her legs under her chair. ‘What are you flying off into the sunset in? And what will you do for money when you’ve got wherever it is you’re going? Will you travel around forever fighting everything you meet? That doesn’t sound like much of a life.’

He licked at the jelly gloop himself, his tongue appearing in a brief flash of pink and she forced herself to look away.

‘You won’t have to worry about money,’ he promised. ‘I have more credits than I know what to do with. Banks don’t care which side of the Force you’re on, and neither do inheritance laws. But you’re right, I will need a new ship. We’re going to have to leave in a hurry and it won’t be safe to come back for some time.’

She was shaking her head before he’d finished speaking. ‘I can’t do this. I just can’t. I’m not ready.’

His eyebrows raised.

‘This morning we were barely on speaking terms and now you’re planning a whole life together. What changed?’ she asked.

‘Everything,’ he said. ‘And nothing. I want you by my side, I’ve made no secret of it. But I’m not putting any pressure on you, I want you to come to me when you’re ready.’

‘No pressure?’ her voice was around an octave above where it should have been. ‘We’re having a romantic dinner together. You’re feeding me ice cream and promising to take me travelling. I can’t do this with you. I can’t leave my friends and throw my life away for someone I barely know.’ She pushed her chair back from the table. ‘This isn’t going to work.’

His hand shot out faster than she could move. ‘Barely know? You know me better than anyone else alive, and I’m the only person who can understand you. I thought we established that.’

His dark eyes searched hers but she snatched back her fingers and stood as calmly as she could manage. ‘One day doesn’t make a relationship. Relationships are based on friendship, years of shared experiences, mutual trust and - and having the same opinions about things and…enjoying each other’s company.’

She was aware she was flailing but she felt like she was standing on the edge of a precipice and trying not to fall in. The more aware of her surroundings she became, the harder her stomach clenched, the sweatier her palms. The table was set for seduction, she was at the end of a day which had involved excitement, self-exploration, shared confidences and plenty of hugging and now there was a bedroom at her back and a future mapped out in front in front of her and all she had to do was acquiesce. The man across the table had shown her what he wanted from her and she’d sleepwalked herself into a situation in which he was about to get it. She took a pace away.

He rose smoothly to his feet, his face inscrutable and moved to within touching distance. ‘Relationships are based on connection, and we have that. I know you feel it. It’s in the way you kiss me, the way you look at me sometimes. It’s why you’re jealous. You suggested this truce because you wanted to explore the bond between us, to see where it would lead. Well, I know where we’re going now. Don’t you?’

‘There is no ‘us’,’ she demurred. ‘And the bond is just the Force. It means nothing.’

‘It’s alright to be afraid,’ he said softly.

Her chin came up. ‘I’m not afraid. I just don’t want what you’re offering.’

His shoulders hunched, as if he were either going to start shouting or hit something, and his eyes darkened under lowering brows. Then the moment passed and his face was calm again, his voice level as he took a step back.

‘I apologise for making you feel under pressure and I appreciate your honesty. I should go now. Good night.’

He made to move around her and she blinked in surprise. ‘Wait – that’s it? You’re going to let me go just like that?’

He didn’t hesitate, stepping across the threshold and starting across the apartment in the direction of the door. ‘Of course. I can’t make you love me if you don’t want to.’

‘But...’ she stammered. ‘Aren’t you even going to try?’

Thumbing the door panel he turned back, just for a moment. ‘I’ve been trying all day,’ he said.


	13. Names beginning with L

The instant the door hissed closed she realised that she didn’t want him to go. It hit her like a physical pain, his sudden absence slamming into her chest and making her reel. She stood amongst the jumbled plates and the melting ice cream, candles guttering in the last breath of twilight, the ocean behind her singing a sad song of loss. Gritting her teeth, she attempted to push it away, her old friend abandonment, but the habit had been inside her for too long and she couldn’t avoid the sting.

He had left her alone, as everyone did in the end and she should be used to it by now. Except that this time it was self-inflicted. This time she’d told him she didn’t want him and he’d left, after putting up no more than a token objection. Somewhere deep down she’d expected him to fight, wanted him to even. He was planning a future with her, he’d made it clear on a number of occasions that he had feelings for her and every time she pushed him away he kept coming back. But this time he’d let her go. She’d said she wasn’t interested and he’d left all of that future behind and walked away. She would have believed that this was all some kind of dark side ploy, or written it off as lack of interest on his part if the mark on her neck hadn’t demonstrated otherwise.

He loved her and he’d let her go. And why?

Because he knew he couldn’t force her to love him back.

Because he valued her happiness more than his own.

Because he wasn’t the man she thought he was.

The fact that he wasn’t currently attempting to fight her into submission, or even seduce her into bed suggested she’d misjudged him yet again. The Kylo Ren she knew was dead, but she was having more trouble burying him than Ben was.

It wasn’t love that hastened her steps towards the door, she had little enough experience but she was fairly sure love wasn’t supposed to feel like this. Love was warm arms and gentle words and not this jabbing pain in her gut and the prickle of tears behind her eyelashes. It was the loss of the connection that sent her after him. He was awkward and difficult but there were times when he unbent himself enough to tell her a secret, or steal food from her plate, or cuddle her unashamedly when she thought that with enough smoothing of the rough edges, she might find a hole in her life into which he would fit. They had a connection, the excitement which troubled her every time she met him showed her that, and that connection was something she hadn’t found with anyone else. Having experienced it, she no longer wanted to be alone.

She stabbed at the door controls and it took an age to cycle open but luckily the hotel was so large that he hadn’t yet made it to the end of the corridor.

‘Wait,’ she called, conscious of the pleading tone in her voice. ‘Don’t go.’

He turned, but he didn’t start the journey back. ‘Good night, Rey.’

She thrust out a hand, yanked him back by Force but he fought off the compulsion halfway down the corridor and trudged in her direction on his own, with a wary look on his face.

‘Stay with me.’ She tried to make it sound casual. ‘We haven’t finished talking.’

He sighed, leant against the wall and regarded her with resignation. ‘You only want me to stay so you’ll have time to destroy the fleet. Be my guest. I’m not going to stop you. We’ve been through this before.’

‘No, stay with me because I want you to.’ That was what he wanted to hear, she was sure. It was embarrassing to say the words though, she’d never had to make that kind of admission before.

‘You don’t. You’re not ready. You don’t even know what you’re asking.’

‘I do. You say I’m not alone. Prove it.’ She sounded much braver than she felt.

‘Are you coming into exile with me?’

She shook her head. ‘I can’t just leave.’

His face tightened and he pushed off the wall. ‘Then I won’t stay.’ Reacting to something he read in her expression, he reached out a hand and ran his knuckles over her cheek. ‘I don’t want one night, Rey. I want a future.’

She chewed her lip. ‘I could visit,’ she offered, without having thought it through. ‘After you leave I can find you through the Force and I can visit you and you can visit me. We can get to know each other better and… see what happens.’

It was a concession only, not the commitment he wanted, but he was vulnerable to a certain kind of persuasion, and he didn’t seem able to prevent himself from jumping at every chance she offered. She felt that same sense of cohesion from him again, the same reassembling of pieces that meant his emotions were slotting into place to form a different pattern. This time it was peaceful though, a quiet contentment rather than the possessive outburst of the previous night.

The smile he gave her was almost shy. ‘I’d like to see what happens now.’

‘What’s going to happen now?’ she half whispered.

He shrugged. ‘You’re going to learn to trust me.’

Her heart gave a sudden lurch in her chest and all the sick excitement she’d ever felt rose in her belly, bringing an acid burn to the back of her throat, a tremble to her hands. She recognised it. This was fear. She’d been afraid before, more than once, afraid of a fight, afraid of being left, afraid of dying alone but this was a more insidious terror. It wasn’t him she was afraid of, not the warmth in his eyes, the way his shoulders had relaxed, the certainty he was planning to take her to bed.

This was what she’d been scared of all along, since the minute he’d knelt at her feet and told her he wanted to come home. This was why she’d found it so hard to trust him – fear of the power he’d have over her if she did. It was frightening, how vulnerable she would make herself, how open she’d be to hurt if she let herself give in, if she let herself love him back. She had been alone for such a long time the walls she’d constructed around her heart were impenetrable, no one could hurt her because no one could get in. But she wanted the connection, she wanted to chase that spark of something between them and see where it would lead.

She swallowed the fear, and stepped backwards through the open door. He followed, moving forward as she retreated, never breaking her gaze. Across the tapestry strewn floor, she trod carefully until the bed hit the back of her knees and she had nowhere left to go; she had never felt more like prey in her life and she quailed before his advance.

But he put his arms around her and the fear fell into nothing.

His chest smelt of the sea tonight, the fabric having taken on a salt tang from the time they’d spent outdoors, mixed with candle smoke and the faint suggestion of something sweet. He was so large she was lost in his embrace, enclosed and shuttered away from the world outside by the wall of his body holding her close. The Force spoke to her silently of the power that existed in their coming together but it was in the background of her awareness now, no longer the unstoppable onslaught it had been when she’d first touched him. Now the contact she felt was almost entirely physical, concentrated in the brush of his cheek against her hair, his leg against her thigh, his palm against her back.

At length she lifted her head to look at him, finding herself falling into the darkness of his eyes, and she raised her hand to trace the twist at the corner of his mouth with a fingertip. He was wearing the expression she’d seen once in a vision, the happiness that had sat so oddly on him before now manifesting itself in front of her. He smiled again, and she realised he was waiting for her to kiss him.

She began where she’d left off, stretching up on tiptoes to continue the line of kisses from last night, little glancing touches that teased his mouth open. His hands came up, sealed themselves on either side of her face and tilted her head back, then he took possession of the kiss. She was lost in it immediately, the rush of sensation when his tongue pushed past her lips, the joy of feeling her body interlocking with his as her arms twined around his neck and her ankle wrapped his leg.

She kissed him back and the power she had over him sang in her blood as he shuddered and trembled at each flick of her tongue in his mouth, at the increasing pressure of her hips as she pushed herself against him, struggling for closer contact. He thrust her away in the end and she stood silently, cheeks hot, lips already bruised as he released the catch on his belt, flung off his tunic and stripped away the shirt beneath. She explored his chest with nothing but her eyes and the lightest brush of her fingertips, learning the old injuries, the scars, the bunch of muscles underneath as he reacted to her touch.

His eyes were burning, black as the night outside when she put her mouth to his skin and learnt the taste of him, the salt tang and the heat of him on her lips, the texture of his flesh on her tongue. He was breathing hard by the time she’d kissed her way to his right nipple and the groan he let out when she licked it was the most erotic thing she’d ever heard.

It was surprisingly easy to seduce him, she decided, watching his eyes flicker shut and his fists clench simply because she’d grazed him with her teeth. If she’d known last night that all she had to do was touch him and he’d do whatever she wished she’d never have taken her top off. She kissed a line down his stomach and listened to him whimper her name. It was clear that he was trying to take this at her pace because he knew she was inexperienced and was trying not to rush her into anything she wasn’t ready for. As she knelt to fumble with the fastening of his trousers she was aware that his pulse was racing, he was flushed and there was something very large against her cheek that hadn’t been there before.

He stepped back suddenly, kicked off his boots and yanked down his trousers, shoving them into an untidy mess of fabric before pulling her clumsily back to her feet. He pressed her against his body and this time his kiss was urgent, rough and getting more desperate as her fingers explored the fabric of his underwear, outlining the straining contents. She let herself be kissed, but all her attention was on the hard length she grasped tight in her palm, the movement and the give around the damp end, the heavy hang of the skin beneath.

He broke the kiss, pressed his forehead to hers, gasping for air. ‘Do you trust me?’ he whispered brokenly.

More certain now, she nodded and found that within a second or two he’d snapped her around, put his chest to her back, released the fastenings on her dress and was palming her naked breasts, his erection rubbing against her bottom.

She said nothing but ‘oh’ at the sight of his hands spanning her chest, kneading her flesh but his fingers brushed her nipples and a rush of excitement shot from her belly to her groin, forcing her to draw a shaky breath. He rolled her skin between his fingers, the pressure and the friction drawing a cry from her throat and her body reacted in an instinctual fashion, her nipples rising into firm peaks that he pinched and caressed until she was pressing herself into his hand with the pleasure of it.

She watched herself responding, a red flush spreading across her chest, her heart thumping in her ears while one of his hands slipped lower and his mouth fastened on the side of her neck. She barely felt it, focused on the steady creep of his fingers over her belt, under the waistband of her leggings, inside her underwear, between her legs.

The jolt as his finger found the right place was like a surge of lightning across her nerves. She’d touched herself before, she wasn’t that much of an innocent, but to have someone else do it was a totally different sensation. His index finger was so much larger, the point of contact so much wider, the pressure he exerted so much greater that a moan ripped out of her throat before she could stop it.

The sucking on her throat stopped, and she could have sworn she felt him smile against her neck. One hand pinched her nipple while his finger stroked between her legs and the twin pleasure and pain seemed to collide inside her. She melted against his body, spreading her thighs and surrendering to whatever he wanted to do next.

‘Ben,’ she heard herself say, feeling the rub of his finger and the tremble of approaching orgasm threading through her stomach.

‘No one…’ he growled, yanking his finger out of her knickers and dropping to his knees in front of her.

‘On the light side of the Force…’ he made short work of removing her boots and chucked them over his shoulder.

‘Would wear this dress…’ her leggings and underwear were peeled off her hips and joined the boots.

‘And look at me the way you looked at me today.’

She was naked under her skirts, her breasts exposed and the fabric only secured by the belt still firmly attached around her waist.

‘So now…’ he put a palm on her stomach and pushed her backwards so that she fell flat onto the bed.

‘I am going to do exactly as you asked…’ he nudged her knees apart and scrambled between her thighs.

‘And show you the dark side.’

He flicked her skirts to one side, put his head between her legs and she propped herself on one elbow to watch.

‘It consumes you,’ she whispered as he spread her open and his tongue settled on her clitoris.

She arched into the moment, the wetness and the licking, the sloppy noises and the slippery friction and above all his eyes watching her as she writhed against his mouth.

‘It controls you,’ she said when he worked his finger slowly and carefully into the tight place inside her for the first time.

She clenched her fists and he eased her past the discomfort of it with another barrage of tongue until she relaxed and a second finger attempted to join the first. It took a while of concentrated patient attention with his mouth before she could disengage her instinct to reject the intrusion and release the tight internal clench that was stopping his progress. Two fingers slid between her legs and she spread herself wide, the orgasm now washing around her body, her muscles tensing for the moment it would spill over. She reached out, put her hand on the back of his head and he closed in, flicking at her clitoris with the very end of his tongue and she felt a third finger stretching her out.

‘It turns you into its slave,’ she managed and then it was too much and she came on his face, on his hand, the climax wrung from her lips with a cry and he worked her through it, fingers and tongue in a steady rhythm between her legs.

She flopped back on the covers as soon as it was over, her eyes on the ceiling and although the orgasm he’d just given her had made her physically prepared, she wasn’t sure she was mentally ready for what was going to happen next. She shut her eyes to try to force away the fear but it had a hold of her and wouldn’t let go. The bed shifted as his weight settled on it and he adjusted her position slightly, lifting her hips with one hand, pushing her knee to one side with the other.

From the feel of the brush against her entrance, his cock was going to be commensurate with the rest of him and for the first time she regretted all those occasions on which she’d thought favourably about how tall he was, how wide. She took the first inch or so with a grimace but then her muscles contracted involuntarily and his thrust stalled, went into reverse.

‘No names beginning with ‘L’,’ he said, and it was so unexpected that she popped open her eyes in surprise.

He hovered above her, the skin around his mouth red and his forehead creased with concern.

‘Names beginning with?’ she began.

‘For the twins,’ he clarified quickly. ‘Our twins. A boy and a girl. No names beginning with ‘L’. I thought we could call them Kyle and Kyla. What do you think?’

She stared at him for a brief second, at the twinkle in his eyes and the sudden suggestion of a smile on his lips and she couldn’t help it. She laughed. It was so ridiculous, so utterly out of character and so at odds with the tension inside her that once she started laughing, she couldn’t stop.

He sheathed himself with a single smooth thrust but she continued to laugh even as she felt the burn between her legs and the stretch when he pulled out and used his weight to power into her again.

‘I can’t believe it,’ she spluttered, the breath whooshing out of her chest in time with his slow, deliberate strokes. ‘I’m fucking Kylo Ren and he’s telling me jokes.’ She squinted up at him. ‘If that was a joke?’

He eased in and out of her with an increase in speed. ‘That was the only one,’ he confirmed. ‘I haven’t got a routine or anything.’

She chuckled again, fully relaxing at last and his shoulders flexed as he brought his hips forward with a touch more force. The pressure inside her was intense, the emotions equally so; she’d let no one else know her like this and whatever happened next, he’d always be her first. He seemed to pick up on the thought because the amusement fell away and he glanced down the bed. She raised her head to track what he saw. She was still half dressed, but her chest was exposed and her breasts bounced with every thrust of his hips, her legs were spread and his naked backside heaved between her thighs, pushing his cock in deep. She shuddered at the sight of what she’d become, wanton and debauched, the illicit thrill of it racing through her loins.

He met her gaze and his face was darker now, his voice deeper. ‘Say it again,’ he ordered.

She knew what he meant. ‘I’m fucking Kylo Ren,’ she whispered and the impact of these words was immediate.

His pace increased, her whole body shifting with the force of his strokes as he rammed himself into her again and again. There was tension in his shoulders, sweat beading on his temples and she put her hands on his chest tentatively.

‘Again,’ he gritted, closing his eyes.

‘I’m fucking Kylo Ren,’ she admitted, his arms buckled and he dropped his weight on top of her with a groan.

His cock pumped hard between her legs, building to a couple of short, sharp pounding jerks that made his entire body shake and he buried his face into the sheet beside her ear, panting hard.

‘I bet you wish you hadn’t,’ he murmured, extracting himself none too gently and stomping off to the bathroom.


	14. The turtles of Dorumaa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!

She lay there for a minute, unsure what to do next, but the sensation of something dribbling out of her body and soaking into the bed was unpleasant and she sat up, wincing. The belt she was still wearing had cut into her waist and the black dress itself was ripped in a few places, stained with either her orgasm or his in others, so she threw it into the corner with the rest of her clothes. There was no escaping the ache between her legs, and the sore spot on her neck was going to be another love bite.

She hobbled in the direction of the bathroom but hesitated outside the door. This was her bedroom but was she supposed to knock? It was too late to preserve anyone’s privacy, she’d already seen him naked so she pushed open the door slowly and found him braced over one of the sinks staring into the bowl, from which she caught a faint tang of mint.

He didn’t look up. ‘I did that wrong,’ he said heavily. ‘I’m not used to it meaning anything. I was too rough. You’d have been better off trusting someone else.’

She wasn’t listening. ‘What happened to your back?’

His skin was scarred with two large plasma burns, one running in a diagonal line from his left shoulder to his right hip and the other horizontally bisecting his spine. The first was a thin white line which had the distinctive regularity of a lightsaber blade but the second was much deeper, still faintly red in places and it had gouged away chunks of flesh, leaving his back with irregular ridges and hollows. That these marks existed at all was stark evidence of the fact that he’d been injured and had no access to proper medical attention for long enough that bacta would have been ineffective. That he was still walking, particularly after the second strike could only be testimony to his will to survive. Someone had hit him, and they’d hit him from behind, while he wasn’t looking, or, she realised, while he was running away. This was what the other students from Luke’s temple had done to him.

‘I already told you,’ he muttered.

She crossed the room as fast as she was able, ran her fingers over the worst of the wounds. ‘This was why you went to Snoke wasn’t it? You were dying. You had no choice.’

His eyes met hers in the mirror and they were filled with disgust. ‘I wasn’t dying. Of course I had a choice. Don’t be so ready with your forgiveness.’

She frowned at him. ‘Don’t you want to be forgiven?’

‘No. Not by you,’ he brushed past her and she staggered but he caught her with an outstretched hand.

‘Why not?’ she stroked his arm, striving to soothe the distress she read in his face. ‘You promised me complete honesty. I’ve been honest with you.’

His gaze flinched away. ‘You’re too honest. You’re too…’ he flicked a hand. ‘Everything. You just gave me…and you were scared and I… the things I made you say…and now you can’t even walk properly so don’t forgive me. It makes me feel worse.’

She poked him in the chest. ‘I’m not a child. If I’d wanted you to stop I’d have said so. But if you think you made a mistake then that’s fine. You’re allowed mistakes. Make amends.’

He glanced at her quickly from the corner of his eye, then glued his gaze to the floor. ‘How?’

She moved to face the mirror, eyed the damage critically. ‘Help me heal.’

She shifted focus, fell into the trance state through which she was at one with the Force but before she could raise her hand to her neck the power she was channelling was supercharged, as a naked dark side user wrapped around her back. His hand overlaid hers and when she touched her neck the bruise disappeared instantly. She moved to the next mark and he kept his fingers on top of hers although his reflection was still steadfastly refusing to meet her stare. She pulled both hands to her waist, ran along the red welt the belt had left, erasing it and then she took a breath, and slid their fingers downwards.

The Force worked its magic, easing strained muscles, smoothing out jangled nerves, removing incipient bruises but it wasn’t the Force she was concentrating on. She was looking in the mirror. Two figures stood there and both had a hand between her legs, cupping the mound at the apex of her thighs. Just the sight of him touching her jumped her heart into a higher gear and a flash of pink spread across her chest.

He was looking at her now, his eyes full of confusion, but she knew what she wanted and she wasn’t confused at all. Slowly, she extracted her hand from underneath his, and placed it on top instead. His eyes widened.

‘Again?’ he queried, as if he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing. ‘You still want me to? After I…’

She said nothing, just laid her index finger on top of his and exerted pressure, pushing his digit between her folds until it lay against her clitoris. She was still sensitive and the slightest touch made her shudder but he took up the invitation and began to move gingerly, her hand guiding him on direction and speed.

This was exactly what she wanted, she thought, as she maintained eye contact with him in the mirror and watched him finger her into another climax. She hadn’t minded what he’d asked her to say earlier because she was honest enough with herself to know that it was Kylo Ren she was fucking, at least in part. There had been plenty of men in the Resistance camp, and even some in her early life on Jakku but she had never really wanted any of them. They were safe, suitable, sensible choices, and she could have had the relationship she’d described with them – one based on friendship and trust built up over years. But there was something about the man in the mirror that attracted her more than any of the safer options ever had. He was as fierce, as passionate, as prone to excess inside the bedroom as he was out of it. Maybe it was the darkness in him that broke down her barriers. She’d never been able to fight it, she ran towards it without a thought for the consequences.

She trembled beneath his touch. He was hard against her leg. Without breaking rhythm, he reached out and hooked something with his foot, dragging it across the tile. There was a high stool against her right knee, helpfully provided for the use of any guest who preferred to sit at the sink rather than stand. Ben’s eyes fixed hers in the mirror. She clambered onto the stool and with his free hand he guided both of hers onto the edge of the sink, bending her forward.

She felt the head of his cock slide against her bottom and she spread her knees apart, bent her back and gave him a nod to indicate readiness. This time when he filled her it felt completely different. Being entered in this position put a new angle on the penetration and the friction between her legs was immediately pleasurable rather than something to be tolerated as it had been last time. Her fingers tightened on the sink.

He studied her face, drawing back gently and sliding in again, pushing deeper this time. A tingle of excitement brought a gasp to her lips. He moved again, too tentative and the pleasure lessened.

‘Harder,’ she whispered, looking him right in the eye.

The finger working her clitoris increased its speed and a jolt of rapture leapt inside her when his cock thrust in again. She nodded and continued to nod as the force of his strokes ramped up. She arched her back, presenting a barrier so that when he banged into her the impact was harder, her climax that bit closer. His free hand clamped onto her hip, holding her fast.

The mirror reflected her approval – a red faced woman stared back, panting and desperate and when her mouth moved it said ‘Faster.’

She forgot herself, forgot everything but the feel of his cock splitting her open, stuffing her cunt with all its wide and glorious heat while his finger blurred at the parting of her thighs. She watched as Kylo Ren fucked her, hard and fast and she wanted him to do it, wanted him as much as she’d ever wanted anything in her life; the sheer joy in his eyes told her he wanted it too.

She backed into his thrusts, striving to take as much as he could give. ‘More,’ she demanded. ‘More.’

He gave her everything he had and by the end he was sweating freely, his face a mask of concentration while she couldn’t keep still, moaning and crying out and urging him on with a stream of filth she’d never dared utter before.

She wasn’t looking at him when she came. She didn’t need to. She closed her eyes and she could feel him inside her far more intimately than the simple slide of body into body. The connection between them bound them together, the Force and the physical union now working as one. The tension built into a peak and erupted; stars turned the darkness behind her eyes to flashing colour and from somewhere behind her she was aware of him shouting her name.

The orgasm was so intense it robbed her of the ability to form a coherent sentence and her legs shook so much through the excess of passion that she was unable to hold herself in position, sliding down the stool. She was dimly aware of being lifted, carried and settled beneath cool sheets.

Before sleep took her a kiss was pressed to her shoulder and then she caught a whisper in the dark, words not meant for her ears, words she might only have dreamed.

She woke to a cold bed, an empty bedroom, though which a strange white light played. The temperature seemed to have dropped significantly and she shivered, goose bumps rising on her arms. Ben was nowhere to be seen. Rey felt a brief flicker of disappointment at his absence, before a glance at the time told her she’d slept late and half the morning had already passed - no doubt he’d got bored of waiting for her to wake up and had gone back to his own quarters. She sat up, stretching out the kinks in her back and tested out the feel of this new, slightly altered body. All trace of discomfort had faded and she felt well rested, relaxed although also – she sniffed – in need of a bath.

Slinging the sheet around her against the chill she padded in the direction of the bathroom to freshen up, but the unmistakeable chink of fancy crockery halted her halfway through cleaning her teeth. She followed the noise out onto the balcony, finding Ben seated at the dining table with a cup in one hand and a data pad in the other, his hair damp above the collar of a fluffy white bathrobe.

He gave her a brief, startled look and she could sense his hesitation before he pushed back his chair, strode over to where she stood and after another second of internal prevarication, kissed her on the forehead.

‘Hello,’ he said.

She smiled back; he smelled fresh, citrus-tangy this morning and his proximity set off a quick throb of memory in her groin. ‘Morning,’ she said.

This was going to be normal, she decided. This was how they were going to define ordinary, just a kiss on the forehead and a daily greeting and a chat over breakfast. Then her eye caught something behind his shoulder and her jaw dropped. She stumbled over to the edge of the balcony, clamped her fingers on the railings.

In front of her the sea was now ice. It had been frozen in the middle of a storm, giant crests standing poised to crash down on the shore, their depths emerald green, froth captured sparkling in each cap. Between the waves, the seabed emerged in patches of sand and dark rock, like creeping mould against the crystalline beauty of the surf.

‘Did we do that?’

Only the Force would have enough power to pause an ocean, and only when it was in the hands of the last remaining couple able to use it.

He moved to stand at her side, rested his hand on top of hers and gave it a squeeze. ‘As flattering as it is that you become so distracted by our interactions, I doubt that the inhabitants of Coruscant or the turtles of Dorumaa would approve.’ He caught her expression, backtracked rapidly. ‘I’m sure the sea isn’t frozen over the whole planet, it’s probably just the part we can see. All the wildlife will have survived.’ He didn’t sound convinced.

She turned her palm over, laced their fingers together. The connection between them was now so established she could join her fluttering control to his restless energy without requiring any further contact at all. She focused, gestured and the ice creaked and shifted, steam rising from the waves as they began to melt and fall.

‘I don’t understand how this happened.’

He didn’t release her hand, but dropped the bundle of fingers so they stood side by side, watching the ice melt. This was going to be normal, she thought, this casual physical contact between them. She’d be able to reach for him any time she liked and find him there, and he’d touch her any way he wanted.

‘You get distracted. You lose yourself too easily in what we’re doing. You don’t fight it. It’s like when you go straight to the dark, you stop thinking about anything else.’

‘And what were you thinking about? This was a joint effort. I didn’t go massacring reptiles on my own.’ Her nails bit into the back of his hand.

He shifted the contact swiftly, repositioning his grip so that they were now palm to palm, his skin at a greater distance from any further injury she might want to cause.

‘I was thinking about you.’ The way he said it was so simple, the expression on his face so honest that she didn’t have the heart to criticise.

‘Then how do I stop this happening again?’

His thumb slipped into the space between their hands, stroked her palm. This too would be normal, she thought, this demonstration of affection. Maybe one day he would put his arm around her as they walked. Maybe she’d rest her head on his shoulder.

‘Learn control. You’ll have plenty of opportunity to practice.’

She thought about that for a minute, although the stroking was becoming distracting. ‘Wait. This has only happened twice, once on your ship and once last night and both times we were occupied. That means I can only practice when I’m…when you’re making me…when we’re…’ she searched for the word he’d used. ‘Interacting.’

He said nothing, but the way he looked at her spoke volumes. She felt the excitement burning her stomach, raw and dangerous, the sudden bang of her heart in her chest, the tightness of her throat as she swallowed. This was never going to be normal. She was never going to get used to this. Somehow overnight he’d discovered the power to stare at her and turn her into a quivering mess, probably because last night he’d used his body to turn her into a quivering mess and now every time he looked at her in a certain way she was reminded of exactly how that had felt, and how much she wanted him to do it again.

‘What are you reading?’ her voice was squeaky. She gestured at the table in an attempt to change the subject.

‘I was shopping. I bought a freighter.’

She felt much as if the melting waves had crashed on top of her.

‘I can show you if you like. It’s fast but subtle. Blends in. The main cabin’s a bit small though, and I’ll have to get the weapons systems upgraded but it’ll do for a while. Do you want to see?’

‘When are you leaving?’

She made to pull her hand back but a frown developed between his eyebrows and he clung on tighter, picking up her other hand to complete the set.

‘Tomorrow,’ he replied. ‘Assuming the Resistance destroys the Sith fleet today. If Dameron has any sense he’ll launch an attack straight afterwards, while the First Order are still reeling from the fact that their back up navy has been wiped out. Pryde and Hux will look to me for leadership but I’ll already be en route to collect the freighter and ditch my shuttle.’

‘Where will you go after that?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘You don’t know, or you won’t tell me?’

‘It isn’t you I don’t trust, it’s everyone else.’

‘So that’s it? You’re going to leave everything behind, just like that? The throne, the First Order, all that power – you don’t need it anymore?’

‘I’m not leaving everything behind. You’re still going to visit me, aren’t you?’

She nodded.

‘Then I will have all I need.’

‘And what about your grandfather – this all started with him. Are you going to tell him you’re leaving?’

‘I think that would be a spectacularly bad idea.’

‘You said I could meet him.’

‘There won’t be time for that now.’ He tipped his head to one side, gave her a questioning look. ‘If I didn’t know better, I’d say you didn’t want me to go. Yesterday you told me you weren’t ready to join me and today you’re upset because I’ve stopped planning a life together. What changed?’

‘Everything,’ she shrugged. ‘And nothing.’

He pulled her into a hug, pressed a kiss to the top of her head. ‘You’ll be hard to leave.’

There wasn’t going to be a normal. She stood there in his embrace and acknowledged the truth she’d been trying to pretend didn’t exist. He wasn’t normal and he wasn’t ordinary, he was never going to settle into the sort of domestic life that would involve cosy chats across the breakfast table and walking along the beach holding hands. He was all about swirling capes, extreme situations and the clash of giant cosmic forces of light and dark and his idea of a future was travelling around the galaxy fighting everything he met. The relationship was - as she had predicted at around the same time yesterday morning - doomed.

He pulled back, tipped up her chin with a knuckle and she found she recognised the look in his eyes. She was starting to get used to him, his expressions, the way he moved, how he tasted. She threaded her arms around his neck and relaxed her mouth in anticipation. Without the pressure of her armpits the sheet she was wearing unspooled and fell away and he tightened his grip as he bent for the kiss, pulling her in with one hand on her naked backside.

Eyes closed, his tongue invading her mouth, his fingers spreading possessively across her bottom she decided she didn’t want normal anyway. This was what she wanted, this moment of connection, the release that came with being joined to someone who knew her as no one else could. Someone who knew that she wasn’t normal either.

His hand slipped between them and unfastened the tie of his robe, pushing it aside and she felt his skin against hers, the evidence of his desire for her bumping her stomach. This was something she was getting used to as well, the impact his proximity could have on her, the way he could make her want him so easily. Both hands were on her backside and then, in combination with a subtle push from the Force he lifted her, spreading her legs to circle his waist. She was split around the base of his cock and it rubbed between her thighs; she shuddered at the new sensation. He lifted his hands, shifting her hips upwards, dragging her clitoris up his length and then allowing her to slide back down again. The feel of it was all hard, hot friction and she crossed her ankles over his back, enthusiastically taking control of her pleasure in grinding her hips against his erection, kissing him so deeply her jaw began to ache.

While she was occupied he moved, walking slowly and carefully back into the bedroom and manoeuvring himself into a sitting position on the bed. He released her mouth and pushed her pelvis up, forcing her to kneel with her legs braced on either side of his hips. Licking a shining trail down her chest, his tongue swooped in and out of the hollow of her throat, over her collarbones and only stopped when he’d reached her right breast, swirling a spiral round it that ended with her nipple in his mouth and her hands on the back of his head. He sucked delicately on the hardened flesh, his fingers coming up to squeeze and roll its twin and she gasped. Excitement boiled in her stomach, born of the expression in his eyes as he gauged her reaction, swapping his flicking, soothing tongue and alternating full-on suction to her left breast instead. She loved this. She loved watching him do things to her that no one else had ever done. She loved the raptness of his attention and the way he was so eager to learn what she liked. She loved the excitement he was adept at building inside her.

She bucked her hips but his free hand was braced behind him, holding him up and there was no relief to be had from that quarter. She slid her fingers between her legs instead and she felt him jump as he realised from the little movements she was making what was going on. He had his mouth full so he didn’t say anything, but his eyes were glowing with approval and soon a warm palm was inching its way up her inner thigh. His finger entered her smoothly, just one at first, testing for resistance, and she clenched herself around it with a moan of rapture. Whatever he said was smothered by her aching flesh as her back arched and she thrust her chest further into his mouth. She kept her eyes open though, letting him see how much she liked the second finger when he pushed it inside her and what it did to her when those fingers began to move.

She massaged the place between her legs, working up a climax as his fingers fucked her, driving deep and then curling to hit the spot that had made her come so hard the night before. He didn’t let her reach the edge though, releasing her breasts with a final pop and extracting his hand, lying flat on the bed as he positioned her to take his cock.

Instead, she slithered away to kneel on the floor between his legs and he got as far as ‘What are you?’ before she put him in her mouth.

Her lips stretched wide around him and the taste was unpleasant at first, thin and bitter on her tongue but she attempted to emulate what he’d been doing to her breasts and sucked until her cheeks hollowed and his face had gone bright red. She took pity on him only when she’d run out of air.

‘I’m sucking Kylo Ren,’ she said, because he’d seemed to enjoy the filthy language she’d used before.

He frowned, rather to her disappointment. ‘I think we can dispense with the jokes.’

She stuck out her tongue and licked a leisurely route all the way from the root of his erection to the tip, earning a flicker of his eyelids when the pleasure registered. ‘Don’t you want me to talk to you?’

‘Rey,’ his voice was uneven, and his breathing turned ragged the faster she flicked the head of his cock with her tongue. ‘At the moment I’d rather your mouth was too full to say anything at all.’

She obliged, opening it as wide as she could and taking as much of him in as possible. He groaned, and the groan turned into something much more animalistic when she met his gaze, his cock deep in her mouth, that taste flooding over her tongue, and she bobbed her head, swallowing him down. She couldn’t fit him all in without feeling like she was going to gag, so instead she clamped her fist around the part she couldn’t manage and pumped up and down in time with the movements of her head.

He endured her attentions for a few minutes, no more and then, with a movement that was both hasty and desperate, he grappled for her arms and hauled her back on top. This time both his hands were on her hips, holding her steady as she straddled him and the penetration, when it came, stretched her open inch by slow and steady inch until he had sunk deeper than anything she’d felt before. She struggled to adjust to the feeling, to the extreme fullness between her legs but his thumb worked at her clitoris to wake the excitement that would leave her wanting even more than she already had.

Her body told her to move, instructed her to get rid of the intrusion and she raised herself higher but the hand on her hip guided her firmly back down, impaling her again. She shuddered with the force of it, the rub and the friction inside sending a tide of pleasure through her strong enough to arch her back, locking her muscles. She rose up again, no longer trying to escape and again he pushed her down, this time raising his hips to meet her halfway. She bought her hands up to his chest for leverage, sliding up for a third time and then dropping down more sharply, an action which brought a cry to her lips. Then she closed her eyes and rode his cock, lost to the steady circling of his thumb, the ram of the erection into her willing flesh, the excitement that took charge as she sped towards orgasm.

‘Rey,’ he said sharply, cutting her concentration.

She ignored him, kept her head down and her legs spread but his thumb stopped moving and she clenched around him in frustration.

‘You’re doing it again. Look at me.’

It was an effort of will to tear herself from the impending climax but she opened her eyes and found him staring at her, concern written into the lines of his forehead. He gave a quick smile and resumed his attack on her swollen clitoris, thrusting fully inside her with a sure, deliberate stroke. She felt her eyes roll but pulled herself together and met his gaze.

‘Better. I want you to look at me when you come.’

It took a few more thrusts, so deep she was sure she couldn’t possibly fit any more of him inside and on the last she watched his face begin to sag, the stern lines on his brow lose focus, his mouth hang open and he was shuddering, spending himself inside her with a groan of effort. The sight pushed her over the edge and she came as he watched, came hard on his cock, came hard on his thumb, came because he was coming too and the connection between them demanded it. She collapsed on his chest, shaking.

‘You are astonishing,’ he murmured.

She hummed against the thud of his heartbeat. ‘I prefer magnificent.’

‘That too.’

She rested on him for a few minutes while he stroked her hair and his breathing returned to normal, then he rolled her off him gently, slid from the bed and retrieved his robe. ‘I need to fetch some clean clothes,’ he said. ‘I’ll be back in a minute.’

‘I’ll run a bath,’ she responded, lazily certain that he wasn’t going to need whatever apparel he wanted to fetch.

‘You are extremely hard to leave,’ he said, and vanished.

It was only when a banging on her door accompanied by shouting from Poe woke her from a bath which had now gone cold, that she realised she might be easier to leave than he’d promised.


	15. The Mole

It was hard to hear what Poe was yelling with her ears underwater so Rey pushed herself out of the bath, yanked a towel from the rack and tucked it around her chest. She made it to the door of her suite just as he started kicking it.

‘Run,’ he yelled, dodging around her without waiting to be asked. ‘We’re being attacked, we have to run.’

She blinked at him stupidly. ‘Attacked? No one brings weapons into a truce situation.’

‘What’s the matter with you?’ Poe was so agitated he hopped from foot to foot. ‘Didn’t you hear the blasters? There’s a fight right outside your door and we need to get out. Now.’ Her state of undress finally seemed to register. ‘Have you just woken up?’

‘I was in the bath,’ she explained. ‘I fell asleep. Who’s attacking us?’

‘No one’s attacking us directly.’ Poe flung a quick glance around the bedroom, spotting her bag and proceeding to push her belongings inside without taking time for the niceties of folding. ‘They’re attacking him. Get dressed, we’re leaving.’

She hurried to the wardrobe to retrieve the white outfit she’d abandoned yesterday, gathering up her boots from the corner, hoping Poe wouldn’t notice the ruined dress or the stains on the bedsheets. She left the door to the bathroom open while she dressed. ‘Who is ‘him’?’

‘Kylo Ren. He’s got a coup on his hands. I was on my way to lunch when Hux barged past me in reception with a couple of other officers, blasters out, chasing something. So I look round and there’s Ren, no lightsaber of course, doing that freezing thing he does with blaster bolts, except that there’s too many of them and he’s only just holding on. Then Pryde appears and starts shooting at Hux and that’s when it gets really messy. Pryde’s got a lot more men and I can hear the tramp of stormtrooper boots coming along the corridor so I commed Rose to get out and she called Chewie with the Falcon. They’ll be here in a minute to pick us up.’

Rey felt wobbly for a second, tried to smooth out the sudden twist of worry in her heart. ‘What happened to Ben?’

‘I didn’t see. But if I’m any judge of character at all, I’d say he’s in trouble. Pryde had this look on his face – like all his dreams had come true, and I’m willing to bet he has just as much interest in taking out Kylo Ren as Hux does. In fact, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Pryde doesn’t just assassinate the Supreme Leader himself and then blame it all on Hux. He could knock out both of them in one go if he plays his cards right. They’ve caught Ren off guard, he’s alone and unarmed and they’re going to take advantage.’

Rey strapped her belt around her waist, both its lightsabers securely attached. ‘He’s not alone.’

Poe gave her an odd look, before running over to the balcony and triggering the doors. ‘He is. There’s no way we’re helping him.’ He waved an arm. ‘Come on Rey, I see them.’

She turned away without a second thought, making for the exit and the firefight beyond. ‘I’m not leaving until I’m sure he’s safe.’

Poe yanked her away from the door, hauling her in the direction of the balcony. ‘He can take care of himself. We can’t. I’m not going to get stuck in the middle of a First Order bloodbath. Leave now, be noble later.’

She wrenched her arm back. ‘You can’t tell me what to do.’

He threw up his hands in exasperation. ‘I’m not telling you what to do. I’m strongly suggesting you get on the Falcon with me. I know you’ve spent a whole day giving Kylo Ren whatever he wanted but he can’t have had that much of an impact on you. He’s a big boy. He doesn’t need you to rescue him.’

‘I’m not leaving until he’s safe,’ she gritted out, in a tone that brooked no compromise.

Poe ran a hand through his hair, turning towards the balcony, his eyes darting across the room and Rey was very aware of what he saw - the unmade bed, of which both sides had clearly been used, the telltale pile of black fabric tossed in a corner, a colour Rey herself would never normally wear.

‘What did you give him?’ he muttered to himself, then shook his head. ‘Never mind that now.’ He pivoted back, shook her shoulders gently. ‘Rey, you are the last Jedi. We need you. This isn’t the time to change sides. If you are still part of the Resistance, I need you on the Falcon right now. Come with me.’

He was right. She knew he was right, she had to leave with her friends, continue the great battle of good against evil, stand up for the light against the darkness. That was her role, her purpose. That was what she had been born for. But standing there in her bedroom, next to the evidence of a night spent playing with the dark side it had never seemed more like a personal choice. Saving Ben was a good enough reason to leave the Resistance, she could feel it in her gut, it was a choice she wouldn’t regret. But Poe was expecting something from her, and the weight of his expectation fell heavily on her shoulders. She wasn’t ready to leave – she’d told Ben as much, and while the need to rescue him burnt within her, the compulsion to do the right thing was stronger.

She dropped her head, shied away from his earnest attention. ‘I’m still part of the Resistance.’

‘Of course you are,’ he said, steering her past the bed with an expression of nausea on his face. ‘Let’s never talk about this again.’

Finn had the ramp of the Falcon down and it was hovering level with the railings as he stood just inside with his arm out. ‘Jump, I’ll catch you.’

Poe gave the breakfast table set for two a suspicious look and then dragged one of the dining chairs away, clambering onto it and launching himself off the balcony with one foot outstretched, reaching for Finn’s hand. Rey simply took a few paces backwards, sprinted forwards and took to the air using the Force to propel her into the belly of the ship without requiring assistance.

‘We have a problem,’ Finn reported the minute they were both on board. ‘Come and see.’

He powered away through the corridors, hurrying in the direction of the communal passenger cabin, calling an explanation over his shoulder as he went.

‘We started receiving a transmission from the mole right after Rose asked for immediate evacuation. I was going to ignore it because we were busy rescuing you, but I thought it might be to do with what was going on with the First Order and when I looked at the message it was a set of co-ordinates. I plugged them in and they were really close by. Really, really close by. So we grabbed Rose and then we stopped by the co-ordinates and then we came for you and well... see for yourself.’

Poe made it into the cabin and stopped so abruptly that Rey nearly collided with his back.

General Hux was sitting at the dejarik table.

‘Now this I gotta hear,’ Poe announced, folding his arms.

‘He’s the mole.’ Finn sounded like even he didn’t believe what he was saying. ‘And before you start arguing he showed me a list of all the transmissions he’d sent us, a list that only the mole would have.’

‘Or a list that only someone who had tortured the mole would have,’ Poe commented, darkly.

‘I would prefer to be referred to as a dissenter.’ Hux’s nasal voice betrayed no sign of fear, despite the fact that he was sitting in the midst of his enemies, speeding away from First Order control as fast as the Falcon could manage.

‘We can call you a traitor, if you like.’ Rey wasn’t quite sure where her antagonism towards this man was coming from, if Hux really was the mole then the Resistance owed much of its current strength to him but she found it hard to rein it in. This wasn’t how she’d imagined her day going.

Hux blinked at her. ‘I am loyal to the First Order.’

‘And yet you’ve been feeding information to the Resistance,’ Poe commented. ‘And not fifteen minutes ago I saw you trying to assassinate Kylo Ren. What are you up to, General?’ He took a seat opposite the other man, keeping one hand near his weapon.

‘Ren murdered Supreme Leader Snoke and then usurped his position. He’s no leader. He cares nothing for the Order, or its goals. For the last year, all we have done is pursue Ren’s mad ideas, chasing Sith legends into the Unknown Regions. He brought in his own personal bodyguard, who don’t recognise anyone else’s authority and sent them out hunting for the source of Snoke’s power – ignoring the fact that he’d already chopped the source of that power in half and thought I wouldn’t notice. And he promoted Captain Pryde, a man so far below the rank of general that Leader Snoke used to have him out supervising trade runs. Neither of them has the aptitude or talent for high office. I am the rightful ruler of the First Order.’

‘And you thought we would help put you on the throne because…?’ asked Poe.

‘Because you have no choice.’ Hux bent forward, a feral gleam in his eye. ‘You were nothing when I found you, floating in space on this ship with no resources, no power. Everything you have built since then you have done with my help. You owe me.’

‘You were part of the negotiations. You know how strong we are. We’re about to wipe the Order out. Exactly what do we owe you?’

‘You owe me my rightful place on the throne.’ Hux’s fist hit the table.

Rey found it hard to believe that he hadn’t completely lost his mind, negotiating for power when he evidently had no leverage left to offer. Poe clearly thought the same thing.

‘I think you might have made a mistake here, buddy. The information you’ve been leaking us – it was all designed to help us knock out your rivals, wasn’t it? You told us where the Emperor was going to be before his coronation so we could try to kill him, and you gave us the location of Pryde’s new flagship because you thought he’d be on it. You arranged for that live broadcast from Kylo Ren’s favourite swamp because you hoped we could stop him getting to wherever he was going. But we failed. We didn’t manage to assassinate either of them, and we got so strong that now we don’t need you any more. You weren’t expecting that, were you? You thought you could use us to get rid of the two men who stood between you and absolute control, and instead we’re going to take control ourselves. We don’t owe you anything.’

Hux was grinning in a disturbing sort of way. ‘And yet you are going to help me anyway.’

‘I’ll help you any way that doesn’t involve putting you on the throne. I’m grateful for the intelligence, really I am, but you must realise that you’ve lost. The First Order is over. We know about the modified Imperial Star Destroyers. Our bombers are halfway to their location – in a few hours they’ll all be floating around in pieces. The minute that happens I’m going to launch an attack and wipe out the rest of the navy, and then I’m going to take down the Order planet by planet. It won’t be quick, and it won’t be clean, but it will be successful.’

Hux chortled to himself, retrieved a pad from his pocket and started tapping on it, while Finn and Poe exchanged bemused glances. Ben was right, Rey thought, the man really was annoying.

The General placed the pad on the table, twirled it around so that they could all see the screen. ‘These Imperial Star Destroyers?’

A live feed flickered into being, with a similar angle to the one that Finn had shown from his probe on Exegol. This time however, it was apparent from the blaze of light and colour across the sky, the sheer number of transports bustling between the giant vessels, the sense of haste and movement across the whole scene, that the ships were no longer in hibernation, but were in the later stages of being mobilised.

Poe shot Rey a horrified look. ‘But he gave the order to stand down.’

‘He did,’ Rey confirmed. ‘Ben gave the order to stand down two days ago. This has to be a hoax.’

Hux gave her another of his odd grins, tapping another few commands that replaced the picture on screen with a few lines of code. ‘Supreme Leader Ren gave the order to stand the fleet down last night. Around dinner time. From your quarters.’

Everyone in the room looked at Rey. Rey looked at the screen. From her quick scan it appeared that Hux was correct. A transmission had been sent from a comms relay associated with her room number at around the time they had returned from the beach last night, when she’d still been battling a concussion and he’d appeared to be ordering food.

She squinted at the data, trying to make sense of it. ‘This is a hoax. It has to be.’

Hux was staring at her now, the expression in his eyes pitying. ‘You are going to help me,’ he repeated, talking only to her. ‘Not them. You.’

Poe pushed out of his seat. ‘If he didn’t give the order when he said he did then that means our bombers are flying into a trap. Those Destroyers will wipe them out as soon as they arrive. Rose – get a message through to the bombing squadron now. Tell them they need to turn around.’

Rose hurried away to the cockpit while Rey dropped onto the frayed padding next to Hux.

‘I don’t understand,’ she muttered, still examining the pad for a mistake.

The memory was etched on her consciousness – she’d stripped and Ben had rejected her advances, saying that he was going to call off the fleet because it was the right thing to do. But he hadn’t done it then, he’d given the order much, much later, too late for it to make any difference. He’d been angry with her that night, more angry than she’d ever seen him – had that been the reason he’d forgotten to follow through?

Poe nudged her. ‘I don’t understand either. That was the night you had that..’ he waved a hand, uncharacteristically delicate. ‘On your neck. I thought the two of you had come to an arrangement.’

‘I thought we had too.’

Hux reached over and patted her hand before she could yank it out of his greasy touch. ‘I came here to see you, because of what happened last night. I’m afraid there is more you need to know.’

‘What happened last night?’ Rey had forgotten that Finn was also in the room, and Connix too, and various other members of the Resistance hierarchy, all standing around ready to bear witness to Hux and his embarrassing revelations.

‘I’ll get to that. But first…’ the General raised his pad, activating its scanning functions and waving it in Rey’s direction. ‘You need to give the order to evacuate the rebel headquarters on Kijimi.’

‘Rey! You didn’t tell them our location again? Are you completely incapable of hiding anything?’ Poe did not sound pleased.

She waved her hands in defence. ‘I didn’t tell him. He already knew.’

Abruptly, Hux ducked under the table and Rey felt a tug on the top of one of her boots before the man reappeared bearing a tiny, translucent, wafer thin dot on the tip of one finger. He placed it on the table top and cracked his fist down on it hard.

‘She didn’t tell him. She’s had a tracker on her since you left Ajan Kloss. If we hadn’t had to participate in those ridiculous peace talks the First Order would have obliterated your base days ago.’

A sick, swooping vertigo blurred Rey’s vision for a second as she stared at the smashed tracker, recalling how she’d found her boots neatly placed by the door the morning she’d woken to find him in her quarters on the jungle planet. He’d admitted to tracking her, but somehow she’d thought he hadn’t meant like this, not using technology to monitor her movements – she’d thought he’d been sensing her through the Force, or had heard rumours of her activities from distant informants. This was something different. This was premeditated, the actions of an enemy, not someone with whom she’d made a lasting connection.

‘Rose,’ Poe yelled. ‘Can you call the main base as well and signal another evacuation? Tell them to move to...’ He stopped suddenly and cast a swift glance in Rey’s direction. ‘Just order them to evacuate and wait for co-ordinates.’

Rey threw him a wounded look.

‘What happened last night?’ asked Finn.

She gave her friend much the same sort of expression but Finn stuck out his chin bullishly. ‘I think we have a right to know. You allowed yourself to be tracked, you’ve given away our location twice. And last night HoloNet was full of the ecological disaster on Dorumaa that mysteriously happened right in the middle of the peace talks. Did you know that all the oceans on the planet froze in the space of about a minute? All of them, all at once. All the marine wildlife is dead – all the turtles, everything. The planet is ruined, they’re going to try cloning to recover some of the fish stocks but the seas are empty and the tourist industry may never be the same again. What can you think of that can freeze a planet, Rey? I think we have a right to know what happened last night.’

She passed a hand over her eyes so she didn’t have to face the accusatory expressions around the room. She was with friends, comrades, allies, but right at that moment she knew she was alone. Only Hux threw her a crumb of comfort, in the form of a reassuring nod, and the fact that she was now receiving validation from her enemies succeeded in making her feel worse.

‘It’s easy to miss a tracker,’ he said, queuing up something else on his pad. ‘Ren has one on him right now and doesn’t know it. That’s how I knew where he was this morning so I could cause a diversion and have you kidnap me.’

‘No one’s going to buy this as a kidnapping,’ Poe demurred. ‘You were trying to kill your boss, I saw you myself. You’re a traitor – I know it, and they know it too.’

‘Quite the contrary. I am loyal to the First Order, as I said. I attacked the so-called Supreme Leader when I realised he had ordered our back up fleet to stand down, and that he had done so in the knowledge that the Resistance were on their way to attack it. I attempted to assassinate him because he is a traitor to the regime, but unfortunately, you came along and kidnapped me instead.’

‘Literally no one is going to believe you.’

‘They will when they see this.’ Hux’s fingernail clicked on his pad.

With lightning speed, Rey put the pieces together and buried her face in her hands. The Resistance had swept the planet for bugs and listening devices before anyone else had arrived, and she knew that the Order didn’t routinely record its leader’s private conversations because he’d told her so. That meant that whatever Hux was so smug about showing, it was footage he’d taken on his own. He definitely hadn’t been lurking in the bedroom, but there had been one occasion last night when Rey and Ben hadn’t been inside.

She heard her own voice on the recording. ‘Wait. Don’t go.’

A deep voice replied: ‘Good night, Rey.’

‘Stay with me. We haven’t finished talking.’

‘This is the crucial part,’ noted Hux. ‘This is what I’ll use to prove that Ren’s a traitor. This is why the First Order will welcome me back once I’ve done what I came here to do.’

On the tape, Ben said, ‘You only want me to stay so you’ll have time to destroy the fleet. Be my guest. I’m not going to stop you. We’ve been through this before.’

‘That’s enough now, isn’t it?’ Rey attempted to limit the damage. ‘We don’t really need to hear the rest.’

‘I think we do,’ said Finn and no one else in the room disagreed.

‘No, stay with me because I want you to,’ Rey begged on the recording and Rey in the room crossed her arms on the table and hid her head.

‘You don’t. You’re not ready. You don’t even know what you’re asking.’

‘I do. You say I’m not alone. Prove it.’

‘I’ve heard enough.’ Poe stepped in. ‘I don’t think we need to embarrass Rey by listening to any more.’

‘Yes, we do,’ Finn was almost at shouting volume and Rey could feel his vehemence from her hiding position. ‘You heard what Ren said, ‘you only want me to stay so you’ll have time to destroy the fleet.’ Rey didn’t want him to stay with her last night, she was trying to buy us time. She was being a good little solider and doing as she was told so you could complete your plan. You put her in this position, Poe. You’re a general, you pushed her into Kylo Ren’s arms so you could destroy his navy. This is your fault. Rose told me what you did – you ordered Rey to go to his room in the middle of the night and ask for a favour. What did you think was going to happen?’

‘I don’t give her orders.’ Anger threaded Poe’s words and he rose from his seat. ‘She’s the last Jedi. I can’t order her to do anything.’

‘I know how this goes,’ Finn’s voice came out twisted. ‘This is what you learnt from Leia isn’t it? From Holdo. As long as you don’t actually order anyone to do anything you can sleep at night. But if they decide on their own, if they decide to sacrifice themselves voluntarily then that’s not your fault, is it? You didn’t give the order. It isn’t down to you. You forced Rey to offer herself to a man she hates for you. For the Resistance. For all of us. And I know how that feels because I nearly sacrificed myself too – I was willing to crash into a cannon for you.’

‘I never ordered you to do that,’ Poe yelled back, furious.

‘That’s exactly my point,’ Finn shouted.

Hux tapped at his pad, and said in a musing tone, ‘You know, I always imagined that the Resistance leadership would hate each other less than the First Order leadership do, but I see now I was mistaken.’

The tape resumed and Rey put her hands over her ears.

‘Are you coming into exile with me?’

‘I can’t just leave.’

‘Then I won’t stay. I don’t want one night, Rey. I want a future.’

‘I think we’ve heard enough of that.’ This was Hux again, making an executive decision. ‘We can all imagine what happened next.’

Rey didn’t want to look up. She knew exactly what the rest of the rebels must be thinking, how disgusted they must be with her now. Some, like Finn, might be sympathetic enough to think that she’d been coerced into bed, but she wasn’t going to be able to let that lie continue for much longer.

But Hux wasn’t finished. ‘The Supreme Leader can be quite persuasive. At least, that’s what I hear from the Knights of Ren. From one of them anyway. And he can also be quite rough, apparently. I expect she was grateful for a night off.’

Rey’s head shot up, her eyes round.

Hux’s expression had morphed from pity into something like sorrow, or as close to it as he could manage. ‘There is more I need to show you. And you are going to need to watch this time, I’m afraid.’

Rey hardly dared to ask. ‘What do I have to see?’

Hux went back to tapping. ‘I need to show you what happened when Kylo Ren met his grandfather.’


	16. Exegol

The recording had been made on a bodycam, but it was no lowly stormtrooper who had taken it this time. The opening shot was of a pair of thin shoulders in a dark uniform and the top of a head running to baldness as they went downstairs. In front of the older, balding man a swirl of black cape caught a flash of light in the gloom.

Hux began a voiceover. ‘After retrieving the device from the creature in the swamp, we followed the co-ordinates on the wayfinder to the planet of Exegol. The Supreme Leader was desperate to find what he had sought for so long, but unsure of his reception, so only three of us went into the hole in the ground.’

The stairs went on for some time, Hux’s camera jiggling as he made the long descent, Pryde beginning to struggle in front of him, Kylo Ren a dim figure striding out in the lead, taking the steps two at a time. Eventually, the entrance broadened out into a wide hall, too wide for the sides to be seen, an underground cavern hewn out of rock. A chasm yawned in front of the staircase, a thin strip of rock the only way to cross. Hux followed the others as they picked their way across the bridge, and when the angle of the shot leaned out into the void it was apparent that the bottom of the pit was far, far out of sight beneath.

On the far side of the bridge Hux paused, waiting, and the Supreme Leader approached on his own. A vast, rock hewn throne thrust from the cave floor, thick pillars branching out on all sides, like a giant spider frozen in the throes of death. The throne was empty, but it was apparent from the sounds filling the darkness that something lurked in the shadows. Hux took a few paces closer, leaving Pryde somewhere behind, tracking Kylo Ren as he approached whatever hid to one side of the dais.

‘Stop.’ The command in the voice was undeniable, the authority undimmed by the passage of years and Hux came to an immediate halt, but after a second or so, his superior officer shook off the order and continued, igniting his lightsaber.

With the added illumination of the red blade shining steady through the repetitive flashes of lightning, the camera picked out a man, his features shadowed, his body barely distinguishable, surrounded as it was by such a welter of medical equipment. The figure was wisp thin, clad all in black and masked by breathing apparatus so thick his face could not be seen.

‘Who are you?’ Although he tried to hide it, Kylo Ren’s voice held an unmistakable tremble.

‘You know who I am.’ The voice through the mask was harsh, grating and not at all friendly.

‘Grandfather?’

There was a very long silence from the figure in the darkness, time during which Hux fidgeted in place and the lightsaber shook in its master’s unsteady hand.

‘Yes, my boy.’

A noise came from the man with the laser sword, half exclamation, half sob, and the weapon in his hand went out. In the sudden darkness he said, ‘I have so many questions, grandfather.’

‘And yet I have only one.’

The Supreme Leader tilted his head, clearly unsure.

‘Why do you not kneel?’ asked the emaciated man in the chair.

‘Kneel? I…why would I kneel? I am Supreme Leader of the First Order, there is no one to whom I kneel.’ A tinge of stubbornness and more than a hint of pride suffused his voice.

‘You, above all others should know that such titles signify nothing. Titles are won and lost and are all the cheaper for it. Darth Vader. Kylo Ren. What matters is who you are.’

‘I am Kylo Ren.’

The figure nodded. ‘Currently. But it was not always so.’

‘I have renounced my birth name.’

‘Renounced, but not forgotten. And that is why you are here, is it not? That is why you have sought me out after all this time. You have not forgotten who you were. You have tried, of course. You murdered your father, neglected your mother, drove your uncle into exile but now that your family is dead they live on in your memory where they cannot be killed. They are always with you. So you have come to me. Seeking counsel. Seeking guidance. Seeking a new master.’

The young Emperor’s head shot up. ‘I have no need of a master. I am the master now.’

There was a bite in the old man’s words. ‘You failed your training. You did not complete the final test. You are an apprentice still.’

‘The final test was… not worthy of the training. It should not have been set. I was tricked, manipulated. The test was not fair.’

The camera picked up a slight noise from Hux, a snigger, quickly concealed behind a cough at the whining tone of these last words.

‘The test was fair. You were asked to kill your enemy. You refused. You disobeyed your master.’

‘Snoke was not fit to be my master – I surpassed him. He was short-sighted. Blind to the possibilities, too full of hate to see what could be achieved. He asked me to kill someone who could be a powerful ally, someone whose abilities should not be wasted by a pointless death.’

The older man chuckled. ‘Snoke had his limitations, I agree, but he was a useful tool. He ruled where I could not.’

There was a short silence before the response came back. ‘Snoke was your apprentice?’

‘Snoke was mine. I created him, gave him power, gave him authority, sent him off to create armies in my stead. I have not been well for some time, stuck in this hole with no way out. I required a puppet, an obedient marionette who could respond to the strings I pulled until the right time came. But you murdered Snoke before I was ready and with his passing I lost any means to contact you, save one.’

‘The visions.’

‘The visions. I called you to come to me the minute I sensed that Snoke was gone but you ignored me. You were too busy playing at being Emperor, never realising that the power behind the throne was all mine.’

The Emperor visibly bristled at that. ‘I rule the First Order. I rule the galaxy. I do not require your help. The power is mine.’

The answer was immediate, the sick man rising from his chair with a burst of renewed energy. ‘I put you where you are today. I put you on the throne and I can take it away again.’

He gestured sharply and there was a rumble from the pit behind, a complaint from the bowels of the earth. The camera lurched to one side as Hux staggered, shaken by a tremor pitching the floor of the cavern. To one side a large screen rose into view, screeching as rusted mechanics hauled it out of the rock. The shot panned out as Hux turned and for a second, all the screen showed was the barren surface of Exegol, the plains dead and empty. Then the rumble from the pit expanded into a roar and with a slow and hesitant motion, a hole appeared amidst the boulder strewn ground on screen. The hole was rectangular, regular in size and shape and expanded at an advancing rate of knots. An audible gasp cut through the cavern’s background noise as the blunt, pointed nose of a dagger shaped ship emerged from the darkness.

Pryde’s voice whispered, ‘An Imperial Star Destroyer.’

‘A loyalist, I see,’ came an amused voice from the shadows as the earth outside gave birth to a ship, and a second began to exit from the same channel. ‘This is my fleet of Sith Destroyers, sent into hiding before you were born, developed and improved in my solitude and now ready to crush whatever resistance stands in my way. Including you, if necessary.’

Ships continued to emerge from the gloom and there was a long silence in the cavern as the Supreme Leader’s attention pivoted between the emerging threat on screen, and the weak and feeble instigator of that threat on the dais.

The camera shifted as Hux stepped forward. ‘Supreme Leader, have you noted the weapons systems with which those vessels have been modified? I would counsel caution.’

‘There are so many of them.’ Pryde’s voice was awed.

Kylo Ren’s gloved hand made a slashing motion and his minions fell silent. ‘How have you achieved this?’ he demanded. ‘Who are you?’

There was a dark and humourless chuckle. ‘Your ally. And your master. Kneel.’

‘I do not kneel. I am no one’s slave.’ A thumb caressed the switch of the red lightsaber.

‘Supreme Leader,’ Hux called out in warning.

‘There is no need, no need.’ The aged figure dissolved into a fit of coughing. ‘I have no need of a slave. I seek only an apprentice. And a successor. The fleet is yours to command as you see fit, on one condition.’

The thumb had not shifted. ‘Which is?’

‘That you bring your potential ally to me.’

The response was slow, suspicious. ‘You want me to bring you Rey?’

‘I wish to meet the woman for whom you murdered your master. She must be something special.’

The lightsaber raised. ‘You wish to kill her. As Snoke did.’

‘I am not as short-sighted as Snoke. I will not harm her. I will turn her to the dark side.’

The younger man hesitated, and his weapon lowered momentarily. ‘I tried that. I offered her power, I offered her the chance to rule at my side. She did not turn.’

‘There are many paths to the dark side. Power is one. Fear is another. If she fears that her precious Resistance will die, she will turn. If she fears the loss of life which will be unleashed on the galaxy by my fleet should she not do exactly as you say, she will turn. If she fears you, if she fears me, then she will join us.’

The dark head dropped. ‘I do not want her fear.’

‘You want her love?’

Hux repressed another snigger, but a backwards glance and a sudden choking noise too close to the microphone as the reprisal took effect cut it off.

The old man continued, with an almost sympathetic note in his voice. ‘Love and fear are indistinguishable in their effects – both are simply a means of control. Love is also a path to the dark side. Bring her to me, and I will give you all that you desire. She will rule at your side. She will warm your bed. And she will be grateful for the opportunity to do so.’

‘Why would you do this for me?’

Medical equipment whined and hissed as the patient spread his hands. ‘We are family.’

He knelt. Kylo Ren knelt and bowed his head and said, in a tone of reverence, ‘Grandfather.’

A swish of a hand, the suggestion of power whistling unseen through the air had Hux’s camera swaying and he gasped in surprise as something appeared on the floor of the chamber. A woman’s unconscious form, dressed in off white robes which were pooled around her slumped body, her hair spilling out of the three buns which held it back.

The Supreme Leader was off his knees and at her side in a couple of strides but when he bent down his hand slid through the image and he looked up angrily. ‘What have you done to her?’

Machinery whirred in the shadows; the old man gestured. ‘There is no permanent damage. You have chosen well - she is a savage beauty indeed. Such power. She runs straight to the darkness. She will be a worthy successor. She will continue my legacy.’ There was a pause and Hux stepped closer to catch the rest of his words. ‘There is already a connection between you, a rare bond of great strength. Such things sometimes exist where the number of Force users falls to a handful, or even to two. Between you, you carry the wasted capability of thousands of other souls never born. You are equal, you balance, you cannot destroy her but together you possess a power greater than either of you can draw on alone. This will be useful.’

There was a dry, scraping noise as the old man licked his lips and continued. ‘She feels physical attraction towards you but I see no trust in her mind. Yet she still believes you can be saved. You must approach her carefully – I can perhaps make her more receptive to your advances but she is strong willed, you must allow her to come to you on her own.’

Kylo’s hand hovered in the air above Rey’s cheek. ‘How do I do that?’

The old man reached out, his palm turned towards the fallen woman. ‘Tell her you wish to be redeemed. Make her believe you have turned back to the light and she will not be able to resist the bait. Snoke was right in that, at least. She is alone – offer her companionship, understanding. Show her love and she will be yours. Then – bring her to me and I will do the rest.’

‘Yes, grandfather.’

The picture froze on Rey’s image, lying on the floor in a cave she had never visited, surrounded by strangers discussing how best to bend her to their will.

Hux resumed his narrative, placing the words carefully into the stunned silence of the passenger cabin.

‘We left not long afterwards. To my knowledge the Supreme Leader followed the plan outlined by his grandfather until yesterday – the transmission he sent to stand down the fleet was the first indication I had that his loyalty might be straying.’

Hux looked directly into Rey’s eyes. ‘I did not agree with this course of action. I did not trust whoever it was we met in that cave. Darth Vader was a legend in the Empire, but his death is shrouded in mystery and I have seen the relic that Ren hides in his shuttle. I find it hard to credit that such a man, if he survived whatever caused that amount of damage, would hide for so many years, concealing so much power. I am loyal to the First Order, and I do not appreciate having it threatened by someone who would turn our own technology against us. I do not relish the idea of an independent Sith fleet, and I do not want it in the hands of an unknown Force user who wishes my Supreme Leader to call him ‘master.’’

He reached out and took her hand and Rey didn’t pull away. ‘You must help me. This is why I have come. You are being deceived. Ren has been more desperate than ever to find the identity of the mole over the last few weeks because he is terrified that any whisper of his plan might get back to you. You are the only one who can stop him.’

He squeezed her fingers. ‘You must kill Kylo Ren.’


	17. Kef Bir

Rey didn’t bother with an answer. She ripped her hand out of Hux’s grasp and ran flat out in the direction of the nearest fresher, barely making it before her stomach contents expelled themselves at speed, leaving her heaving only bile. She wiped her mouth on the back of her hand, bowing under the pressure of her thoughts until the cool metal grille of the floor cushioned her cheek. It was a visceral kind of sadness. Where excitement had once stirred in her belly, now there was nothing but nausea; betrayal and grief churned her guts. Tears slipped unnoticed down her cheeks to pool in glinting splashes.

Nothing she had been told was true. The trust she had been so wary of giving was smashed underfoot. Ben had lied to her, looked her in the face and lied over and over again. He had never wanted a second chance, never wanted to repent and come back to the light, his only desire had been a selfish one – to have her at his side at all costs. The part that made her really sick was knowing that had he not proven to be unfaithful, had he not been revealed as the lying snake he was, she would probably have ended up at his side anyway. She had slept with him, she was more than halfway to loving him and she’d believed he loved her back. Now she was certain that he didn’t.

What Ben felt wasn’t love – this was obsession. This was an emotion so selfish it didn’t care what she wanted, it didn’t care that some monster in the darkness had pried around in her mind to read her thoughts. Maybe he had done more than that. Kylo’s new master had said he might be able to make Rey ‘more receptive’, whatever that meant.

She pushed herself up on one elbow. What had been done to her mind? How far had this malign influence spread? Was it possible that the reason she had initiated that very first kiss between them on his flagship, the reason she had rushed into taking her clothes off in an attempt to seduce him was that Darth Vader had poked around in her thoughts to make her ‘more receptive’? Was that the reason she had gone to bed with his grandson in the first place – why she had run out into a hotel corridor and begged him to stay with her?

Her cheeks flamed with the memory and she sat up straight against the wall. She was a victim here. She had been betrayed, let down at every turn by someone she had trusted, someone she had allowed into her heart and into her body, someone who had never deserved anything she’d given him. Now she saw him for who he really was, a weak, pathetic man, so desperate for affection he would prostrate himself at the feet of a monster to get what he wanted. Kylo Ren was vulnerable to a specific type of persuasion, but Rey wasn’t the only one to have seen this – his dark side puppeteers were well aware of his vulnerabilities too.

She lifted her chin. He would never have the chance to hurt her like this again. Anything she had felt for him was a lie, manufactured by the dark side, put in her head to manipulate her and she locked it up, sank the grief in a place so deep it would never surface. No one would ever have the chance to hurt her like this again. She was used to be being alone and she needed no one.

She scrambled to her feet. The sickness inside her curdled, calcified, became a hard lump of anger in her guts. She couldn’t hate him – he was too pitiful to deserve her hatred and that would only lead to a place too dark for her to go. But she could seek retribution. She could ensure he made amends for his mistakes. Kylo Ren would pay for what he had done, and he would pay in blood and in pain. She might not be able to kill him, but she could certainly make him hurt, even worse than he had hurt her.

She keyed the door of the fresher, strode out into the corridor full of a new resolution. The sound of raised voices drifting from the passenger cabin halted her in her tracks.

‘How do you know that? Have you asked her about contraception? That’s not the sort of conversation I’d dare have with a Jedi.’

‘She slept with him. Even if she isn’t pregnant she’s already compromised. She can’t be trusted.’ Rey recognised Rose’s voice.

‘You can’t seriously be suggesting we get rid of our most effective weapon?’ Poe sounded incredulous.

‘She’s not a weapon. She’s my friend, and she isn’t going anywhere.’ Finn’s loyalty could always be counted on.

‘I’m not suggesting getting rid of anyone. All I’m saying is that maybe she should take a break until we can sort all of this out. We’re in a mess. There’s a fleet in the Unknown Regions too well equipped for us to destroy, our enemy knows the location of all of our major bases and our headquarters and we’ve got a couple of hours to work out how to stop our armada and all our allies from being totally obliterated.’ Perhaps Rose was just being realistic – she sounded perfectly reasonable.

‘That’s exactly why we need Rey. We can’t win without her.’ Rey could imagine the stubborn set of Finn’s jaw.

‘I don’t think we can win with her. Didn’t you watch that recording? She’s had Darth Vader in her head – who knows what he put there? That might be why she keeps giving away our location. That might be why she nearly crashed that Dreadnaught and froze the oceans on Dorumaa. That might be why she ran off and slept with Ren. Maybe she’s been brainwashed onto the dark side and she doesn’t even know it. I’m not blaming her, I just don’t think we can trust her.’

Poe said, ‘She nearly didn’t come with me when we left Dorumaa. She wanted to go back and save him. I almost had to drag her onto the ship. I didn’t push her into bed with him Finn, honestly I didn’t. That was her decision, and she doesn’t seem to regret it.’

‘She’s always been a bit… different,’ Kaydel spoke up suddenly. ‘She scares me sometimes.’

‘That’s just because she’s so powerful. As long as she keeps it under control there’s no need to be scared. She’s never threatened any of us, has she?’ Finn was trying to be loyal, but Rey didn’t entirely care for his desire to assure people she thought of as friends that she wasn’t a threat.

‘I don’t think she’s under control, Finn.’ Rose sounded resigned. ‘You saw what happened on Pasaana. It was obvious she was calling Ren and she didn’t even know she was doing it. She hasn’t been right since Leia died. I think we’re putting her under too much pressure. I think she should go away for a while until she recovers. It might be better for her.’

‘It might be better for everyone,’ Poe too sounded like he was coming to a decision. ‘We’re going to be fighting the First Order soon, I need to know I can count on everyone without question. If Rey needs time to get her head straight then we should give her all the time she needs. She’s our friend, we owe her that.’

There was a long silence, broken by Finn. ‘Where do you suggest she goes?’

Rey’s shoulders slumped briefly, until she caught sight of Hux lurking around the bend of the corridor, eyeing her with interest. He padded over on silent feet.

‘Don’t blame them,’ he whispered. ‘This isn’t their fault.’ He tapped at his pad for a minute. ‘Kylo Ren is on Kef Bir.’

Rey nodded to herself. The location didn’t matter, should she want to she could find him wherever he was in the galaxy, what mattered was what she was going to do when she saw him again. She took a deep breath and checked the position of the two lightsabers on her belt, the only friends she needed. Then she strode into the cabin, Hux close on her heels.

‘I’m going away,’ she announced, before the guilt on their faces could fully recede. ‘It’s better for everyone. I’ll go back to Ahch-To - maybe I can get in touch with Master Luke. I have some things to think about.’

Finn opened his mouth as if to lodge a protest and then closed it again. Rey felt tears prickle her eyes. ‘How long will you be gone?’ he asked.

She shrugged. ‘As long as it takes. Drop me off at the nearest base and I’ll borrow a ship.’

‘I’m going with her,’ Hux made it sound like no one else had any say in the matter.

‘You’re going nowhere. We need every piece of information on the First Order we can get, so right now, you’re my new best friend.’

Hux took a few steps closer to Poe and turned over the collar of his uniform, pointing out something that only the other General could see. ‘The Order already know where I am. The longer I stay with you, the more danger you’re in. I suggest you let me out as soon as possible.’

Poe swore under his breath. ‘Damn trackers. Rose, find us a good place to leave Rey. General Hugs, let me introduce you to the escape pods. You’ll be getting to know one of them quite well.’ He marched the other man away down the corridor.

Rey followed, returning to the room she used without meeting anyone’s gaze, slung her belongings into a bag and straightened her bunk. No one knocked on the door to say goodbye. No one came to tell her how sorry they were she was leaving, or to try to talk her out of it. Words skulked through her memory, and although she chased them away, they kept coming back. _Eventually they will turn on you, they will abandon you, they will cast you out. _He had warned her, the traitor she had trusted, and his doleful voice echoed in her head_. You think you’re part of something now but you don’t really fit in. You’ll always be alone._ She didn’t want him to be right, and she’d thought when he’d said these things to her only yesterday, that she was invincible – her life was going to be so different from the way his had gone that she could only feel pity for him. A day later she was packing and it was all his fault.

She had no intention of running back to the Jedi temple, no intention of raising Luke’s ghost and admitting that she’d spread her legs for his nephew and lived to regret it. This was a problem she’d have to solve herself.

The Falcon landed on an outpost whose name she didn’t know and didn’t care enough to find out. There was a quick embrace from the Resistance hierarchy, none of whom could properly meet her gaze, some muttered farewells and half hearted promises to check in in a few days and then she hopped in a surplus transport and set a course for Kef Bir. She was numb. She ate, she drank, she slept, but she felt nothing, tasted nothing, dreamt of nothing. She went through the motions of her life mechanically, because she had no energy left for anything else. It took all the resolve she had just to maintain the walls she’d put in place. She didn’t want to think. She didn’t want to feel. She wanted only to seek justice, to watch him make amends for his crimes and then forget the whole sorry episode.

Sensors in her ship picked up the signature of First Order technology as she approached the moons of Endor, although the signal was nearly lost in the confused blur of a pattern which was similar to that of the ruling military but subtly different. The closer she got the clearer the distinction became, a visual scan indicating the presence of the Supreme Leader’s command shuttle perched on wreckage far out in the middle of an ocean, wreckage so vast it reduced the ship to an insignificant speck. There was only one life form present, which would make this task less complicated. Rey had no wish to land her craft next to his, and no desire to pilot it over the waves after she’d completed her mission so she searched for the nearest landmass to the wreck and parked there instead.

She stood behind the pilot’s chair for a second before she departed, tightened the arrangement of her hair, loosened the sabers on her belt, pulled up her boots and checked her reflection. Although pale, her face betrayed no sign of weakness, and the determination in her eyes did not falter as she peeled off a leaf of memory and concentrated on Kylo Ren. This memory was as fresh as yesterday morning, from the moment she’d collapsed panting on his chest, his heartbeat thundering in her ear, the smell of his sweat on her skin, the hot warmth of his orgasm seeping between her legs.

She focused and the blur of travel through the Force clouded her eyes for a brief moment.

She ignored the black cloaked back immediately in front of her, scanned the room for entrances and exits, tactical advantages and threats. She was in front of a large round window, its supports broken or missing; the entire floor beneath it sloped sharply downwards. The remains of a chair base were visible to her left hand, the wiring exposed under the seat, one of a slew of bits of equipment thrown in an untidy pile around the edges of the room.

Ben turned, and she reminded herself sternly that he was not Ben, she had never known Ben, this person was an enemy to her, and a dangerous enemy at that. He didn’t look much like an enemy though, because his head jerked up the minute she materialised and when he turned, his face collapsed into relief, his arms opening as he approached with hurried steps.

‘Where have you been? Why did you leave? I went back to your room and you’d gone and I…’

She ignited her lightsaber, the blue light directly under his chin and he pulled up short, frowning. ‘Rey? Are you alright?’

‘I spoke to Hux.’ She made sure her voice was level, unemotional. ‘He was the mole.’

He became very still, very quickly, his dark eyes fastening on her face.

‘He showed me a recording of what happened when you met your grandfather.’

The blue light cast his features into unfamiliar relief, the mouth she’d kissed forming an ugly line, his expression that of a stranger. He dropped his hands, but didn’t draw his own blade, swaying fractionally closer to the death she had pushed against his throat instead.

‘You’re here to kill me.’ He didn’t sound concerned. ‘You can’t, and I’m not going to fight you. We should discuss this like rational adults.’

He didn’t seem to realise the danger he was in this time, how swift the justice he was facing. He knew she couldn’t kill him outright, and he also knew that any pain she caused him would reflect straight back on her. But he’d underestimated the extent to which she cared about the consequences, the extent to which the threat of physical pain could influence her to do anything, when the hurt he’d already caused was so extreme. Nothing that happened now could possibly be worse than what he’d already done. And besides, she always had other options.

She closed in, pressing her advantage, the hum of certain death filling her ears. She felt the temptation build, a voice somewhere inside her urging her on. If the Force bond was as rare as he’d said, how could anyone possibly know what would happen if one partner tried to murder the other – how could anyone be sure? In just one strike she could decapitate him and there would be no pain, relatively little mess, just a few short seconds and the whole thing would be over and she could go back to her old life and forget he’d ever happened. Everyone she knew wanted him dead, she’d be doing the galaxy a service. She might even get a medal.

The bulk of his chest filled her vision. Up close, he smelled of oil and rust, the sharp tang of old metal filling her nostrils from whatever he’d been handling in the wreckage. His hair fell into twisted patterns, framing the flat planes of his cheeks, the scattering of freckles across the pale skin familiar. She bared her teeth, the weapon so close to his neck that if he swallowed he’d do the job for her, but he didn’t move, didn’t speak. He looked at her with eyes that held no fear, only remorse and in the corner of her vision she was aware of his arm raising, slowly and carefully, unthreateningly, until a fingertip pressed to the back of her hand.

The bond wrapped her in its comforting embrace, bringing with it a power and a certainty that both supported and soothed. This wasn’t a stranger she faced, but someone who knew her inside and out, someone who would stand by her no matter what, someone with whom she shared tremendous power. There was no need for argument between them, together they had a connection that no one else would ever know. She couldn’t stand against it, couldn’t retain her focus in the face of the link between them, however much she might want to try for retribution and without a conscious decision her posture sagged and her arm fell to her side.

He released a long held breath and stepped back as she replaced her lightsaber on her belt and she could tell from the way his shoulders relaxed that he thought the threat had been averted. But the Force bond wasn’t the only power she possessed. It wasn’t her only option. There was another way.

She unclipped the Sith blade from her belt.


	18. Dark sides

He flung out a hand, jumped backwards immediately, stung into a response. ‘Don’t,’ he yelped, his other hand flying to his hip to retrieve his own blade.

She flipped the handle open smoothly, feeling the call of the dark side, leashed but powerful under her hands. She raised the weapon into an opening stance, her finger resting on the toggle that would switch it on.

‘Don’t,’ he repeated. ‘I can explain.’

She span the hilt, testing its range. ‘I’m not interested.’

‘You must be,’ he countered. ‘Or I’d already be dead.’

‘The only reason you aren’t dead is because I keep giving you second chances. You keep making mistakes and I keep letting you off. This – ‘ she waved the handle at him, ‘will make sure I don’t do it again.’ This time, he was going to pay for his crimes.

He straightened, took a deep breath. ‘I love you,’ he said.

Anger cracked the dam she’d put up around her emotions, anger, burning white hot in her guts, bright and pure. These were the words she’d heard in the dark, this was the confession he hadn’t meant for her ears, this was why she’d woken in the morning after spending the night with him with no regrets, no remorse – because he’d said this to himself, and she knew it was only a matter of time before he said it to her. He stood facing her and his black eyes were enormous, full of the emotions swelling his heart and his mouth trembled as if he wasn’t sure quite what he’d just said but was determined to press on anyway. The rage she felt was beyond anything she’d ever experienced, and in that moment, for that fraction of time, she knew what it felt like to hate. 

She switched on the Sith blade. The man in front of her took an involuntarily step backwards, his eyes widening in shock.

‘Fight it, Rey,’ he blurted, jumping clumsily away from her first stroke. ‘You don’t want to do this.’

She simply grinned at him, the power luscious in her veins, and scrutinised his movements carefully for an opening.

He dropped into a defensive crouch, igniting his weapon and the words came pouring out of his mouth, although she had no wish to say anything in return. ‘I love you. You know that. And you love me.’

She went for him in a whirl of dancing blades, chunking the air into blocks of red.

His footwork was excellent and he manoeuvred easily out of her way, returning to circle her carefully, his mouth continuing to spout nonsense.

‘I never imagined you would, not once. I offered you everything I had and you turned me down. I never thought that you’d see me as any more than a monster and I couldn’t live with that. I tried, I spent a whole year trying, but when you got in touch after my mother died and I saw you again I realised I couldn’t carry on repressing it. I tracked down my grandfather because there had to be a reason he was sending me visions of you. Turning you to the dark side was the only way I could imagine we’d ever be together. I was grieving and angry and I wasn’t thinking straight so I went along with what he suggested at first but the more I saw you the harder it became.’

She tested his guard with a few flicks of her weapon, and he parried without seeming effort. She would have to attempt something more unexpected if she was to succeed.

‘Everything changed when we spent the day together. When you were fighting the Knights you were so good, I was proud of you. I was proud that they thought you were mine and I wanted it to be true so badly I would have done anything. But you said you were going to take my place and I realised I didn’t want you to do that. I didn’t want you ending up like me. And then you held the saberstaff you’ve got now and I saw who you’d become if you turned to the darkness and I knew I couldn’t let that happen. I always thought I wanted you like that – like you are now – but I don’t. This isn’t you. This isn’t the person who challenges me and teases me and lets me hold her when I want to. I hate who you’ve become.’

She swung the staff at him, a succession of short, sharp strikes designed to put him on edge and when he raised his saber to block the next blow in the sequence she dropped, pivoted smoothly and attempted to amputate his legs. He jumped, avoiding the shot without breaking a sweat and she frowned, pulling back and continuing to walk the circle.

‘You said the dark side would make me love you and I saw then how stupid I’d been, how stupid I was being. I was trying to force you to love me – I had a whole stupid plan in which I’d drag you off to meet my grandfather and you’d suddenly be convinced into joining me, or terrified into joining me. It was ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. I realised as we sat on that beach that I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to be that sort of person. I didn’t want to force you into anything. I didn’t want to make you into someone you’re not just to suit me. I sat there and held you and I decided not to do any of it, no matter what the consequences were.’

She attempted a rush, a high jab to the shoulder coupled with a blast from her free hand to send him off balance, staggering back while she cut away his weapon but he anticipated the move and simply dodged. She fell back to the floor, cursing under her breath.

‘We went back to your room and I sent the command to stand the fleet down, knowing that my grandfather would find out what I’d done and realise I’d betrayed him. The First Order would know I’d betrayed them, too. That was the turning point, that was when I decided to change. You showed me the way. You said that if we were together, the dark side couldn’t tell us what to do. No one would expect me to kneel, no one would make me crawl. I could just leave everything behind and as long as I had you, it would all be alright.’

She was getting tired of the flapping of his mouth. For the third time she engaged him, using the longer reach of her staff to get inside his defences, battering at him with all the speed and skill she could muster. He didn’t seem phased. He didn’t let her in. She was losing this fight – nothing she did appeared to make a dent on his composure and he would not stop talking.

‘But you had to come to me. It had to be your choice. You had to want me as much as I wanted you or it wouldn’t be real. So I walked away from your room, and I would have left altogether if you hadn’t called me back. We wouldn’t be here now if you hadn’t felt something deep down, something that you didn’t want to let go. It’s still in there, Rey. You can fight this. This isn’t who you are. You love me. You just need to remember that.’

The dark side in Rey was thirsting for blood. It was impatient with this lack of action, with the tedious conversation, with the thrust and parry, lunge and block. The dark side didn’t want to hurt, it wanted to kill, to slash and maim and leave this enemy mortally damaged – there must be a way around the restrictions of the connection between them, a way to bypass the fact that neither one could kill the other. The dark side cared nothing for pain, pain made it stronger. It sought a way through, a way to make him drop his guard, a way to make him vulnerable and it found one. Rey grinned to herself, took a tighter hold on her saber in preparation for the final blow.

She said, ‘I’m pregnant.’

The lightsaber dropped from his nerveless fingers and she whirled and stabbed him through the stomach with the end of her blade. For a second the pain in her guts was so acute it forced her to her knees, so sharp she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, as all the agony her enemy was experiencing was routed directly into her body through their link. Then the darkness rushed in and she recognised it for what it was, not a side at all, not an allegiance but an integral part of herself, one that swallowed the pain and reforged it as a weapon. She felt it locking around her, bolstering her defences, sealing her resolve and any shred of compassion she might have felt towards the man slumped at her feet was lost in the roar of hatred as she celebrated victory. Then she broke the bond and left him in the wreckage.

She felt a strange reluctance to turn the weapon off when she snapped back into being in the cabin of her transport a few seconds later. It had become a soothing presence in her hand and she found it hard to remember a time without it. The darkness spoke in her head and it blotted out all other concerns, with the certainty that she knew what she was doing, that she should follow orders and everything would be alright.

But it was going to be impossible to pilot the ship with a lightsaber in one hand so reluctantly she disarmed the blade but kept the staff open, propping it along the top of the flight console where she could reach out and touch it any time she felt the need. Without the red surety of the double ended beams her head felt fuzzy, less focused. She couldn’t quite remember what she’d just been doing but the lightsaber was right there in front of her so it was safe to assume she’d been in a fight, or at least preparing for one. She didn’t appear to be out of breath though, and there was no blood on her clothes, no sign of injury so whatever fight she’d been in she’d clearly won.

Her hands rested on the controls and she shook her head to clear it. Where was she supposed to be? There was a gap in her mind where whatever mission she was on should be, but the memory slipped out of her grasp. Every time she’d used the saberstaff before, Ben had been with her and without him to ask she had no way of knowing what had happened. He was not Ben, she reminded herself sternly, she did not know Ben. She remembered what had happened before she landed though, she’d been searching for the Supreme Leader, keen to find him and make him face her summary justice, make him atone for his lies.

Her fingers sped over the controls as she ran the scan. There was a First Order ship, the command shuttle in fact, on the smashed remains of an older structure somewhere out in the water but there were no life signs within a reasonable distance, which suggested that he had landed and then gone somewhere else, presumably through the Force. She didn’t remember visiting the shuttle before so she plotted a course to land beside it, setting the craft down delicately on top of the metal platform in the middle of the waves.

The white hull gleamed in the ocean spray, rivulets of salt water running off its sides. The ramp was down but the ship itself was obviously empty, the engines switched off and already cold; it had stood there for some time. She crept up the ramp cautiously, just in case there was something hiding that she’d missed but nothing jumped out at her, nothing stopped her sneaking in and she didn’t need to use either of the weapons on her belt. Step by step she made her way past the scarred walls, the ruined consoles until she reached the drawer in which he kept his treasures – two remained, the wayfinder and the helmet. She brushed her fingers lightly over the top of the latter, wondering whether or not to trigger it again, wondering what choice she should make.

Two courses of action suggested themselves. She could wait for Ren to come back from wherever it was he’d gone, or she could take the opportunity offered by his abandoned shuttle and its convenient map and go in search of the ghost who had poisoned her mind, the man in the shadows of Exegol. She took a moment to consider, and then hooked the wayfinder into the console, drawing the navigational input directly from its star charts. She would have far more chance of landing on a planet surrounded by Star Destroyers in the command shuttle than she’d have in a Resistance transport. This might be the only opportunity she’d get to launch an attack with the element of surprise.

As Kef Bir receded into a distant speck, she found herself reaching for the Sith saber with no very clear reason as to why. She wasn’t under threat, no one was going to attack her in this disguise but she felt uneasy, off balance; her mind no longer felt like it was entirely her own. A nagging suspicion in the back of her head told her something was wrong, but a blanket had been drawn across her emotions and it was hard to poke through. She had arrived on the moon with her guard up, choosing to feel nothing but a justifiable desire for retribution, but even that feeling had been muffled somehow. She rested the saberstaff in her lap, drawing from it some measure of comfort. This was the right choice, she felt, playing with the curve of its handle, the smooth sweep of the opening mechanism, she should go to Exegol, she should confront the dark side. This was her destiny.

The journey was still a lengthy one, despite the speed of the ship and its many comforts. With the controls on autopilot she drifted from panel to panel, console to console, seat to seat, unable to settle, searching for something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. This was the chair she’d sat on to watch the holocron that first time. This was the mirror in which she’d seen her reflection after donning the black dress he’d enjoyed so much. This was not her ship, but it was scattered with her memories, older memories which mocked her with the loss of their newer counterparts. The sense that something was wrong expanded, spread through her body until every part of her was restless.

The landing sequence finally indicated that it was ready to begin and she discovered that a stable bubble of breathable atmosphere existed beneath the overhanging slab which protected the entrance to Vader’s underground lair. She exited the craft cautiously, her feet stirring up dust on the exposed plain, the ground rocky and uneven beneath her feet. The blue glow of her lightsaber did little to cut the darkness, or illuminate much of the path down the steep staircase she’d seen on Hux’s recording. There was only one way to go so she took the path carefully, one hand braced on the rock wall to her left hand, eyes scanning for threats. Arriving at the bottom of the stairs she realised Hux hadn’t filmed the various catacombs and chambers which ringed the central throne room as he’d never turned around. With the bridge across the pit in front of her Rey found a warren of openings at her back, dimly lit cloning pods standing prominently in some, medical apparatus she didn’t recognise in others. From everywhere came a soft murmuring which the recording had totally missed; it sounded as if the very cave walls were alive, whispering to themselves in the darkness.

Rey followed the path that Hux had taken, crossing the chasm with tentative paces, lightsaber extended. As she passed through the gloom a series of statues appeared on the other side, six life size figures standing silent and unmoving, the dim light glinting off their metal bodies. It was only when she reached the other side and stepped back onto solid ground that she realised the figures weren’t statues at all, but men. At least five men, she thought with a sour twist of her mouth, and one woman. A few paces more and she stood in the centre of the semi circle they had formed around her, but rather than preparing for combat as she was expecting, instead the Knights of Ren, moving as a single entity, dropped to their knees. It was a homage, a tribute and Rey’s heart fluttered in her chest as she realised what it meant.

Their loyalty was given to only one leader, and the only way to become that leader was to kill the previous holder of the title. That meant that Kylo Ren was dead, and Rey herself now commanded in his place. She had killed Ben. That was what she couldn’t remember, that was what had felt so wrong. Her resolve faltered for a second. She could remember nothing about the circumstances of his death, what they might have been doing at the time, what he might have said. Without thinking, her hand fell to the Sith blade, yanking it off her belt. This weapon was the only thing that could put such holes in her head and she felt a flash of anger towards it – she had wanted to hurt Ben as he had hurt her, but she had never considered killing him, it should have been impossible.

The realisation that he was dead dropped the centre from her world, he had been the counterpoint to her life for so long now she wasn’t sure what to do without him. Although he had betrayed her in the worst way possible, let her down after convincing her to trust him, whether she liked it or not, he had always been her other half, the darkness to her light and the fact that that balance was now missing left her unsteady. She wasn’t sure who she was if she didn’t define herself against him.

She cocked her arm, preparing to throw the offending saber into the pit, but a noise behind her halted her in her tracks.

‘At last,’ came a voice that she recognised from Hux’s bodycam recording. ‘My daughter has come home.’

She lowered her arm, flipped open the case so that she was now carrying a weapon in each hand and sought the speaker. The Knights of Ren moved into a protective position to flank her and in a reverse that made her feel instantly guilty, she was glad both of their presence, and their single minded devotion to their leader. They would not fall under the pall of whoever waited in the darkness.

‘I am daughter of no one,’ she corrected, grateful for the first time that this was the case.

The shadows seemed to thicken in front of her and she could see the difficulty that the previous visitors to this cave had had. With the impenetrable blackness shot through with blinding lightning at regular intervals, her eyes found it nearly impossible to adjust to the darkness. She simply could not see the face of the man in the shadows and every time she tried a sudden shot of light would send echoes of itself across her vision for a few moments, effectively preventing her from focusing.

‘And you are alone. This is… unexpected.’ The disappointment in the old man’s words was apparent.

‘Kylo Ren is dead. I killed him myself.’

‘Impossible.’ The word snapped out of the shadows. ‘Your bond is unbreakable. A dyad in the Force cannot be sundered by either party on a whim – you cannot kill him, just as he cannot kill you. You are bound together, in both life and death.’

She gestured behind her, moving forward so that she was at the bottom of the raised dais, the empty throne to her left hand, addressing whatever it was that spoke from the shadows. ‘The Knights of Ren would beg to disagree.’

A snort of derision split the silence. ‘They are limited individuals with a limited view. Death is not always permanent, as I am living proof.’

She took another few steps forward, liking the turn of the conversation. ‘How did you survive death, Lord Vader?’

‘The dark side is more powerful than the light, as you already know. You bear a weapon that I have not seen for many years, a weapon which makes you stronger than that puny blade you cling to so desperately. Show it to me.’

The blue saber was flicked out of her hand faster than she could react and went skittering across the floor. Tension thickened the air. There was a rustle as the masked figure sat forward and the whispering in the cavern seemed to get louder. Rey held out the Sith saber, but she did not dare switch it on. Becoming the person who had murdered Ben Solo here, in the midst of the darkness was a risk she didn’t want to take – she had the sense that if she pressed the switch, that was the last thing she would ever remember doing.

‘I see the fear in your mind. You do not embrace the dark side as you should.’

Rey was stung into defiance. ‘I have embraced the dark side quite a lot recently,’ she snapped. ‘At your suggestion.’

The man in the chair considered that for a while, and she wondered how much of her mind he was able to see. ‘You have, my child. I see that you have. This saber has shown you who you truly are – you struck down your lover in a fit of hatred, ran him through in anger and left him to die slowly. That was a death the dyad could not prevent, a loophole you saw and exploited. This means my plans must change. I had thought to bring you both here together, to suck the life from your bond and use it to power my restoration but I see now that is unnecessary. You shall be my successor, a replacement for Snoke, more powerful than he ever was. Your path to the dark side is nearly complete. Submit to it again, and you will truly be mine.’

She pushed away the sudden nausea in her guts, fixating on the one part of that speech she’d really understood. ‘This saber doesn’t show me who I am. It makes me become something I’m not. I’ve only ever used it to understand how to fight the darkness, not turn to it.’

There was a chuckle. ‘This weapon speaks to me, as it does to you. It spoke to you on Pasaana, although you did not recognise its call. No collection of crystal and wiring can make a person become something they are not, the inanimate metal of this saber does not change your essential character – the power of it simply reveals what is already there.’ He paused to let that sink in. ‘Darkness is in your nature. You have already killed the one you love. You are a fitting successor indeed.’

Rey refused to listen to any more of this poison with its slow drip, drip of truth into her ear. ‘I didn’t love him,’ she muttered, casting about for anything with which to refute the suggestion laid at her door. ‘And he didn’t love me. He lied to me. You told him to. You told him to pretend to love me and that was why I hit him, it was justice, not hatred.’

The lascivious exhalation that followed these words crawled down her spine and made her feel dirty. ‘I saw his mind. His feelings were not a pretence. You would not have taken the bait if you had not felt the truth of his words.’ He sat back abruptly. ‘But that is irrelevant. He fell to the light, but the mission I gave him has been achieved – you are here, my savage beauty, and you have walked the path to the dark side on your own.’ The machinery surrounding him whirred as he advanced. ‘Now take your rightful place at my side.’

There was a groaning noise from the stone on which she stood, and a shaking thrummed through the base of the throne as the giant legs which backed it juddered, and then clanked into life. As she watched the colossal structure came awake, stirring itself into slow and painful action and a hole opened in the base, extruding another piece of stone, upon which rested a twisted, deformed object which might have once have been a chair. The shadows parted, revealing the bent shape of an elderly man and the spider-legged throne reached out, manoeuvred the shape of its master onto the broad seat in the midst of the tangle of appendages.

Once settled, the hooded figure gestured at the vacant seat to his right hand. ‘Come,’ he said.

Rey wasn’t listening. ‘He fell to the light?’

‘He need concern you no longer. You struck him down in cold blood, and earned your place at my side. Come, my daughter.’

‘Your daughter is dead,’ she answered with a bite of anger. ‘I didn’t strike him down, that saber struck him, not me.’

‘You held the blade. The dark side runs in you far more strongly than it ever ran in him. He fought the light but you have never fought the darkness.’ The man on the throne appeared to be swelling, puffing up with renewed strength, his volume increasing. ‘He could never shake the attachment he had for his family, and he thought that in you, he had found a new home. How mistaken he was. You killed him for that mistake.’

‘I didn’t kill him,’ Rey gritted out. ‘I couldn’t.’

A sigh cut through the shadows and for the second time in her life Rey felt a fierce push on her chest, a punch in the ribs over her heart, the physical manifestation of a remote dark side attack. ‘Let us see….’

She did see. The amnesia holding back her memories of the three times she had held the Sith saber broke and she saw herself from an external point of view, gripping the weapon in her hand. She watched as this new Rey, this woman with the sharp cheekbones and dangerous eyes chased Ben from the command shuttle and had him cowering on the floor, as he slavered with admiration. She watched as he fought her hand to hand on the beach, saw her pinned down beneath him and cringed as she wrapped her legs over his thighs and offered him the gratification he was craving. She saw the dawning horror on his face, the disgust with which he regarded her, the guilt that drove him to levitate a rock and try to smash the dark side out of her head.

The third time was the worst. She heard the heartfelt apology he’d tried to make, understood the explanation she hadn’t listed to, watched as the dark side consumed her, controlled her, turned her into its slave. He dropped his weapon, tears standing unshed in his eyes and she... she stabbed him through the stomach in what was clearly a mortal blow. She dropped to her knees with the pain and he was still reaching out for her, clutching at his wound but crawling over the floor in an attempt to reach her, to save her from herself. She left him to die. Only then did the fact of his death become real, only then did she feel what it was she had lost.

‘You are my daughter. As everything of the dark side is mine. As Vader was mine, as Snoke was mine, as Kylo Ren was mine. The dark side bows to my will and I am its embodiment. Now take your rightful place and rule the galaxy at my side.’

Rey’s head dropped. She wasn’t the person she’d thought she was, and that wasn’t because of her bloodline or her ancestry – life wasn’t that simple. She’d murdered Ben, and not because she had a dark side grandfather lurking in her past, that was his excuse. She’d run a lightsaber through his guts because that was simply who she was, that was what she was capable of, all on her own. She’d been hurt and angry and she’d lashed out; knowing that the connection between them would prevent her from dealing an immediately fatal blow, she’d left him gravely injured and then flown away in his shuttle, preventing him from getting help. Ben was dead because of her. He’d tried to apologise and she’d ignored him, he’d tried to save her and she’d repaid him with blood and pain. She had struck down an unarmed man in anger and in hatred, in contravention of everything she’d ever been taught, disregarding all the tenets of the Jedi, every code of conduct the Resistance had ever held dear because underneath, that was who she was. Ben was dead because of her. The Knights knew it, and now she knew it too, and that made her fall complete.

She surrendered as the double bladed weapon hummed into incarnadine life without her fingers moving at all. This was her destiny. This was what she deserved. She didn’t just have darkness within her, this was where she belonged. The world went blank. And then the dark side replaced it.

She was one with the Force, it moved within her like a lover, thick and powerful. ‘Yes, my master,’ she said, bowing her head.


	19. I'm going to fight you now

‘You go straight to the dark,’ her lord murmured in appreciation. ‘Kneel, my beloved apprentice.’

She obeyed the command without question, dropping into position on the cold stone and, wheezing, he raised himself from his seat and hobbled carefully down from the dais to where she knelt. She breathed quietly, ready for whatever command he should give next, her eyes lowered in respect. There was a weight on the top of her head, a cold sensation and a crown of icy metal settled on her brow. Her lightsaber switched off.

‘Rise, apprentice.’ He flicked a finger at her, indicating the caverns past which she’d already trod. ‘Go. Locate more appropriate apparel and then we will discuss the remainder of your training.’

The Knights of Ren swept into a phalanx behind her as she strode back across the chamber, at home here as she had never been elsewhere. The crown on her head was of the dark side, a Sith artefact in the same way as the saber she carried but it felt natural, normal, although the skin where it was connecting with her skull tingled in an unpleasant manner, and she was beginning to get a headache. She was drawn to a small chamber on one side of the bridge and upon entering it, found it had been prepared as a bedroom, a grand divan strewn with black silk sheets in one corner, a heavy carved wardrobe in another. This place had been waiting for her all her life, as had the outfit hanging on the door, the cloth of the dress sheer, and much finer than any she had worn before, the black cloak diaphanous in the dim light. The Knights took up positions on the far side of the threshold and she was about to lock herself in to change when the sight of one of them stopped her.

There was something about the smallest warrior that niggled at the back of her mind. Rey felt a strange antagonism for her loyal servant which seemed at odds with her new role and she crooked a finger at the other woman, gesturing her into the chamber.

‘What is your name?’ she asked, sitting on the bed and raising her feet so that the Knight could remove her boots.

‘Ushar, mistress.’ The Knight bowed her helmeted head, and it must have been a struggle to see through that visor, but although Rey noted the woman’s clumsiness, she did not care, holding out her arms for her sleeves to be removed next.

‘I know you, I think. We have spoken before.’ There was a glimmer of something that didn’t belong as she said the words, something soft and uncomfortable, at odds with the hardness of her heart.

The woman unwound the cloth, performing the personal tasks without complaint, but Rey could feel the disdain pouring off her. ‘No, mistress. We fought once. The day that Kylo Ren introduced you as his whore. The beginning of his downfall.’

The name sounded vaguely familiar but she couldn’t put a face to it, and it made her feel uneasy. ‘I am no one’s whore. Watch your mouth,’ Rey snapped, her fingers inching towards her lightsaber.

‘I would know you anywhere. Years he had been without a woman and then you turn up, flaunting yourself in front of him, calling him master and fluttering your eyelashes.’ There was a bite in the other woman’s words, and she flung the discarded clothing onto the floor with disgust. ‘You made him weak. It is because of you that he is no longer our leader.’

Rey rose to her feet slowly, feeling the need to exert her authority. ‘Careful, Ushar, or I may begin to think that it is you who is the whore. You seem too fond of your previous master – perhaps he was more to you than that?’

The other woman snorted, a clear suggestion that this conversation was beneath her. ‘The Knights of Ren are a family. I could no more sleep with him than I could fuck my brother. You do not understand us. You are not fit to lead.’

A strange relief flared within Rey for a split second and then the dark side closed over her again like a wave and the emotion drowned within it. ‘Leave,’ Rey commanded, deciding suddenly that she was capable of dressing herself.

Appropriately garbed for her new post she swept back into the hall, flanked by her Knights, having to detour around the man holding the blue lightsaber in order to reach her place on the throne. She settled her skirts, resting her saberstaff on her knees, and her master nodded at her approvingly.

‘As you see, she stays of her own volition.’

‘You should have told me you wanted a throne, Rey,’ the interloper on the floor below chipped in. ‘I would have taken yours out of storage.’

The jovial tone earned him a glare. She didn’t know his name but he looked vaguely familiar, as if she’d walked past him somewhere once and shared a glance. He had a distinctive face, which might be what had jogged her memory, and he was looking at her with a concentration that belied the lightness of his words. The fact that he had brought a lightsaber into the presence chamber made him a threat though, and she looked over at her master with a question.

The old man nodded and she crooked a finger at her bodyguard. ‘Kill him.’

The man’s reaction to this order was not what she’d expected. Instead of demonstrating fear at the approach of the armoured Knights he waited until they had surrounded him and then swept into a formal bow. Each of the Knights acknowledged the action, either through a nod of the head, or the clang of a weapon hitting a breastplate and then they fell easily into a circling pattern, each of them taking up their place within the dance as if they knew the moves and had walked these steps before. She put her chin on her hand and watched, fascinated.

‘You’ll forgive me if I ask the Empress some questions before I die,’ the man announced suddenly, stepping out of the way of the first strike.

The second came at him from behind but he was ready, bending forward swiftly so that the heavy axe cut empty air above his back.

‘She has accepted her nature,’ the old man responded. ‘Nothing you say will make a difference to who she is.’

‘I’m well aware of that.’ The man pushed into a darting attack which would have connected with the shoulder of the largest Knight, had he not anticipated the move and blocked the lightsaber with his sword.

Sitting on the throne, Rey could have believed she was watching a choreographed routine, had the stakes not been so high. The Knights of Ren were loyal to her, and not the person they were fighting but the seven of them worked so well together it was hard to credit they had only just met. A third Knight rushed in from the side and when the man jumped to avoid the whirling mace he smiled as he landed, his hand throwing his attacker back with a push from the Force. Rather than being launched across the throne room, which was what Rey would have done to her adversary in that moment, the Knight simply sprawled on the floor, and took her time getting back up.

‘I believe you are from Jakku, Rey. What is it like?’ the man asked.

She glanced at her master for permission before she replied. ‘Sandy.’

‘Do you miss it?’ He span on his heel, caught a poorly executed chop on his lightsaber as it guarded his back and when he turned around he flicked an exaggerated grimace at the Knight who had delivered it.

‘No.’

‘Why not?’

The fight cycled into a new phase with half the Knights moving into a co-ordinated assault that the man had to exert himself to deflect but Rey noted that the other three Knights did nothing but watch, rather than rushing in themselves. She considered his question while she studied the melee.

Jakku seemed a long way away, the memory of heat and light, the scale of the horizon far from the dim throne room with its flashing lightning and claustrophobic, whispering walls. She had been a different person back then, she hadn’t known who she was. The recollection was like an itch at the back of her mind, it made her uncomfortable. She remembered the days spent grubbing through junk in the blistering heat of the desert, and the nights alone in the cold, scratching on the walls of her meagre shelter.

‘It was hot. I was hungry,’ she answered eventually.

‘But you had family there, didn’t you?’ he asked, out of breath and ducking under a flying fist, only to direct his own into the face of his attacker, who promptly collapsed onto the floor, unmoving. ‘Sorry,’ he said to the prone figure.

‘I was alone.’ That was her strongest impression of Jakku, the time spent alone, and even now, resting on her throne at the beginning of her new reign she could feel the sadness of the girl she had been pressing at the back of her mind.

‘You dreamed of an island. Who did you meet when you went there?’

Another of the Knights was disarmed and this time the Force push used to propel him close to the pit was strong enough that when he fell, he didn’t rise again. The man tackled the final of his three opponents in a blur of heavy blows, attack and defence evenly matched.

‘A Jedi.’ She remembered the hope with which she had gone to the island, the disappointment she’d found there. The memory came in feelings rather than words, rain on her face, wind in her hair, the emptiness in her heart as she was refused, time and time again.

‘Did he train you as a Jedi too?’ There was a tussle going on on the floor of the audience chamber, the back and forth trading of blows between the man and the armoured woman so compelling that the three remaining Knights had gathered around, seemingly forgetting that they were supposed to be killing the interloper, rather than applauding him or his opponent.

‘Yes,’ Rey answered, and then thought about that a little more. She didn’t remember being trained, that had come later she sensed, and the feelings that accompanied it were those of sadness and resignation. ‘No,’ she corrected herself eventually. ‘He didn’t.’

On the island she remembered nothing but frustration with the man she had gone to meet, and hope from someone she hadn’t expected. That was where he was from, she realised. The man fighting for his life had been on the island in the ocean, amidst the rain and the wind.

‘How did that make you feel?’

‘Alone. I had never felt so alone.’

‘So you said.’

She bent forward, scrutinising him. Who was this person who she knew but had forgotten? What was he to her? She clipped the saberstaff back on her belt, rested her elbows on her knees. This was important. Something deep down told her that listening to him was important and she didn’t want to miss a word.

He flung Rey a glance and what he saw made him falter, his weapon dropping, and his opponent took that moment to open up a long gash on his arm with her blade. He scowled, whipping around in a long, low spin that ended with the lightsaber connecting with her leg and Ushar fell to the ground, cursing, crawling out of the way as the remaining three Knights took up the attack.

‘But you weren’t alone,’ he continued between blows. ‘You went back to the Resistance. To your friends - General Dameron and the stormtrooper and the woman whose sister died. You weren’t alone with them, were you?’

Their faces flashed across her mind as his words conjured them from the depths of her memory. Her friends, her comrades, people she liked. But the feelings that came with these images were also not overwhelmingly positive. She felt their mistrust, the unease with which they regarded her and she knew that her place amongst them was tenuous at best. She didn’t feel happy when she brought the Resistance to mind, her emotions were the same as they had been all her life – everywhere she went, the same feeling followed.

‘I’m always alone,’ she acknowledged, the truth of it settling in her heart.

He was fighting harder now, but the minute she spoke his three remaining opponents were dispatched in quick succession, almost as if he had been delaying victory until her ruminations had come to an end. The first Knight flew so far over the pit that he was lost in the darkness, the second went down with a deep wound to his left arm and staggered off in search of medical treatment and the third simply buckled under a light tap to the head and collapsed to the floor.

The man with the lightsaber turned to face the throne, his face shiny with sweat, his eyes glowing with triumph. ‘You’re not alone. Do you know where you belong?’ he asked.

Rey came off the throne without checking with her master. She was more absorbed in the conversation she was having with this half stranger than with any command the dark side might want to give her.

‘She belongs with me,’ the old man answered, although the question was not directed at him.

Rey ignored him, igniting her saberstaff and beginning to circle the man who was probably her adversary. She was no longer as single minded as she had been. The saber crooned its familiar song of obedience, serenading her into the darkness but it no longer had complete control. Deep within her, out of reach of the thoughts which were supposed to be in charge, emotions stirred. Her stomach had always reacted more accurately than her head and right now it was filling with a strange kind of excitement.

‘I’m going to fight you now,’ the man said. This seemed like an unnecessary warning, given that he’d dropped into an opening stance that looked suspiciously like Ataru and had abandoned the casual lightsaber technique he’d deployed with the Knights. ‘We’re going to fight, and you’re going to lose.’

She raised her eyebrows at that, swishing the saberstaff threateningly but with a building exhilaration that she didn’t even try to contain. The minute he came at her all that was forgotten in the desperate need to defend herself. He was better at combat than she was, far better, displaying a level of skill and aggression she hadn’t glimpsed in his warm up battle with the Knights – that had clearly been a training sequence compared to this. He read her moves easily, anticipated her strikes and within a couple of exchanges she was on the back foot, being forced towards her throne with her saber locked in a defensive position while he rained one handed blows at her head. She slipped, went down and he was on her in an instant, her weapon cleaved in half with a swinging lunge, both blades extinguishing immediately as the pieces scattered across the floor. She raised her hand to defend herself, preparing for a massive counterblow with the Force but he threw his own weapon to the ground, his hand streaking out to pluck the crown from her head and throw it far across the hall. He grappled for her elbows, yanked her roughly to her feet and put his arms around her, pulling her in.

‘This is where you belong,’ he said.

The connection between them enveloped her as securely as his arms, bringing with it the forgotten comfort of companionship, unity, an understanding that did not exist with anyone else. It reminded her of the power that lived in the joining of their hands, of the joy that existed in the joining of bodies, the security that existed in the joining of minds.

‘Ben,’ she said, and she smiled at him, although the smile couldn’t convey the happiness spreading through her at his touch.

He tried to smile, she saw him make the effort but it died on his lips and his brow creased. ‘I’m sorry I lied to you,’ he said carefully, as if he had been rehearsing. ‘I don’t want you to forgive me, I just want you to know that I’m sorry.’

She attempted to brush it off, although the expression on his face told her that this was a subject that would need more than a smile to resolve. ‘I’m sorry I tried to kill you.’

The corner of his mouth twisted. ‘More than tried.’

She ran her fingers down his chest, over the dark fabric covering his stomach, searching for damage. ‘How are you here anyway?’

‘I healed myself.’ There was a slight tinge of disbelief in his tone.

‘How? That’s a lightside power.’

A faint colour highlighted his cheekbones. ‘I had help. I was dying, I think my heart stopped, but then my grandfather came to me and said that it wasn’t too late. Turns out who I want to be is a personal choice after all.’

Her questing fingers came back sticky with a smear of fresh blood. ‘It looks like you need a bit more practice.’

He rolled a shoulder. ‘It also turns out that not everyone is one thing or the other. You said I use the dark, but I hear the light and I can combine the two to find my own strength. Maybe you were right.’

She let herself fall into the healing trance she’d used many times before, let the Force flow through her, but when she opened her eyes, she found her fingertips were still covered in blood and the wound under his top had not completely healed. Frowning, she was going to try again but he shook his head.

‘Worry about it later.’ His head raised and his attention shifted away from her.

For the first time she was conscious of something that wasn’t related to the gloriously wide expanse of his chest or the wonder of having him close. Her vision was scarred with a bright blue glow, inconsistent but powerful, which appeared to be emanating from a light source behind her back and her ears filled with the frustrated crackling of pent up energy. She turned carefully, putting her chest to his back without losing the contact and her perception of the tender moment they were sharing changed. She was standing in a bubble, a translucent shield of power which protected her from the lightning which would otherwise have ripped her apart. Her master stood on the dais, risen from his throne as if he had never been fragile, and the only thing stopping the death arcing out of his hands was the cocoon that Ben had spun from the bond between them.

She glanced up and over her shoulder, catching the determination in his face, the steel in his eyes.

‘Now, I have to finish what my grandfather started.’


	20. The pit

‘That isn’t your grandfather?’

He didn’t look down, his eyes locked on his adversary and one hand raised, becoming a focal point for the lightning trying to blast them away. ‘When I realised you’d left the hotel with the Resistance I thought you’d need some time alone with them to explain. I also knew it was only a matter of time before the First Order staged a coup – and not that pathetic attempt by Hux – but I was more worried about the man who claimed to be family and his fleet. So I went to Endor, to the wreckage of the Death Star, the last place my grandfather had been alive and I searched the throne room for biological traces, biometrics, scans or records or anything that might help me identify who it was I’d met here, who it was who’d been sending me visions. Who it was I was up against.’ He nodded at the skeletal figure blasting death from its fingertips. ‘This is Emperor Palpatine. Or what’s left of him after the Death Star blew up.’

Rey reached behind her and wound her fingers through his free hand. ‘How is he still alive?’

‘I don’t know and I don’t care. All that matters is that I kill him.’ He squeezed her fingers although his attention was still focused on his enemy. ‘This man destroyed my entire family. There would be no Darth Vader if not for him. I would not have become Kylo Ren. My grandfather died as Anakin Skywalker, and he was very clear to point that out when I finally met him. He didn’t want me to become like him, he never spoke to me through his mask. Every voice I have ever heard inside my head has belonged to the Emperor, everything Snoke ever said was him, every time I thought my grandfather was showing me the darkness it was him. I am the man I am today because of him, and he’s about to face the consequences of that.’

Rey squeezed his fingers back. ‘You’re not the man you are today because of him, but in spite of him. You’re not Kylo Ren.’

‘I don’t think you are either, if it makes you feel any better. You asked the Knights to kill me and they went straight into a training drill instead – that’s basically mutiny as far as they’re concerned. You were in charge of them for all of five minutes – what did you say to make them dislike you so much?’

‘Nothing. I only spoke to Ushar.’

‘Hmmmm.’ His thumb sneaked into the gap between their fingers and stroked her palm, a simple gesture of affection that made her lower lip wobble. ‘Still jealous, I see.’

He was building up to something. This conversation was simply a delay while he worked himself up to a decision. She stood there holding his hand, chatting, while he used the power between them to block all the dark rage being flung their way but Rey had the distinct sense that he was preparing himself, although she wasn’t quite sure for what.

She clutched at his hand, harder this time. ‘Remember who you are,’ she urged him. ‘Don’t give in to hate, that was where I went wrong.’

His smile was sad. ‘I’ve managed to break everything I’ve ever touched. Now I’m going to make amends.’

He closed his eyes, and although they were still holding hands, she could tell he was putting as much distance between them as possible. There was a tug on the Force, a pull on the connection that bound them and Rey found the fluttering control that danced around when they touched dimming somehow, the raw power that he brought to the bond growing at the expense of her own contribution.

‘Let me do it,’ she whispered. ‘I can control it better than you.’

His eyes opened again, and there was a light in them that wasn’t usually there, the irises shading to gold. ‘This is my fight now,’ he said, although his lips didn’t actually move.

The shield dropped and in the single instant of time before the Sith lightning burnt them to a cinder, Ben threw the full power of the Force bond at the Emperor, calling up every scrap of power that either of them had ever possessed. She felt the bond drain from her in a torrent and with it came a flood of memories, recollections that weren’t her own as Ben flung every piece of himself at his enemy. She saw him through the failing connection, felt the fear and confusion of a little boy coming into his strength, the resentment and loneliness of the teenager sent away by his parents, the honed rage of the man he became, angry at everything and everyone, and at himself most of all. She saw how lost he had been, how solitary he was sealed away behind his mask, so hard on the outside, so miserable within. She saw the point at which he found the Sith holocron, the fascination he had felt for the woman in the image who had seemed to offer a way out of the mess he had made for himself, how his pursuit of her, when she was finally found, had led him to delve too deeply into her mind, too quickly, and had called out power that had always been hidden. In that moment, he had sealed his fate.

She saw the connection between them solidify, felt him begin to worm his way from under the weight of the darkness pushing him down the more they spoke, but then came her own face in Snoke’s throne room rejecting his hand, rejecting the future he wanted so desperately and then she felt him tip over the edge again, back into the shadows. But he hadn’t forgotten. He had spent a year longing for what might have been, sending out probe after probe, spy after spy to track her down, obsessively combing through Resistance broadcasts in the long hours of the night to find some trace of her, and then despising himself for this weakness. His mother died and the depth of his mourning shocked him, because he’d thought that all his tears had already been shed. Then Rey herself was back, and his yearning was so great he was willing to try anything to have her, sacrifice anything because he couldn’t bear to lose her again. The depth of his love for her was frightening.

But he wasn’t thinking about her any more. He picked up every emotion he’d ever had, brought them together and turned them into power. He had always been fierce, and passionate, and prone to excess and it was this he was using to fuel his attack, bashing away at all the painful memories he held as he had once hit his side in the snow to gain more strength. He couldn’t carry on like this. Even as an observer Rey could feel that this use of power was too expensive, he was burning himself up in an attempt to destroy his opponent through sheer force alone. But power was nothing without control, and Ben wasn’t drawing on her except as a power source. He was the engine, she was the pilot and without her he was going to crash.

There was a moment in which it seemed to be working though, in which the force of the lightning attacking them weakened and the wheezing of the mask became more apparent. Rey couldn’t see the Emperor’s face, but the conflagration gave more light and it was obvious that he was struggling, as his shoulders hunched and he retreated back onto the throne as he absorbed Ben’s power. But then his fingers straightened, the bony digits strengthening and Ben’s hand moved fractionally as he anticipated a renewed attack, with the shield he had placed around them reforming and the torrent of power diminishing in consequence. However, the Emperor did not shoot at the couple in front of him; to Rey’s horror, he directed his bolts at the floor.

The cavern heaved as the lightning hit it, rolling and bucking as the stone reacted to being walloped dead on with dark side energy and the first tremors of an earthquake rippled through the rock. Rey staggered, steadied herself on Ben’s hand and then the second quake hit, much stronger than the first, and the section of the floor on which she was standing abruptly raised high into the air, separating itself from the rest of the cave bed with a roar. She tried, but the seismic manoeuvring was too much even for her abilities to counteract and without quite knowing how it happened, she let go of Ben’s hand. The earth shook, breaking itself into chunks in front of the throne and she fell, landing heavily on her hands and knees with ringing in her ears and the taste of dust in her mouth.

Ben had fared much worse. She spotted him through the gloom, a shuttle length away on the opposite side of the room, sprawled full length with a small pool of blood already gathering where his stomach wound had re-opened, trying to raise his head and failing. Ignoring her, the Emperor tottered forward, his steps doddering, the medical apparatus ripped from his face to reveal a puffy white visage, the skin sagging as if it had slid from his bones before the decay was arrested. He was moving slowly, barely on his feet, but his intentions were clear. Rey scrambled up, slipping on the loose rock now strewn all over the floor, scrabbling to reach Ben before his enemy had time to get there.

She was too late even before she set off. Poised for attack, the old man took up a position over the body of the younger one, who raised a hand weakly.

‘Now you will die,’ the Emperor intoned, lifting a single finger to propel Ben’s limp form into the air. ‘And the Empress will take her place on the throne. When she has birthed your children and I have raised them as my own, they will begin a new generation of Sith. Think on that, as you fall.’

Ben’s eyes sought Rey but although his mouth moved, no words came. Instead, slowly, and carefully, as if he was putting all his remaining effort into the action, he smiled.

Then his body jerked and span head over heels as the Emperor threw him into the pit and Rey was left alone.

She had spoken to him too much about making amends. She stared at the empty air he’d occupied and that was the first thought that came into her mind. She’d tried to make him say sorry for what he’d done ages ago on that balcony on Dorumaa and he’d told her he’d make amends in his own way. Then she’d told him to apologise to Rose and she’d asked him to stand trial and he’d refused both of those options as well. She’d attempted to murder him as a way of forcing him to atone for lying to her and he’d dodged that too. But this was his way of paying back some of what he owed. He’d come to rescue her but that hadn’t been his only aim. His plan had been to kill the Emperor or die trying, and he’d only succeeded in the second of those two objectives. The distance she’d felt from him, the decision he’d been preparing himself for, had been his way of saying goodbye.

He hadn’t wanted her forgiveness, that had been clear since the first time they’d had sex, but only now did she realise why. He had fallen to the light, learned the error of his ways and decided for himself that the only way to achieve redemption was to sacrifice himself in the most meaningful way possible, by completing what his grandfather had started and bringing an end to the threat of the dark side.

Except that the dark side had fallen to its knees and was currently dragging itself across the floor towards the throne by its fingernails. Without the mechanical apparatus keeping him alive it seemed that the Emperor was only hanging on through sheer determination, Ben’s attack having robbed him of the majority of his strength. Rey started towards him, flinging out her hand but the blue lightsaber had gone with Ben into the pit, or was buried under a pile of stone somewhere, and that wasn’t the weapon that answered her call. Instead, the two halves of the broken Sith saber whizzed across the room, flying into her outstretched hands.

The Emperor raised his head, his blind, white eyes seeking the source of the noise and he sat up, his hands raising in preparation for another attack. It was an attack Rey knew she could not withstand on her own. Ben had drained the bond of much of its power but he wasn’t around to complete the circuit anyway, so any reserves of energy which might still be left were inaccessible to her without the other half of the dyad. She was alone.

Luckily, she’d had a lot of experience in being alone, as Ben had reminded her only a few minutes ago and it failed to frighten her. Her lips tightened on a mirthless smile. He really did know her better than she thought. Despite the fact that she’d been holding a dark side saber and wearing a dark side crown it hadn’t changed who she was – the woman who had once been alone, but who now belonged. As long as she remembered that lesson, this plan would work.

She dropped to her knees, held out the pieces and bowed her head. ‘Forgive me, master,’ she said.

The Emperor pushed himself upright, took a few shaky steps in her direction but his defensive pose didn’t falter and he kept his hands raised. ‘You betrayed me, apprentice.’

‘Punish me, master,’ she grovelled, placing the saber carefully on the floor and curling both arms deliberately over her belly. She had no idea if she really was pregnant, but the Emperor seemed to believe it and if he thought she might give birth to a new generation of Force wielding, dark side Skywalker children he would be less likely to terminate her.

His hands lowered fractionally. ‘You will demonstrate your loyalty. Pick up your weapon.’

‘Yes, master,’ she promised, keeping her eyes on the broken pieces and noting the way they shimmered as the Force touched them, as the two halves melded themselves back together under the influence of the old man’s mind.

She picked up the blades, and, under the silent threat of the fingers still pointing in her direction took a deep breath and turned them on. The dark side coagulated in her veins, drowning her senses, dripping into her thoughts and turning them black. But somewhere deep inside herself Rey did not forget who she was. The part of her that felt and did not think remained pure, untainted by the poison flooding her system. She held onto the certainty in her gut while shadow poured through her mind. She was not alone, not any more.

‘You will eliminate the Knights of Ren,’ came the order and she bowed her head.

‘Yes, master.’ He would think that the weapon controlled her because on every previous occasion it had, she had never fought the darkness – it had always made her its slave. No more. She rose to her feet demurely, took two paces past him, then whirled and sliced him in half with the red blades.

Palpatine fell with shock in his eyes and disbelief on his lips, the two halves slopping onto the rock floor with a disgusting smack of flesh, black mucus spilling out of his torso where blood should have been. He fell as if whatever it was that had been animating his body had been released, the body itself discarded, tumbling gracelessly to the floor without so much as a twitch, no last breath, no final words, no outstretched hand. But a wind roared through the chamber with the power of a tornado, and in its wake the whispering which had always hovered on the edge of hearing built into a shout.

Rey turned, seeking the source of the noise and for the first time noticed that the walls of the audience hall were not solid rock but made up of banks of seating, concealed in the darkness. In each of these seats sat a robed figure and each of them was cheering. She froze, unaware until now that she’d had an audience and dreading the moment in which this audience would realise that she’d killed the Emperor and move to attack. There were thousands of them, there was no way she could fight them all. But they didn’t stop cheering. Some of them were on their feet, others waved their arms, still more began to clap. Then the room was full of it, thunderous applause, loud enough to bring the roof down if it continued much longer.

Still holding the saber, Rey’s brain was sluggish but the dark side overlay on her thoughts gave her an insight into the reaction of the crowd. She too felt an echo of exultation at the sight of the fallen ruler, and a sense of the rightness of his death, how fitting it was that the old guard should pass and a new successor should rise. This was how it was for the Sith, she realised, the apprentice was supposed to surpass the master and take his place. Extinguishing her saberstaff, she reached out a hesitant hand and summoned the crown that Ben had tossed away. She raised it slowly and then, to tumultuous hollering from the stands, placed it firmly on her head.

With careful steps she ascended the dais, turned, and seated herself on the throne. The crowd went wild, their feet stamping on the stone so loudly that the walls of the chamber shook. In that moment Rey heard the call of the darkness as she had never heard it before, but it had lost the power to take over, the light spoke with a quiet, steady voice inside her and she listened to its words. Even here, although she was alone in the midst of the dark side, she knew that it would pass and she would find the place she belonged once again.

With that in mind, she crooked her finger at one of the six figures hovering in the shadows at the back of the throne, figures which had come slinking back at some stage during the past confrontation and were now skulking around, trying not to be noticed.

Ushar bowed her head, and said in her usual surly tone, ‘Mistress.’

‘Find Kylo Ren,’ Rey ordered. ‘And bring him to me.’

It was the best she could do under the circumstances. Without the audience she’d have dived into the pit headfirst in an attempt to find him, but she couldn’t take on this many enemies and hope to survive. Besides, she was sitting on the Sith throne, and as far as she knew there was still a Sith fleet hovering above Exegol, a fleet which somebody was going to need to destroy. Alone, she didn’t have the power to move so much as a single Star Destroyer, let alone find some cunning way to blow them all up so she was going to need help. Specifically, she was going to need help from the Resistance, whose bombers would be more than a day’s journey away by now.

But how could she possibly get a message through to her allies, sitting as she was in the middle of her enemies? There were buttons on the arms of the throne marked in a language that her dark side brain helpfully recognised as Sith, and tapping on a few of them brought a fresh cracking noise and the ceiling above the throne split in two, the halves retracting with a painful mechanical whine to reveal the sky above, a sky studded with glittering ships, all mobilised and ready to attack.

Rey considered her options. In theory, she could take a short trip through the Force to find Poe and let him know she was ready to assist him in any raid he might want to plan, but in practice, with the Force bond depleted and the darkness hammering to get in around the edges of her resolve, travel was unlikely to be possible. She could send a coded long range message but the chances of that slipping unnoticed through the massed Sith technology now at her disposal were slim to none – she simply did not yet know these systems well enough to be able to crack them. She could always put out a galaxy wide message announcing her ascension, providing her location and giving everyone a decent period of time in which to mount a rebellion against her, but that would only confirm her friends’ worst fears about which side of the conflict she was now on.

She toyed with the switches, unsure which course of action to take. Being Supreme Leader was hard, she wasn’t sure how Ben had managed it this last year, all on his own, and his desire for her to join him suddenly took on a whole new dimension. She’d just determined on the galaxy wide broadcast when a warning signal sounded from the arm of the throne. Enemies were approaching.

She turned her eyes upwards, and with a spasm of fear in her gut she watched a First Order Star Destroyer hove into view in the upper atmosphere. As she watched it was joined by tens, then hundreds of others, supported by a bevy of smaller craft, flurrying around the massive ships like ants locating a corpse. The navy had arrived.

And Rey of Jakku, last of the Jedi, member of the Resistance, Empress of the galaxy, was now in charge of a fleet so powerful she could do absolutely anything she wanted. The dark side sang in her head. Voices she didn’t recognise whispered to her in a dead language she had never heard spoken and the saberstaff grew warm in her hands. But still she heard the call to the light. And then, something more.

A call sign, a familiar code, a bright speck somewhere up in the heavens that she couldn’t make out with the naked eye. She pressed a few buttons and a display appeared above her head, mapping out the outlines of the ships against an information chart detailing their names, weapons capabilities and complements. There it was, right next to the First Order flagship, a craft that shouldn’t have been anywhere near an enemy vessel voluntarily, a ship that the First Order hated, and would never willingly have let so close. The Millennium Falcon. And it wasn’t alone.

As she watched, the entire Resistance armada emerged from the hyperlane above Exegol and took up position facing the Imperial hordes, each of the smaller ships ranging itself next to a First Order Destroyer until the combined fleet stretched across the stars.

Rey took a moment to experience complete and absolute surprise, and then abandoned her fears about being discovered, opening a short range channel to Poe’s X-Wing.

‘Oh. Hi Rey,’ the pilot answered after an uncharacteristically long period. ‘How’s the weather on Ahch-To?’

‘Rainy.’ Rey tried to spot his craft but with so many others on the radar it was impossible. ‘What are you up to?’

‘I’m a little busy at the moment, can I call you back in ten?’

His confidence was staggering. ‘Is something going on? I felt a disturbance in the Force.’

The disturbance was right above her head, and Rey was pretty sure it would have disturbed anyone, Force or not.

‘Sort of.’ She didn’t miss the smug tone in Poe’s response. ‘I’m sitting right above Exegol about to destroy the Sith fleet.’

‘How?’

‘The Resistance negotiated a truce with the First Order. Or maybe it was the other way around. Doesn’t matter. Not long after you left we got word that Kylo Ren had mysteriously died in mysterious circumstances which I’m sure had nothing to do with you, and General Hux had taken over as Supreme Leader. He called me straight after, said that because he was expecting Ren to get murdered he’d taken steps to get rid of Pryde as well and now he was in charge he wanted to discuss our mutual enemy. The enemy of my enemy is my friend sort of thing. Hux reckoned the Emperor would try to take over, with Ren dead and you disappeared and he didn’t want that happening. Hux has waited a long time for power, he’s not going to give it up easily. He didn’t have the resources to take down the Emperor himself, the Sith fleet is much too big, so we agreed to collaborate. Together we’ll take down the fleet, blast Exegol into smithereens before the Emperor can escape and then we’ll – hang on, I’ve got another call coming in…’

There was a crackling on the line and Poe turned his attention elsewhere. ‘Yeah, I agree, doesn’t look like they’ve primed their weapons so we’ve got less than a minute. Remember what I said Supreme Leader, go for the ventral cannons. We’ll cover you.’ There was more static as Poe switched channels again. ‘Resistance armada – here we go. You have your positions, the First Order have extended their shields to cover us, but we need to engage the Sith Destroyers long enough for our Destroyers to target their cannons. May the Force be with us.’ The crackling was back. ‘Yeah, with you too. No, I’m not sure it works for your side, but what the hell.’

The line cut out and Rey’s comms equipment was full of blinking lights, as the commanders of the Imperial fleet requested orders from their Emperor. She raised her head, conscious that the cheering in the hall had faded out and had now been replacing by suspicious muttering. Although she had spoken quietly, she was sure that her conversation with the Resistance had been intercepted, and she probably had moments left before the audience mustered enough courage to rebel. The minute they contacted the Sith fleet above a single well placed cannon shot would obliterate the throne room and her with it. Her final act as Empress was to re-route weapons controls from every Sith Destroyer to the throne itself, and then lock the controls with the most complex password she could come up with a short notice.

The she strode towards the pit. ‘Ushar?’

The woman materialised out of the darkness at the edge of the chasm. ‘No life signs, mistress. And no body either. We’ve been in to check.’

Rey considered that for a moment. Ben could float, she’d seen him do it on his flagship when they’d kissed, and she found it hard to believe that if he had gone into the pit awake he wouldn’t have caught himself before the bottom and floated back up to continue the fight. But just to make sure she asked another question.

‘Are there any vessels missing from the Exegol manifest? The First Order command shuttle, for example?’

‘No, mistress. But no extra ships were recorded as landing after your arrival either. I don’t think he came here in a shuttle.’

That made sense. If he had travelled to Exegol by tracking her through the Force that would explain the lack of a ship, and it would also explain why he wasn’t in the pit. If he had been unconscious, maybe because he’d hit his head on the way down, then the bond would have broken, and he’d have ended up right back where he’d travelled from in the first place. She had only to go and find him. First though, she would need to leave Exegol, because the same rules applied to her, if she went to Ben through the Force right away, the minute the bond broke she’d be right back on Exegol again, although by then Poe would have blown it up and she’d find herself Empress of a floating pile of ash. She started for the command shuttle with a swing in her step and then stopped when she realised she was being followed.

The Knights of Ren froze the minute she turned her head, duty bound to obey her, but reluctant to do so. 

‘I don’t want your service,’ she clarified. ‘I didn’t earn it. Find someone else to be your master or better still, don’t.’

None of them said anything, but the largest Knight nodded, and another shifted his sword in a way that might have meant he was grateful. Rey didn’t care, hurrying across the ruined floor of the presence chamber and picking up speed until she hit the ramp of the command shuttle at a run. Priming the engines, she set a course as far away from the firefight above as she could manage and blasted off into open space, unnoticed by any of the Resistance or First Order vessels firing indiscriminately, or the Imperial ships attempting to defend themselves without their offensive weapons.

She set a course for Ahch-To, partly because that was where she was supposed to be, and partly because she needed a safe place to nurse Ben back to health. It was highly likely he was lying on a planet somewhere, maybe even back on Kef Bir, unconscious and bleeding from a stomach wound that she would need to try to heal. Pushing the shuttle to the limits of its capability she made the journey quickly and didn’t even bother to lower the ramp when she landed, grabbing a few bacta patches from the medical supplies just in case and then thinking very hard about Ben, the way she’d felt when he put his arms around her that last time, like she was coming home.

It didn’t work. The usual blur of travel failed to materialise and when she opened her eyes only the twisted insides of the shuttle met her confused stare. She focused again, screwing up her face in concentration, trying for an older memory, something more explicit. Again she opened her eyes to find herself still in the command shuttle, just behind the pilot’s chair. She sifted quickly through her awareness of the Force, finding nothing amiss. She had never been able to sense whether Ben was alive or dead, which she’d put down to the strength of the bond between them, they were bound together in life or death, and just because he’d stopped breathing didn’t mean she’d feel any different. The thought made her panic and she squeezed her eyes shut, trying once again to locate him, but her feet remained firmly in the same place and when she opened her eyes the shuttle mocked her disappointment.

She couldn’t find him through the Force. The connection he’d shown her how to operate had shut down and without it she had no way to locate him. But the Force had always connected them, why would it choose this moment to stop? She had only felt this kind of absence once before, when she’d looked into the heart of things and found someone missing, and it had happened right here on Ahch-To. There could only be one reason that she couldn’t reach Ben, and it was the same reason she hadn’t been able to find Luke, more than a year ago.

Ben had closed himself off from the Force. He didn’t want to be found.


	21. How it should have ended

These woods were old, the boles of the trees gnarled and twisted with age and Rey’s feet passed softly over the leaf litter leaving no trace. The daily cycle on this planet was ending, light slanting in streamers of gold through the canopy high above, the leaves rustling with a comforting sound as they were caressed by the breeze. It was warm here, although the seasons were turning and from somewhere in the distance the call of a bird rang out, its melody drifting between the trees.

Rey picked her way carefully across the ground following no discernible trail but the one on her scanner, locked on to something that might possibly represent the craft she was looking for, but almost certainly did not. This was the third planet she had visited in the last four days, pursuing the cross quartered grid across the Outer Rim she’d devised eight weeks ago.

She’d waited on Ahch-To until the last shots of the war above Exegol had been fired, and then she’d contacted Supreme Leader Hux. It had taken some time to get his attention, because he had an empire to run, and a set of new allies who insisted on getting involved every time he mentioned his empire, allies who didn’t seem to think the empire was his at all, in fact. Rey had to remind him to whom he owed that empire, and heavily imply what she’d done to the previous Supreme Leader before he’d even take her call. When he’d finally found a slot in his busy schedule and she’d demanded the current co-ordinates of Kylo Ren’s tracker he’d raised his eyebrows at her.

‘But the traitor is dead. I saw the scans of Kef Bir and I had a team down to the wreckage to check for a body not long after you left. There was no trace of him, he must have been washed into the sea.’

‘You’re probably right, but I just need to make sure. Did you find a Resistance shuttle on the Death Star wreckage by the way?’

There had been a very long silence on the other end of the line. ‘There was no shuttle. The tracker was deactivated but I can reactivate it again and send you the co-ordinates. Tell me – if you do find a, a loose end, what will you do?’

‘I’ll finish what I started,’ she grated.

That promise seemed to pacify Hux although Rey was certain he’d have people out following the tracker as well, because the last thing he’d want was the previous Supreme Leader popping back up to challenge his new found power. She was off the minute the command shuttle received the tracker’s current location, hoping that she’d get to Ben before Hux did, but she needn’t have worried, because the tracker’s signal led only to a discarded pair of boots in a dumpster on Naboo. Given the refuse collection schedule, Rey was at least a day behind him. 

Her next call was placed to Maz, in search of a code breaker who specialised in financial transactions. It took a while to get in touch with someone with the required level of expertise combined with the requisite lack of morals, and Rey had to trade in the command shuttle for something less expensive in order to scrape together enough credits to pay for the services she wanted. After a tense wait, during which she used the rest of her resources on a couple of kyber crystals, the hacker she’d hired reported that any and all funds which might have been left in the credit accounts of General Organa had been transferred out shortly after her death, and the accounts to which they had been transferred had now also been emptied and closed. No accounts had been opened with any of the major banking institutions in either of the names Ben might have used, although, as the hacker pointed out, no one trying to hide would have been stupid enough to use their own name anyway and there were plenty of less reputable institutions prepared to set up credit facilities without recognised identification.

The only speck of hope came from the records of transactions made around breakfast time from a particular room in a particular hotel on Dorumaa, which could be traced through the establishment’s comms system. This led to the call sign and original registration identity of a small freighter, with upgraded engines much too powerful for its size and weapons systems entirely unsuitable for extended conflict, indicating this was a ship built for flight, rather than fight. The sale had been completed and the ship collected four days before Rey traced it, and the recording of the person who had come to pick it up showed a short, heavily muscled man dressed in dark clothing whose face she didn’t recognise.

Wherever Ben was now, he didn’t want to be found and he’d gone to some trouble to cover his tracks, knowing that she’d be looking for him. This did not make Rey angry, and nor did it discourage her, because the memory of his smile lodged in her thoughts and every time she considered giving up, that smile came back to haunt her. Ben Solo had not been upset by his impending departure into the pit, rather, he had welcomed it and gone smiling to his doom, rather than raging like Kylo Ren would have done. That smile kept her going, kept her checking through each grid square on her map of the Outer Rim, and would keep her going until wild space had been explored and the Unknown Regions charted as well.

The woods opened out into a small clearing, the trees having been recently felled in a ring of sap oozing stumps and in the middle of the space sat a small ship, a modified light freighter from the Corellian YT series, although the 2400 model he had chosen was faster than the Falcon, and much easier to pilot alone. There was no way of knowing whether this vessel still belonged to the man she was seeking or had been sold on quickly to someone else, so after a perfunctory check, which confirmed that the doors were locked and alarmed, she continued towards the next reading on the scanner.

A short distance through the trees the sound of the birds became more frequent and the forest thinned out, the mulch underfoot becoming more dispersed as it was mixed with sand. She found herself on the shore of a shallow lake which stretched out into the distance, the single star around which this planet orbited sinking below the horizon far off in the distance. To her right a cabin had been constructed on the edge of the forest, its back protected by the trees but with the wide deck at the front facing out over the lake. The single storey dwelling was constructed entirely of logs, enormous serried trunks hammered onto a sturdy frame, the roof shingles aged and covered in moss, a blackened chimney poking out of the roof. The place itself looked like it had stood for years, its reassuring bulk not noticing the passing of the seasons or the visitors it protected within its timber walls.

Nothing moved behind the small windows. No life signs were present. Passing the two rocking chairs set out on the porch Rey found the front door unlatched, a crude wooden mechanism the only means with which it could be fastened; whoever lived here had no need for security. She pushed it open cautiously, and stepped over the threshold. This was about as far from the stark colours and straight lines of the First Order as it was possible to get – everything inside the cottage was higgledy-piggledy, crooked with age, rough hewn and rustic. The front door gave directly into the living room, which was dominated by a stone built, inglenook fireplace in which lay charred logs, burnt down to ashen shells in a sturdy metal frame. There was a shaggy rug in front of the fire and behind it sat an enormous sofa, heaped with cushions and fleece throws in various shades of white. A couple of books sat on a side table and Rey imagined that it was quite dark in here at night, lit only by the flickering of the fire. She gave the kitchen a cursory glance, opened the wooden cupboards in case any personal effects should have been left lying around. The room was spotlessly clean and apart from a solitary cup on the work surface nothing appeared out of place.

Whoever had built the cabin had invested in the fresher, which was fitted with running water and contained both a shower and large metal bath, glinting copper in the twilight seeping in through the window. The bedroom held a double bed in a wooden frame, the covers neatly made, with another selection of blankets stacked across the end. This place must get cold at night. Although the cottage was clean and tidy it bore no sign of habitation and no clue as to where the owner of the shuttle might have gone, and Rey felt the usual disappointment begin to settle in her bones. This was to be another fruitless mission.

‘Whatever you have to say to him, I’ve already said.’

Rey jumped at these words, not so much with surprise that they had come from nowhere, but because she recognised the speaker, and he was supposed to be dead.

‘Master Luke?’

Her reluctant teacher, almost master, the man whose bloody minded refusal to be of any practical assistance whatsoever had driven her to his nephew in the first place had materialised on the opposite side of the bed, dressed in the full Jedi robes she hated to wear, glowing brightly blue in the gloom. He bore the same kind of concerned frown he’d worn most of the brief time in which she’d known him, although death appeared to have smartened up his hair and beard slightly.

‘You look…well,’ he commented. ‘Is that a new lightsaber?’

Rey was all too aware that well was the last thing she looked. She hadn’t stopped moving for the last eight weeks, travelling from one planet to the next, crossing targets off her grid in the same way she’d once marked her walls, rarely stopping for sleep or food. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d washed and her face felt greasy, her hair hanging limp in its buns.

‘I lost yours. I made a new one.’ She demonstrated, flicking the switch of her new yellow saberstaff, the beams appearing from both ends and disappearing just as quickly as she clipped it back onto her belt; she hadn’t come here to fight. She no longer wore the red blades, but the Sith saber was permanently stored on her shuttle as a reminder, and a warning. ‘He’s here then?’

Luke let out a heavy sigh. ‘Not at the moment. Those people came for him again and I don’t know when he’s coming back. Or if.’ He sounded more like a crotchety grandfather than a Jedi master.

‘What people?’

‘The Knights of Ren.’ He spread his hands in a world weary gesture. ‘I’ve told him that they’re not a good influence, and that he should take some time to sit and meditate on what’s happened and what he wants to do next but he just shouts at me to shut up. Turning back to the light hasn’t improved his temper.’

Rey folded her arms. She’d suspected that Ben’s continued disappearance might have required help but she hadn’t thought he’d fled back into the arms of Ushar and her cronies quite so quickly. Maybe she had come here to fight after all. ‘What’s he doing with them?’

‘Hunting, apparently. He has them chasing down Sith loyalists, escapees from Exegol, First Order supporters, some man who barged into him in a bar, anyone really. It’s just an excuse for a fight. He’s looking for a way out.’

‘I know exactly what he’s looking for,’ she answered grimly. ‘I’m here to make sure he doesn’t find it.’

Luke smiled for the first time, although it was thin and fleeting. ‘It’s good to see you.’

‘Get out.’ The order was sharp, the delivery loud and Rey felt her shoulders stiffen instinctively at the anger within it.

She pivoted slowly, struggling to maintain a neutral expression as relief surged through her stomach, dragging happiness in its wake. The man across the other side of the room looked almost as well as she did. Dark circles rimmed his eyes and he had lost weight, the black trousers and shirt he wore bagging slightly round the waist, the short grey jacket too loose on the shoulders. She blinked at the blaster on his hip.

‘No,’ she answered and his gaze neatly avoided hers, flicking to the ghost on the other side of the room.

‘Not you – him.’ He addressed his uncle directly. ‘I’ve told you before, I don’t need you interfering in my life. I didn’t want to talk to you when you were alive, and I certainly don’t want to talk to you now you’re dead. Get out.’

Luke shrugged apologetically at Rey. ‘Same temper,’ he sighed, fading back into the shadows.

Rey faced Ben for the first time in nearly two months, for the first time since he’d smiled at her on his way into the pit. He wasn’t smiling now. In fact, he looked more miserable than she’d ever seen him, standing there with his skin smeared and dirty, a defeated cast to his bearing that she didn’t recognise.

He wasn’t able to meet her gaze but gestured in the direction of the door. ‘I wish you hadn’t come,’ he said.

She followed the unspoken suggestion, retracing her steps across the lounge to the front door and stepping back outside into the gathering darkness. ‘But you knew I would,’ she said calmly, taking a seat on one of the rocking chairs, waiting for him to do the same. ‘That’s why you’ve been hiding.’

The silence grew and lengthened as shadow crept across the deck.

He gave in before she did. ‘You’re better off without me. Everyone is.’

She waited for more – he would have rehearsed this conversation in the same way she had.

‘That time you tried to kill me, when you were holding the Sith saber, I thought you’d remember who you were if I reminded you that you loved me, but it didn’t work. Whatever you felt had changed. I took the one person left in the whole galaxy who had any sort of regard for me and made her hate me enough to leave me for dead. But that’s not all. I killed my father. I broke my mother’s heart. I can’t even count the number of other people I hurt one way or another. The galaxy is better off without me, and so are you. I decided that before I went to face the Emperor. I didn’t expect to survive, or even particularly want to.’

She cleared her throat noisily and he glanced up, surprised at the interruption. ‘You wanted to sacrifice yourself nobly so that your life would mean something, so that when people talked about you they’d say you were just like Darth Vader.’

He frowned at her. ‘I wasn’t thinking about what people would say, and I wasn’t trying to be noble, I was doing the right thing.’

Rey pulled a loose thread on her dirty sleeves. ‘It was the right thing to leave me to face the Emperor alone? And then to abandon me afterwards?’

‘No,’ he held out a placatory hand. ‘I hit my head on the way down. When I regained consciousness, the bond was broken and I was back on your shuttle on the forest moon where I’d parked it. I would have come back but the fight was already over.’ His expression turned melancholy. ‘You were better off without me in the end anyway. You’d have seen that eventually.’

She wasn’t letting him off that easily. ‘Your father died trying to get you to admit you were wrong. Explain to me how it was the right thing to take the life that he paid for with his own, and throw it away like his death meant nothing.’

Ben’s eyes widened as her words hit him but his mouth tightened in anger.

She pressed on regardless. ‘And you’re right. You broke your mother’s heart. So tell me how it was right to play the hero and sacrifice yourself instead of doing one single practical thing to honour her memory? Which do you think she would have preferred – you dead in your moment of glory or you using all that power and skill to rebuild even a fraction of what you destroyed? Do you think she wanted you dead? I don’t.’

‘It doesn’t matter what she wanted,’ he shot back bitterly. ‘Because she’s dead, and my father’s dead and my uncle’s dead. That’s a silver lining at least. My family is all dead and soon I’ll be dead too and that will be the end of the whole sorry saga. What did you think was going to happen? After everything I’ve done you really think I’d be allowed to atone for my sins? Go on trial and spend the rest of my days doing penance? There was never a way out of this that didn’t involve me dead and I was stupid to think there might be.’

She crossed her ankles, sat back in her chair. ‘So what you’re saying, is that you’re alone?’

‘Of course I’m alone,’ he spat. ‘You know I’m alone. And if I die fighting on some remote planet no one’s going to care, no one’s going to be sorry.’

She cut across the self-pity. ‘Do you know where you belong?’

He finally saw where she was going and his hands gripped the carved arms of the chair to propel himself forwards and out of her reach, but she’d learned too much from him and she moved faster than he could react.

‘This is where you belong.’

For a second his hand was just a hand underneath hers, his skin just skin, and then the connection between them smashed aside the barriers he’d erected against her and roared its power as it joined them both. He pulled a face, feeling the familiarity of the link as she did and he extracted his hand, wiping it on his trousers.

‘Irrelevant,’ he said, and his voice was cold. ‘As you once said to me, the bond is just the Force. It means nothing.’

She sighed, as if she were defeated. ‘True. But the Force isn’t really why you came back to save me after I nearly killed you, is it? It’s not why you lied to me in the first place or why you asked me to join you a year ago.’

He stared out over the lake, the last of the sun etching his profile. ‘Also irrelevant. You never felt the same.’

‘And yet I’m here anyway. Why do you think that is?’

The deck plunged into darkness as the sun dipped below the horizon, the last lingering traces still brightening the sky far out over the water, while Rey sat in the black with only the sound of Ben’s despair for company.

‘You’re here to tell me it’s over between us, although I guessed that anyway. Or worse, you’re here to forgive me. I don’t want your pity.’

‘I came to finish what I started.’

There was a rustle as he opened his arms. ‘Take your best shot. I’m not going to fight you.’

‘I meant, I’m going to save you from yourself.’

‘You don’t know me, I’m not worth saving. We were never friends. All we’ve ever done together is fight and argue, you said it yourself. Forget me and move on.’

‘I came to remind you who you are, like you reminded me,’ she answered patiently.

‘I barely know who I am anymore, there’s nothing to remember.’

‘You are the same as everyone else. You are normal. You are ordinary. You make mistakes and then you make up for them.’

He gave a huff of fake amusement. ‘I’m not the same as everyone else, my mistakes are on a galactic scale.’

‘Then you’ll just have to try harder to make amends. Go on fighting Sith with the Knights of Ren, join the Resistance, train a new generation of Jedi with me but stop feeling sorry for yourself.’

‘Fighting is exactly what I’ve been doing.’

‘No, you’ve been looking for an easy way out. Five minutes of noble self-sacrifice doesn’t buy you redemption. You’re going to have to get up every day, accept what you’ve done and try to do better. Who you want to be is a personal choice and you need to carry on making the right decision for the rest of your life. That’s making amends.’

There was a heavy sigh. ‘And it’s that or join the Resistance? I’d rather carry on feeling sorry for myself.’

‘Train a new generation of Jedi.’

‘There is no new generation of Jedi. I don’t think you and I count as an old generation of Jedi either.’

She sat back in her chair, readied herself. ‘There will be a new generation of Jedi in about seven months time, give or take.’

There was a pregnant pause while the sound of distant birds sighed on the wind and tiny waves lapped at the lake shore. Then he was on his feet, fumbling for her hand and yanking her after him into the cabin.

‘Luke,’ he yelled. ‘I know you’ve been eavesdropping.’

The silent blue crackle of a Force ghost materialised in the middle of the living room and opened its mouth to make a comment.

‘Stay exactly where you are,’ Ben commanded. ‘I need the light.’

He strode over to the fireplace, threw a couple of logs into the grate and ignited them with his blaster.

Luke rolled his eyes although he didn’t seem too cross at being used as a human torch. ‘Congratulations,’ he mouthed to Rey, and then vanished.

The yellow glow of the fire softened the angular face in front of her, his eyes huge and abnormally shiny. ‘Say that again,’ he demanded, both hands coming up to fasten on her upper arms.

She felt the words roll off her tongue for the first time, making them real. ‘I’m pregnant.’

He gave her a light shake, although he was so busy trying to absorb the idea she was sure he didn’t really know what he was doing. Emotions flashed across his face, signalling the passage of his thoughts.

‘You said that to me when you stabbed me, but I thought afterwards you must have been trying to shock me long enough to gain an advantage so I didn’t believe it. I didn’t believe what Palpatine said either, I assumed he read that conversation in your mind. But it was true? Are you sure?’

She shrugged, trying to get her arms back. ‘Reach out.’

He closed his eyes and a frown developed between his brows. ‘I feel it,’ he breathed. ‘Sparks in the Force. Two of them. Oh.’

He snatched her to his chest and she could no longer see his expression but his shoulders were trembling and his body heaved with huge, unsteady breaths. He smelled strongly of metal this evening, she noted, undercut with the pungent aroma of old alcohol leaching through his pores.

He drew a shuddering breath. ‘How did this happen?’

She raised her hands to his back tentatively to return the hug, if this was a hug. ‘I didn’t need contraception before I met you. I wasn’t using any.’

‘I was. Maybe it failed.’

‘Maybe.’

Rey had had several weeks to think about this, since her excuse that the lateness of her cycle was simply stress induced had stopped being convincing, and she had started to lose her breakfast to the fresher on a regular basis. Even when she dragged herself to the rudimentary medical bay on the battered ship she piloted she knew the answer before the scans had stopped running. Maybe she’d always known, right from the moment of conception. Maybe that was why the dark side, always ready to expose the worst in her, had revealed that knowledge as a form of attack. It was possible that she was exceedingly fertile, and it was possible that his method of delivery was supremely effective, but there was also a good chance that the Force didn’t really approve of having all its power concentrated in the hands of two people and had decided to give someone else a go.

It felt good to have someone to tell though, it was such a relief to be able to say the words, although she was terrified of what they meant.

‘I’m pregnant,’ she whispered to herself, finding that she was sitting on the sofa with him kneeling on the floor in front of her. She wiped her eyes furiously but he didn’t seem to notice, running his fingers through his hair, his attention darting in any direction but hers.

Eventually he steeled himself enough to speak. ‘If I make you feel under pressure, it isn’t intentional.’

She had never seen him look so young, or so vulnerable, on his knees at her feet, gazing up at her with those haunted eyes.

‘This is your decision and I’ll support you whatever you choose. What we have, this relationship, isn’t exactly stable and I’m… struggling at the moment so the timing’s not ideal. I’d understand if you decided not to go ahead. Children need security, and love, and parents who aren’t actually trying to kill each other so if that’s your decision then I won’t fight you. Or if you do want to go ahead but you don’t want me around then I can support that too. I’d like to visit them sometimes, or maybe they could stay with me for holidays, I don’t know, we could work it out.’

He paused, and his face had become a white blur in the darkness because an ocean of tears was trying to pour its way through her eyes and no matter how frequently she wiped the water away, it kept on coming. She hadn’t sat still like this since the battle on Exegol, she’d been too busy trying to save him and she’d pushed everything else to the back of her mind, or tried to. Now it was all coming out.

‘There’s a third option, of course,’ he offered, in a diffident tone. ‘You could always fall hopelessly in love with me, we could get married and live happily ever after. No pressure.’

She put her hands over her face and sobbed harder. The sofa dipped as it took his weight and he patted her awkwardly on the back.

‘Uncontrollable crying. That’s the reaction I always get when I ask people to marry me. Actually, it’s probably better than last time. Last time you broke my lightsaber in half and ran away.’

She smiled, and snuffled and tried for control, grinding the heels of her palms into her eyeballs.

‘It will be alright,’ he said softly. ‘We can get to know each other better and see what happens. This can’t be what you wanted for your life – pregnant by a galactic war criminal in a hovel on the Outer Rim – but we’ll make it work. And if it doesn’t, that’s alright too. It’s not as if our children will grow up to be Supreme Leader of the First Order or Empress of the Sith or anything.’

She gave him a wan smile, still wiping her eyes, although the flow was lessening. ‘Aren’t you scared?’

He picked up her hand and held it. ‘It’s alright to be afraid. I’m terrified of what you just asked me to do – take responsibility for all the awful things I’ve done. Face other people, face myself when I feel so guilty I’d rather put on a mask and hide. I’m not sure I have the courage to do that.’ He kissed the back of her hand. ‘Loving you is the one thing I’m not afraid of.’

Tears came again but she let them fall and straightened her back. ‘How do we begin?’

He grinned, a pure, uncomplicated grin. ‘Same as always. Breakfast.’

‘It’s time for dinner.’ She glanced at the kitchen dubiously. ‘Are you cooking? Do you know how to cook?’

He shucked off his coat and flung it over the back of the chair, rolling up his sleeves. ‘I’ve been teaching myself. Luke keeps popping by to offer advice but he seems to have some strange ideas about what’s edible so I try to ignore him.’

She followed him over to the kitchen and leant against the doorway, watching him assemble a collection of bowls, pans and tools before grabbing eggs and a selection of eclectic ingredients from the cupboards and beginning to whisk something enthusiastically.

‘Don’t you need an apron? Or a hat?’

‘No.’

‘Can I record this and send it to Hux? He loves a recording.’

‘No.’

‘If I’m sick after I’ve eaten will you take it personally?’

‘No.’ He attempted to frown but she could tell he was faking. ‘I’m going out with the Knights again tomorrow. Do you want to come? Apparently one of the cloning supervisors from Exegol escaped and there’s a rumour that he’s planning to resurrect Palpatine. Again. How many times can one man die?’

This was going to be normal, she decided. This was how they were going to define ordinary, just a chat over breakfast and a plan for the day. He tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, frowning in concentration as he tipped the concoction into a pan and something opened up inside her, some kind of soft and comfortable place that reminded her of warm arms and gentle words and the joy of simple things. It had the familiarity and security of the Force bond but the power it held was different, all encompassing, enduring, the sort of power that could suffuse a hovel and make it a home. She welcomed the feeling, let it surround and support her as naturally as if it had always been there, waiting for her to find it.

She had been silent too long. He glanced over at her quickly and it was there in the air between them, in the space before a smile, the connection forged by giant cosmic forces of light and dark burning brightly in a kitchen on a distant planet amidst the smell of burning eggs. The corner of his mouth turned up as he felt it too and her lips lifted in response. She no longer needed to touch him for the love between them to wake, it was simply alive inside her and all around, all the time, for as long as she wanted it.

‘Let me help you with that,’ she said.


End file.
